The Day I left It On the Train

I had left for Paris heartbroken and a little lost, so I spent much of the train ride looking out the window at the world passing me by. As I watched the landscape change from countryside to cityscape. I contemplated who I wanted to be and tried to reconcile it with the woman who had escaped here to write and hide...

I imagined all the common human experiences and that somewhere there was a woman like me, contemplating her life, Parisienne Tania, likely on the top balcony, hands wrapped around a steaming café au lait, legs crossed and... head tipped back in laughter. 

THAT caught my attention because I did not tip my head back in laughter.

I did not laugh.

Ever.