Dare to Be Yourself

Many of us have, no doubt, experienced times or even situations when we have felt the need to act differently from what feels to be our true self. It’s common to get caught up in trying to be someone you’re not, to keep everyone else happy. But by not staying true to yourself, you end up creating your own unhappiness.

Are you seeing signs of any of the following:

1. You are unhappy - if you’re not staying true to yourself, you’re most likely desperately unhappy, and probably angry. You’re angry at yourself, your family, your friends… the whole world. You aren’t happy with your current situation whatever that may be.

2. You hide your emotions - it’s more than just putting on a brave face in a tough time. You hide all of your emotions. Anger, hurt, frustration, sadness… you bottle them up and keep them inside, in hopes that no one can get close enough to see the real you and to understand what you’re feeling. You often avoid dealing with what’s really going on, and if someone hurt you, you don’t even consider letting the person know.

3. You judge others - you lash out at someone else by making a crude remark about their appearance, personality or lifestyle.

4. You look to others for approval - you measure your self-worth by how your boss at work treats you.

5. You do not trust your decisions - you’re constantly changing your mind and wondering if you made the right decision. You don’t trust your instinct.

6. Your life is largely controlled by someone else - you find that people around you are always throwing advice at you, even when you didn’t ask for it and you take what they say to heart. At work for example, you let others have too much control over your life. You let their unsolicited opinion affect you in ways that it shouldn’t.

7. You are too hard on yourself - when you feel that you made the wrong choice, you beat yourself up about it for weeks.

8. You feel the need to lie - even if it’s a white lie, you find yourself never really telling the whole truth to anyone. You’re worried that others might not approve of the truth, so you tailor your story to fit their wants or needs.

9. You constantly do things you dislike - whether it’s keeping a job that you hate, keep changing jobs or participating in a bad habit to keep up appearances.

10. You are not following your heart - your head may be making the decisions, but all the while, your heart is feeling the pain of having to mask your true self.

Life is a journey of becoming the highest version of who you are, and no one gets it right every time. We all have bratty moments. We all have generous moments. We all go through ups and downs and experience scary new encounters.

But you can always come back to who you are, because your true essence never wavers. In moments of fear or uncertainty, give yourself a gentle nudge and say, “I’m enough no matter what. So which 'myself' is the most suitable and loving to be right now?”

And rock being that. These are the exact things I help my clients to overcome.

Sheila Khetani

To arrange an initial discussion, please contact me at [email protected]