The “D” Word and Why It’s Needed

I’m a Gen Xer with a Gen Alpha kid. At my son’s kindergarten graduation, I nearly fainted when they announced him as a member of the class of 2037. My AARP-approaching brain can barely comprehend what it will take to stay abreast of emerging trends and new ways of thinking that I can’t even imagine right now.

Because of the age gap between my child and me, I often think about my legacy—what I will leave behind for him and the impact I make daily so he and others won’t have to endure the hard lessons I’ve faced at work.

Once, I was full of optimism about my career possibilities as an academic. I yearned to pursue research questions that would transform the world. But beyond science, technology, engineering, and math—or even the social sciences and humanities—I learned about the good, the bad, and the ugly sides of people. I began to see the distinctions between fact and perception, truth and pretense. Along this journey, I discovered my voice and learned how to use it, even when it was frightening.

Today, my bio mentions that I am a disruptor. According to the Merriam-Webster definition, someone who disrupts “interrupts the normal course or unity of.” Over time, I’ve used words such as disruptor and accomplice to define the shifts to move massive systems focused on protecting the majority, not including all. I hold to this idea of disruption as I hear stories of the underdogs who are steps away from falling apart because an organization harms them but does nothing to acknowledge their wrong or restore people who have been fractured. Something about that doesn’t sit right with me.

Just as I was initially reluctant to launch the Stop Playing Diversity? movement, I resisted the notion of being a disruptor. I wanted to simply “be.” But that would have been too easy.

So, what does it feel like to hold a vision that challenges the status quo? It’s lonely, frightening, and uncomfortable. Yet, what’s even more uncomfortable is not walking fully in my calling. I can’t bear seeing someone in need and knowing I have the skills and talent to help them but don't. Fear of isolation doesn’t keep me up at night; the thought of not acting on a directive to help someone in need does.

A few weeks ago, I sat at the small table in my office and prayed, trying to stay calm as people around me sought solutions that weren’t apparent in my organization. After studying my workplace from top to bottom and seeking policies to address cracks in the system, I recognized a glaring lack of support for those most impacted by a toxic culture and a lack of integrity. Hopelessness overwhelmed me, causing me to step away and regroup.

Over time, I’ve gathered some key insights and shared them with mentees about what it means to be a disruptor:

• Believe in the dysfunction and confusion you see in spaces that promote excellence, productivity, and equity. I often refer to Dr. Joy Degruy’s work on post traumatic slave syndrome, where she discusses the cognitive dissonance where the U.S. professes equality and justice yet politicians have crafted centuries-old narratives that disparage marginalized groups.
• Speak the truth about what you observe in your organization. If something is wrong, call it out, and back it up with data, facts, and patterns.
• Prepare for pushback and the potential withdrawal of favor when you expose inequities. These actions are designed to silence, alienate, or break you.
• Anticipate double standards. Favorable rules will often apply to those upholding the system, while punitive rules are reserved for disruptors.

These points are especially relevant as we approach a pivotal U.S. presidential election, one that could have lasting impacts on our values and the law.

At this moment in U.S. history, we must align our principles with justice. Many of us cannot trust the words of leaders whose statements invalidate us and our existence. To maintain mental well-being, we must challenge the status quo. No one born on this earth is a mistake, regardless of how they look, what they believe, or whom they love.

The next generation of leaders must be disruptors who return to the true ideals of justice for all. They must refuse to be confined by unjust rules and should not cower when others attempt to diminish their humanity.

All it takes is one voice to declare that policies and practices are inequitable. Armies of social justice advocates are rising to protect disruptors so that organizations can do real, meaningful work.

Now is the time to speak up. What will you do?

Dr. Monica Cox is a professor, entrepreneur, author, and disruptor who guides leaders to drive systemic change and offers prophetic insights for clarity and restoration from toxic workplaces. ?She uses fictional counternarratives in her novels and is the author of Never Defeated, an institutional healing balm for people who've been harmed by work or for leaders who want to create safer, more equitable spaces for employees to thrive. If you’re interested in coaching or consulting with Dr. Cox, complete this form.