DAY 2 OF 100DAYS SELF-REINVENTION SERIES. “Thought Creates the World and Then Says, "I didn't do it"” – David Bohn

DAY 2 OF 100DAYS SELF-REINVENTION SERIES.

“Thought Creates the World and Then Says, "I didn't do it"” – David Bohn

Creating Meanings That Empower You: Realizing Mental Resilience

The e-mail you got from your boss yesterday had no meaning until you gave it your unique meaning. The text message you just read on your phone had no meaning until you assigned one to it. Your boss's refusal to return your call had no meaning until you gave it one. The news that your company will be laying off 20% of its staff had no meaning until you gave it one. The competitor moving in across the street meant nothing until you gave it meaning.? The downturn in the market meant nothing until you created a meaning for it; therefore, all these feelings that go against your success have been caused by your thoughts, not by any event or news. Your spouse not picking up your call for the last three hours meant nothing until you gave it your meaning. So, the other driver cut in on you in traffic in the wrong way, and that has unsettled your emotions. Really? Events have no life in themselves. Even the “brutal murder” you just saw on television had no meaning until you gave it one.

“We, as a collective culture, have bought into the belief that events and people can make us feel and act a certain way. This belief is the biggest obstacle to having an OK business, an OK career, an OK marriage, a fantastic innovative company, and a blissful life.

Events cannot cause feelings because they do not have that power.? It's not how the brain works. The biological computer processes thoughts. That's it. That's all. Thoughts. Nothing else.

It is always and only processing your thoughts. It is not processing "situations”. It only feels that way. But it also "feels like" the earth is flat, and it "feels like" the sun goes away at night. We misinterpret a lot! Until we don't. And once we don't, the biocomputer can now be used for what it was intended to be used for to get you what you really want. Question your thinking.” - Richard Habets

Since learning this subtle trick of how life works, I have experienced greater resilience in my personal life. I have gone through some personal life situations that would have really caused my feet to slip if they happened before I practiced these principles.

Not long ago, I needed to be completely undressed for a medical examination. My wife, who is a doctor and worked in the same hospital, began working the politics of the hospital to ensure that a male doctor examined me. She told me stories of patients who chose to go home when a doctor of the same sex was not available to carry out a similar examination.

In one heart-rending story from working at a previous hospital, she told me of a woman who was supposed to be examined for cancer of the cervix but refused to be examined even by a female doctor, insisting that only her husband could get access to certain parts of her body. Despite pleas from other female medical officers, this woman would not yield; she finally died refusing treatment. Back to my appointment, my wife played the politics well and got me a male doctor to examine me. Owing to what I know about making meanings, I could not care less about who examined me. If there was no male doctor on duty, I would have insisted to be seen by any female doctor that was available. The issue isn't who examines me; the issue is the meaning I make from the event.

No two people work in the same company with the same experience of the company. As expert meaning-makers, we are always trying to second-guess people. I remember working in a company some years ago. I enjoyed a particularly good working relationship with my boss (Now I can see that I was the one making the meaning, and I am glad I made positive meanings). Then suddenly, my boss will not stop by my office as before. My mind started racing from one event to the other.

This situation went on for nearly two weeks. My blood pressure was rising. I tried to find out from a few colleagues if they were experiencing any sudden change of behavior from the boss, but I was shocked that they had no clue what I was talking about. They could not see sense in what I was feeling. The more these negative thoughts wrapped me up, the greater the seeming distance between me and the boss.

I got home and told my wife that I seemed to have fallen out of favor with my boss. I rang a company that offered me a job earlier, which I turned down, and told them I was willing to take up the job. They immediately sent me a new offer, though with improved pay, but less than my current pay.? Armed with an alternative offer, I privately went to see my boss in his office to be sure everything was OK.

He seemed baffled by some of the questions I asked him. During the conversation, I would come to find out that my boss was going through an exceedingly difficult domestic challenge and was in fact thinking of increasing my responsibilities temporarily. The meanings I created got me screwed.

The seeming silence and distance that you are perceiving from your buddies, means nothing until you give it your unique meaning. The omission of your name from the list of invited guests in that party, means nothing until you give it your unique meaning.

There is an interesting story in the Bible of how a king CREATED NEGATIVE MEANING FROM A SUPPOSEDLY POSITIVE SITUATION USING THE MEANING MAKING POWER OF THINKING. The Story is in 1Chronicles 19: 1-4:

?“In the course of time, Nahash king of the Ammonites died, and his son succeeded him as king. 2 David thought, “I will show kindness to Hanun son of Nahash, because his father showed kindness to me.” So, David sent a delegation to express his sympathy to Hanun concerning his father.

When David's envoys came to Hanun in the land of the Ammonites to express sympathy to him, 3 the Ammonite commanders said to Hanun, “Do you think David is honouring your father by sending envoys to you to express sympathy? Haven't his envoys come to you only to explore and spy out the country and overthrow it?” 4 So Hanun seized David's envoys, shaved them, cut off their garments at the buttocks, and sent them away.

David wanted to do the King good; but the King and his subjects THOUGHT otherwise. Read from verse 4 -19 to see the destruction that a wrong thinking created.

What meanings are you making from your current situation? What meanings are you making in your current relationships or workplace?

You can use your thinking to create PAIN or HAPPINESS. The decision is yours, ALWAYS!