Daily Reflection: How to Avoid Looking Back at Someone You Don't Know

In my Substack Newsletter I write an additional section entitled, Pearls of Wisdom.??Over the past few weeks, I've strung together a few Pearls; wisdom that I've borrowed from the Stoics. Each pearl, unique in beauty and meaning, and ,of course, full of wisdom.

Today I paused and spent time with each Pearl.??The intent was to?write??a quick blurb about Pearl # 7, but I found myself so inspired I ended up writing this article.??So today, after I spent time admiring the collection, I decided to share its shimmer with you and unveil Pearl # 7, Daily Reflection:

Pearl #1: Wake up Early

Pearl #2: Be Prepared

Pearl #3: Spend Time in Stillness

Pearl #4: Focus on the Essential (Temperance)

Pearl #5:??Optimism in Spite of Challenges

Pearl #6: Take a Walk

I began this section with my own reflection in honor of Pearl # 7, Daily Reflection.???As I try to bring the Stoics wisdom to modern day life, I revisited the Disney Movie, Mulan.??The movie's theme song, Reflection, is sung by Christina Aguilera. As the song peaks, Christina's vocals soar,

?"Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me???When will my reflection show who I am inside?"

If you don't remember the storyline, Mulan had to impersonate a man to join the Chinese military. She was pretending to be someone she wasn't in order to be someone she wanted and needed to be.??In order to pull that off, she had to dig deep, come up with several plans of actions, backup plans and reflect on what was working and not working.

Lots was at stake.

You may not need to impersonate the opposite sex to join the military, but you probably impersonate something each day.??Perhaps you pretend to feel better than you actually do.??Maybe you act more prepared for the meeting than you really are.??Are you ready to onboard the new client or are you still scrambling? How can you stop these types of impersonations?

You could take advice from the Stoics and top off each day with a plan and end it with thoughtful reflection.

The Stoics didn't just start their days early, focused with a plan of action.??They pondered about the day, walking around, saying no to non-essentials and they were comfortable spending time with their thoughts.??Perhaps some of that could be attributed to the era in which they lived and a lack of distractions, but I believe much of their life was built around habits that drove their way of life.??It was a proven recipe, for what the Stoics called, "a good life."

Pearl # 7:??Daily Reflection - Why Bother?

Why reflect???Isn't yesterday a thing of the past???A day gone by???You can't get it back so why spend anytime thinking about the proverbial milk that you may or may not have spilled?

The Stoics would argue, but probably not in these words - It's a way of incorporating quality control or self-improvement checks and measures into your day.

Seneca felt strongly about reflection, so much so that he felt skipping it was evil:

?"For this is what makes us evil - that none of us looks back upon our own lives.??We reflect upon only that which we are about to do.??And yet our plans for the future descend from the past." - Seneca

?This is one of my all time favorite quotes.??There is so much wealth wrapped up in these words that I could write about it for days, but I'll keep my thoughts to a few key points:

?

1.?Planning - we plan our tomorrow, our goals, our next steps but they are informed by today and yesterday. Seneca was spot on.??We take data, information, and our gut instinct from the past to decide about the future, thus we must reflect.

2. Character Building - "Avoiding Evil?"- Seneca thought it was evil not reflect and perhaps that's a strong word, but let's not get wrapped up in semantics. Maybe it is evil to:

• Miss an opportunity to apologize when you have wronged someone.
• Hold a grudge.
• Continue doing something that doesn't serve you well.
• Maybe it's causing you to "miss out on life" because you don't ask yourself:
• How you can do better???Improve?
• Better use your time?
• Navigate challenges?
• Maintain perspective?

Reflection isn't meant to be a time to sit with yourself so you can jot down all of your shortcomings. It's a time to work on yourself.??It's a time for discernment.

?What's your next play???You are playing the role of a coach whose watching the replay of a game that's already been won or lost.??He or She watches the nuances of the game.??They pay close attention to the plays; the ins and the outs.??How did the plays pan out???What went right???What went wrong?

Reflection can happen with a pen and paper or as you go for a walk.??It just needs to happen.??I enjoy reflecting over my workday at the end of each day and if I get too busy I spend time reflecting the next morning before I jump into a new day.

• What did I finish?
• What did I start and leave unfinished?
• Why?
• Did I get distracted?
• When did I charge and recharge my engine? My brain and my body?
• What type of work fueled my engine vs. drained my engine?

The answers to my questions direct my daily path and make me more efficient and effective.??The Stoics ritualized daily reviews long before the Full Focus Planner recommended workday startups and shut-downs, but I'd have to say I agree with Seneca.????Even though evil is a bit of a strong word, it does seem nearly evil not to reflect on a daily basis.??

"After all, it's in the mirror of yesterday that the path of tomorrow will be found."__??Kimberly Sheldahl

And remember the lyrics of the song ....,

"Who is that girl I see, staring straight back at me???When will my reflection show who I am inside?"

You'll be more inclined to find who you really are, staring straight back at you, if you spend time asking the questions that show you that truth.

Pearl#7:??Daily Reflection

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