Dare to Be You: Rising Above Self-Limiting Beliefs

"It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not." – Author Unknown

During a development workshop, I was working with an experienced team of salespeople —and one person stood out more than the others. She was friendly and pleasant, but every time I checked in with her for coaching, she'd offer up an excuse or a self-critical remark. She never felt like her work was as good as the others'. These self-deprecating comments flowed from her like a river in spring, flooding everything she did.

“I made a mistake,” she said, as I glanced over her shoulder to review her input on a sales idea we were working on.

“Okay, show me where,” I replied. “Let’s figure it out.”

“I mixed it all up,” she continued.

“No problem,” I reassured her. “Let’s see what you’ve got. Where do you think the mistake is?”

“I wrote some things down, but it’s not good enough.”

“What do you mean ‘not good enough’?” I asked.

“It just isn’t. I always mess these kinds of things up,” she answered.

“Aren’t you being a little hard on yourself?”

“I do that a lot,” she admitted.

“Why?”

“I’m not as good as the others.”

“Who told you that?”

“No one. I just know it.”

This conversation looped around, until it hit me—she was unconsciously lowering her own standards to blend in with the group. Despite her clear potential, she had conditioned herself to believe she’d never be as good as the others. Her words were shaping her reality, and her confidence was withering as a result.

Here’s the truth: Until she recognized the damage these thoughts were doing to her self-esteem, she would continue to drift through life, stuck in mediocrity. She was floating in a sea of average results because she was allowing herself to believe she was average. The rift between who she thought she was and who she could be was growing.

Does this sound like an isolated incident? It’s not.

Many people are trapped by the same fear. Afraid to stand out, they dim their own light to fit in with the crowd. They make excuses, apologize for their talents, and shrink into a shadow of who they could be—wishing, deep down, that they could be more.

Stop that mindset! Interrupt that cycle!

If you want to be confident, if you want to step into the person you’re meant to be, it starts by abandoning self-limiting beliefs. Don’t focus on “fitting in.” Instead, be true to yourself. Bring your skills, your knowledge, and your authenticity to the forefront.

Feeling stress trying to blend in? That’s your subconscious telling you you're out of alignment with your values. To get back on track, you have to willfully swim against the current of mediocrity and start surrounding yourself with people who see your inner strength.

You can’t do it alone—it takes courage and, often, coaching from someone who can see your potential clearly. Seek out those who can challenge you and help you grow. Embrace the identity that reflects who you truly are, and act as if you’ve already arrived at that version of yourself.

This week, ask yourself: Are your results a product of trying to fit in, or are they coming from a place of hiding who you really are? Decide what you want, and step into it with full conviction.

Make this your best week ever and make an impact!

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