The Day After

I am part of a duo that is presenting to a larger group at my place of employment.? Sounds harmless…… and it is.? In fact, I love the topic and enjoy presenting to people in a way that will hopefully provide engagement and thought.? But if am I being honest, I have some reservations…or maybe even some anxiety about the presentation.? Not about the presentation itself.? Our presentation is about a creative upgrade to “Legal 3.0” for in house counsel (the conceptual idea coming from Peter Attia’s Outlive and his concepts of Medicine 3.0).? My concern is about the date of the presentation.? We present on November 6th.?

Why is that date significant?? If you really don’t know, here is a clue via a question.? Are you burned out on all the political ads?? Yes, November 6th is the day following the election.?

My angst is based upon the palatable division between so many people on initiatives and particular candidates.? Because of this, I will assume there will be some unhappy people on the day after.?

Politics has always been ugly to me (and yes, I was a Political Science major).? With social media there seems to be an amplification of “aggressive” discussions from “both sides.”? There appear to be more judgements on how the “other” side is wrong, misinformed or even idiotic.?

While those statements may be factually correct (I am talking about the misinformation), none of us are in positions to judge others for their political beliefs.? We each have our own…for the most part.? Ever wonder how you arrived at your beliefs??

During the pandemic, I became fascinated around the debate of lockdowns or other measures of how to handle the Covid-19 virus. One observation regarding the lockdowns and the discussion of it was how it made you feel was based upon your perspective. ?I know..mind blowing stuff.? But it really comes down to, what is important to you.? What you value or how would the lockdowns impact you, your family, your community, your livelihood or even your identity.? The order of which would be determined by you (your values).?

Whether or not we see it, quantify it, acknowledge it or even write it down, we all have our own values.? Those values shape how you think, what you think and probably to some extent creates your “identity.”?

How does that apply to the lockdowns.? Here are a couple of simple examples:

If you owned a business that was dependent upon customers coming to your place of business, you were more likely opposed to any lockdowns. ?And that makes sense.? From your perspective.? (and if you are making judgments about this individual right now….be aware of this…??)

On the flip side, if you or a family member had a co-morbidity and was at risk, you would generally support a lockdown.? And that makes sense. ?

Obviously, the circumstances can get interesting when you have a combination of these scenarios (you own a business and you or your family member was high risk with Covid) you would assess your value system and make a judgement on what you thought would be best.? ?

Our political opinions are similar.? Based upon our situation and what is important to us, most of us have created our own opinions.? Based upon those opinions we may become frustrated that the other side doesn’t hear our point of view.? The problem as I see it, is there is a lot of talking and overtalking and not a lot of listening and understanding.?

Two points.? One, no matter what the topic of the conversation, we should never check our “humanity” at the door.? Secondly, we are all on our own unique path.?

Never check your humanity at the door.? I have used this line in the past when providing our Legal Training for Bankers.? I have noticed over the years a “disconnect” between something that is probably emotional for our customers, while our employees will think from a transactional point of view.? This is not a criticism, as I still do the same thing.? We just need to have better awareness around this.?

For example, there is a natural tendency to think transactionally and not emotionally when getting a legal document from a customer.? Since we became aware of this, we have asked the Bankers….how does that make you feel?? ?We have heard many answers, but there were consistent themes.? Most answers are “scared, anxious and worried.”

I understand the question is asking specifically how it makes them feel. ?But that is the starting point.? Then we “flip the script.”? We ask, how do you think that Customer feels?? ?Understand if an individual is bringing in Letters of Personal Representative that probably means a family member has passed away.? Understand where they are coming from and meet them there emotionally.? Don’t check your humanity at the door.? ?That includes political discussions.? ?

Even though we have a lot of shared experiences, we are on our own path.? I believe my small-town upbringing has shaped me in many ways.? It has in part, made me who I am today.? Understand, I am not making a judgement that who I am today is better or worse than if I would have been raised in a different environment, I am just acknowledging that I would be different under different circumstances.? We have our own unique encounters and circumstances and upbringing that have shaped us in ways that make us unique.?

Take these two points…and we can start to have an understanding that we are not all the same.? We will not always think and feel the same about topics.? That is ok.? That is what is great about our country.? We can and probably should think differently.? Where I believe things can go wrong is our judgements that others are incorrect for thinking a certain way or supporting a particular candidate.? Simple stated, we have not walked in those shoes.? We can only speak about our own journey.? ?

I know this is fundamental and obvious comments.? I also believe there is more that connects us than divides us.? We all suffer pain and loss, and joy and success. ?I hope we can start with that.

Healthy debate will only come from a place of respect, kindness and understanding.? So, as we approach Election Tuesday, please, don’t check your humanity at the door and understand, we are all on our own unique path.??

Also, wish me luck on November 6th “Presentation Wednesday” ??. ?