"CURTAIL CYBER BULLYING, SAVE THE VICTIMS"

Cyberbullying Effects. Like all forms of bullying, cyberbullying causes psychological, emotional and physical stress. Each person's response to being bullied is unique, but research has shown some general tendencies. StopBullying.gov reports that youth who are bullied have a higher risk of depression and anxiety.

What Is Cyberbullying

Cyberbullying is bullying that takes place over digital devices like cell phones, computers, and tablets. Cyberbullying can occur through SMS, Text, and apps, or online in social media, forums, or gaming where people can view, participate in, or share content. Cyberbullying includes sending, posting, or sharing negative, harmful, false, or mean content about someone else. It can include sharing personal or private information about someone else causing embarrassment or humiliation. Some cyberbullying crosses the line into unlawful or criminal behavior.

The most common places where cyberbullying occurs are:

• Social Media, such as Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, and Twitter
• SMS (Short Message Service) also known as Text Message sent through devices
• Instant Message (via devices, email provider services, apps, and social media messaging features)
• Email

What is cyberbullying, exactly?

"Cyberbullying" is when a child, preteen or teen is tormented, threatened, harassed, humiliated, embarrassed or otherwise targeted by another child, preteen or teen using the Internet, interactive and digital technologies or mobile phones. It has to have a minor on both sides, or at least have been instigated by a minor against another minor. Once adults become involved, it is plain and simple cyber-harassment or cyberstalking. Adult cyber-harassment or cyberstalking is NEVER called cyberbullying.

It isn't when adult are trying to lure children into offline meetings, that is called sexual exploitation or luring by a sexual predator. But sometimes when a minor starts a cyberbullying campaign it involves sexual predators who are intrigued by the sexual harassment or even ads posted by the cyberbullying offering up the victim for sex.

The methods used are limited only by the child's imagination and access to technology. And the cyberbully one moment may become the victim the next. The kids often change roles, going from victim to bully and back again.

Children have killed each other and committed suicide after having been involved in a cyberbullying incident.

Cyberbullying is usually not a one time communication, unless it involves a death threat or a credible threat of serious bodily harm. Kids usually know it when they see it, while parents may be more worried about the lewd language used by the kids than the hurtful effect of rude and embarrassing posts.

Cyberbullying may rise to the level of a misdemeanor cyberharassment charge, or if the child is young enough may result in the charge of juvenile delinquency. Most of the time the cyberbullying does not go that far, although parents often try and pursue criminal charges. It typically can result in a child losing their ISP or IM accounts as a terms of service violation. And in some cases, if hacking or password and identity theft is involved, can be a serious criminal matter under state and federal law.

When schools try and get involved by disciplining the student for cyberbullying actions that took place off-campus and outside of school hours, they are often sued for exceeding their authority and violating the student's free speech right. They also, often lose. Schools can be very effective brokers in working with the parents to stop and remedy cyberbullying situations. They can also educate the students on cyberethics and the law. If schools are creative, they can sometimes avoid the claim that their actions exceeded their legal authority for off-campus cyberbullying actions. We recommend that a provision is added to the school's acceptable use policy reserving the right to discipline the student for actions taken off-campus if they are intended to have an effect on a student or they adversely affect the safety and well-being of student while in school. This makes it a contractual, not a constitutional, issue.

Special Concerns

With the prevalence of social media and digital forums, comments, photos, posts, and content shared by individuals can often be viewed by strangers as well as acquaintances. The content an individual shares online – both their personal content as well as any negative, mean, or hurtful content – creates a kind of permanent public record of their views, activities, and behavior. This public record can be thought of as an online reputation, which may be accessible to schools, employers, colleges, clubs, and others who may be researching an individual now or in the future. Cyberbullying can harm the online reputations of everyone involved – not just the person being bullied, but those doing the bullying or participating in it. Cyberbullying has unique concerns in that it can be:

Persistent – Digital devices offer an ability to immediately and continuously communicate 24 hours a day, so it can be difficult for children experiencing cyberbullying to find relief.

Permanent – Most information communicated electronically is permanent and public, if not reported and removed. A negative online reputation, including for those who bully, can impact college admissions, employment, and other areas of life.

Hard to Notice – Because teachers and parents may not overhear or see cyberbullying taking place, it is harder to recognize.

Laws and Sanctions

While all states have criminal laws that apply to bullying, not all have special statutes that apply to cyberbullying or bullying that takes place outside of school. Schools may take action either as required by law, or with local or school policies that allow them to discipline or take other action. Some states also have provisions to address bullying if it affects school performance. You can learn about the laws and policies in each state, including if they cover cyberbullying.

Frequency of Cyberbullying

The 2014–2015 School Crime Supplement - PDF (National Center for Education Statistics and Bureau of Justice Statistics) indicates that, nationwide, about 21% of students ages 12-18 experienced bullying.

The 2015 Youth Risk Behavior Surveillance System (Centers for Disease Control and Prevention) also indicates that an estimated 16% of high school students were bullied electronically in the 12 months prior to the survey.

Why do kids cyberbully each other?

Who knows why kids do anything? When it comes to cyberbullying, they are often motivated by anger, revenge or frustration. Sometimes they do it for entertainment or because they are bored and have too much time on their hands and too many tech toys available to them. Many do it for laughs or to get a reaction. Some do it by accident, and either send a message to the wrong recipient or didn't think before they did something. The Power-hungry do it to torment others and for their ego. Revenge of the nerd may start out defending themselves from traditional bullying only to find that they enjoy being the tough guy or gal. Mean girls do it to help bolster or remind people of their own social standing. And some think they are righting wrong and standing up for others.

Because their motives differ, the solutions and responses to each type of cyberbullying incident has to differ too. Unfortunately, there is no "one size fits all" when cyberbullying is concerned. Only two of the types of cyberbullies have something in common with the traditional schoolyard bully. Experts who understand schoolyard bullying often misunderstand cyberbullying, thinking it is just another method of bullying. But the motives and the nature of cybercommunications, as well as the demographic and profile of a cyberbully differ from their offline counterpart.

Cyberbullying Tactics

It is important to understand how children are cyberbullied so it can be easily recognized and action can be taken. Some of the most common cyberbullying tactics include:

• Posting comments or rumors about someone online that are mean, hurtful, or embarrassing.
• Threatening to hurt someone or telling them to kill themselves. 
• Posting a mean or hurtful picture or video. 
• Pretending to be someone else online in order to solicit or post personal or false information about someone else. 
• Posting mean or hateful names, comments, or content about any race, religion, ethnicity, or other personal characteristics online.
• Creating a mean or hurtful webpage about someone. 
• Doxing, an abbreviated form of the word documents, is a form of online harassment used to exact revenge and to threaten and destroy the privacy of individuals by making their personal information public, including addresses, social security, credit card and phone numbers, links to social media accounts, and other private data.

Viral Tactics: Examples

Because cyberbullying can happen in different ways, examples based on real-life experiences can provide a deeper understanding of the tactics typically used. Along with other risk factors, bullying can increase the risk for suicide-related behaviors. Furthermore, cyberbullying can be relentless, increasing the likelihood of anxiety and depression. Some states have chosen to prosecute young people who bully for criminal harassment, including encouraging someone to die by suicide. Some forms of cyberbullying are forms of harassment that cross the line into criminal activity, and some tactics occur in dating relationships and can turn into interpersonal violence. 

The stories below are examples of different cyberbullying tactics that could happen. In reality, with the right interventions, cyberbullying can be addressed positively to lessen harm and the negative outcomes that could result. When not addressed, cyberbullying can have long-term mental health effects. Cyberbullying and bullying can negatively impact the lives of all who are involved.

Nude photo sharing 

A teenage girl sent a nude photo of herself to her boyfriend while they were dating. After they broke up, he shared the photo with other children, who then called her hurtful, derogatory names via text and social media. 

Lies and false accusations

A group of students got into trouble at school for being drunk, and accused a girl who knew nothing about it of reporting them to school officials. They began texting her day and night, and posted hateful, derogatory messages on social media. Other students saw their messages and joined in harassing the girl. She was bullied constantly via text, and in person at school. She eventually shut down her social media accounts and changed her phone number. Still, the bullying at school continued.

Bullied for being economically challenged 

Students posted mean, negative comments on another classmates’ social media account, commenting on his clothes and sneakers, which were not the more expensive name brands most of them were wearing. They ridiculed him, calling him “poor” and continued the bullying in school. The boy missed many days of school trying to avoid the harassment and embarrassment.

False identity profile 

A girl’s classmate created a fake social media account in a boy’s name, and began an online relationship with her. Though she had not met him in person, the girl divulged personal information about herself and her family to this “boy”. The classmate who created the fake account then shared the personal information with other children, who used it to bully, shame, and harass the girl. 

Encouraging self-harm or suicide 

A young boy with a physical disability and scars on his face was harassed on social media and via text by other students. They called him derogatory names, told him he’d be better off dead. They wrote “why don’t you die?” on his school locker and encouraged him to take his own life. 

Bullied for being gay 

A teenage boy who was openly gay began receiving death threats via phone, text, and social media for being gay. Students created an anti-gay social media group and harassed him, posting hateful messages about him. 

Jealousy bullying 

A teenage girl was harassed by other girls in her class for dating a very popular boy. The girls sent her hateful messages via text and social media, and wrote derogatory messages on her school locker. 

Doxing Over Online Gaming

A teenage boy posted comments on a public gaming forum, expressing his dislike of certain game features and tactics. Another user disagreed with him in the forum, then searched for the boy’s information online and posted his address, email address, and social media links in another comment. The boy then received multiple emails and messages from strangers threatening to come to his home and assault him, and to block him from games.

Warning Signs for Bullying

There are many warning signs that may indicate that someone is affected by bullying—either being bullied or bullying others. Recognizing the warning signs is an important first step in taking action against bullying. Not all children who are bullied or are bullying others ask for help.

It is important to talk with children who show signs of being bullied or bullying others. These warning signs can also point to other issues or problems, such as depression or substance abuse. Talking to the child can help identify the root of the problem.

Signs a Child Is Being Bullied

Look for changes in the child. However, be aware that not all children who are bullied exhibit warning signs.

Some signs that may point to a bullying problem are: 

• Unexplainable injuries
• Lost or destroyed clothing, books, electronics, or jewelry
• Frequent headaches or stomach aches, feeling sick or faking illness
• Changes in eating habits, like suddenly skipping meals or binge eating. Kids may come home from school hungry because they did not eat lunch.
• Difficulty sleeping or frequent nightmares
• Declining grades, loss of interest in schoolwork, or not wanting to go to school
• Sudden loss of friends or avoidance of social situations
• Feelings of helplessness or decreased self esteem
• Self-destructive behaviors such as running away from home, harming themselves, or talking about suicide

If you know someone in serious distress or danger, don’t ignore the problem. Get help right away.

Signs a Child is Bullying Others

Kids may be bullying others if they:   

• Get into physical or verbal fights
• Have friends who bully others
• Are increasingly aggressive
• Get sent to the principal’s office or to detention frequently
• Have unexplained extra money or new belongings
• Blame others for their problems
• Don’t accept responsibility for their actions
• Are competitive and worry about their reputation or popularity

Why don't kids ask for help?

An adult was notified in less than half (40%) of bullying incidents. Kids don’t tell adults for many reasons:

• Bullying can make a child feel helpless. Kids may want to handle it on their own to feel in control again. They may fear being seen as weak or a tattletale.
• Kids may fear backlash from the kid who bullied them.
• Bullying can be a humiliating experience. Kids may not want adults to know what is being said about them, whether true or false. They may also fear that adults will judge them or punish them for being weak.
• Kids who are bullied may already feel socially isolated. They may feel like no one cares or could understand.
• Kids may fear being rejected by their peers. Friends can help protect kids from bullying, and kids can fear losing this support.

Tips to Help Stop Cyberbullying

For kids and teens

Know that it’s not your fault. What people call “bullying” is sometimes an argument between two people. But if someone is repeatedly cruel to you, that’s bullying and you mustn’t blame yourself. No one deserves to be treated cruelly.

Don’t respond or retaliate. Sometimes a reaction is exactly what aggressors are looking for because they think it gives them power over you, and you don’t want to empower a bully. As for retaliating, getting back at a bully turns you into one – and can turn one mean act into a chain reaction. If you can, remove yourself from the situation. If you can’t, sometimes humor disarms or distracts a person from bullying.

Save the evidence. The only good news about bullying online or on phones is that it can usually be captured, saved, and shown to someone who can help. You can save that evidence in case things escalate. [Visit ConnectSafely.org/cyberbullying for instructions on how to capture screens on phones and computers.]

Tell the person to stop. This is completely up to you – don’t do it if you don’t feel totally comfortable doing it, because you need to make your position completely clear that you will not stand for this treatment any more. You may need to practice beforehand with someone you trust, like a parent or good friend.

Reach out for help – especially if the behavior’s really getting to you. You deserve backup. See if there’s someone who can listen, help you process what’s going on and work through it – a friend, relative or maybe an adult you trust.

Use available tech tools. Most social media apps and services allow you to block the person. Whether the harassment’s in an app, texting, comments or tagged photos, do yourself a favor and block the person. You can also report the problem to the service. That probably won’t end it, but you don’t need the harassment in your face, and you’ll be less tempted to respond. If you’re getting threats of physical harm, you should call your local police (with a parent or guardian’s help) and consider reporting it to school authorities.

Protect your accounts. Don’t share your passwords with anyone – even your closest friends, who may not be close forever – and password-protect your phone so no one can use it to impersonate you. You’ll find advice at passwords.connectsafely.org.

If someone you know is being bullied, take action. Just standing by can empower an aggressor and does nothing to help. The best thing you can do is try to stop the bullying by taking a stand against it. If you can’t stop it, support the person being bullied. If the person’s a friend, you can listen and see how to help. Consider together whether you should report the bullying. If you’re not already friends, even a kind word can help reduce the pain. At the very least, help by not passing along a mean message and not giving positive attention to the person doing the bullying.

Additional advice for parents

Know that you’re lucky if your child asks for help. Most young people don’t tell their parents about bullying online or offline. So if your child’s losing sleep or doesn’t want to go to school or seems agitated when on his or her computer or phone, ask why as calmly and open-heartedly as possible. Feel free to ask if it has anything to do with mean behavior or social issues. But even if it does, don’t assume it’s bullying. You won’t know until you get the full story, starting with your child’s perspective.

Work with your child. There are two reasons why you’ll want to keep your child involved. Bullying and cyberbullying usually involve a loss of dignity or control over a social situation, and involving your child in finding solutions helps him or her regain that. The second reason is about context. Because the bullying is almost always related to school life and our kids understand the situation and context better than parents ever can, their perspective is key to getting to the bottom of the situation and working out a solution. You may need to have private conversations with others, but let your child know if you do, and report back. This is about your child’s life, so your child needs to be part of the solution.

Respond thoughtfully, not fast. What parents don’t always know is that they can make things worse for their kids if they act rashly. A lot of cyberbullying involves somebody getting marginalized (put down and excluded), which the bully thinks increases his or her power or status. If you respond publicly or if your child’s peers find out about even a discreet meeting with school authorities, the marginalization can get worse, which is why any response needs to be well thought out.

More than one perspective needed. Your child’s account of what happened is likely completely sincere, but remember that one person’s truth isn’t necessarily everybody’s. You’ll need to get other perspectives and be open-minded about what they are. Sometimes kids let themselves get pulled into chain reactions, and often what we see online is only one side of or part of the story.

What victims say helps most is to be heard – really listened to – either by a friend or

an adult who cares. That’s why, if your kids come to you for help, it’s so important to respond thoughtfully and involve them. Just by being heard respectfully, a child is often well on the way to healing.

The ultimate goal is restored self-respect and greater resilience in your child. This, not getting someone punished, is the best focus for resolving the problem and helping your child heal. What your child needs most is to regain a sense of dignity. Sometimes that means standing up to the bully, sometimes not. Together, you and your child can figure out how to get there.

One positive outcome we don’t often think about (or hear in the news) is resilience. We know the human race will never completely eradicate meanness or cruelty, and we also know that bullying is not, as heard in past generations, “normal” or a rite of passage. We need to keep working to eradicate it. But when it does happen and we overcome it – our resilience grows. It’s not something that can be “downloaded” or taught. We grow it through exposure to challenges and figuring out how to deal with them. So sometimes it’s important to give them space to do that and let them know we have their back.

Educate yourself

To prevent cyberbullying from occurring you must understand exactly what it is. Research what constitutes cyberbullying, as well as how and where it is most likely to occur. Talk to your friends about what they are seeing and experiencing.

Protect your password

Safeguard your password and other private information from prying eyes. Never leave passwords or other identifying information where others can see it. Also, never give out this information to anyone, even your best friend. If others know it, take the time to change it now!

Keep photos

Never open unidentified or unsolicited messages

Never open messages (emails, text messages, Facebook messages, etc.) from people you don’t know, or from known bullies. Delete them without reading. They could contain viruses that automatically infect your device if opened. Also never click on links to pages that are sent from someone you don’t know. These too could contain a virus designed to collect your personal or private information.

Log out of online accounts

Dont save passwords in form fields within web sites or your web browser for convenience, and dont stay logged in when you walk away from the computer or cell phone.

Dont give anyone even the slightest chance to pose as you online through your device. If you forget to log out of Facebook when using the computer at the library, the next person who uses that computer could get into your account and cause significant problems for you.

Pause before you post

Do not post anything that may compromise your reputation. People will judge you based on how you appear to them online. They will also give or deny you opportunities (jobs, scholarships, internships) based on this.

Raise awareness

Start a movement, create a club, build a campaign, or host an event to bring awareness to cyberbullying. While you may understand what it is, it’ s not until others are aware of it too that we can truly prevent it from occurring.

Setup privacy controls

Restrict access of your online profile to trusted friends only. Most social networking sites like Facebook and Google + offer you the ability to share certain information with friends only, but these settings must be configured in ordered to ensure maximum protection.

“Google ”yourself

Regularly search your name in every major search engine (e.g., Google, Bing, Yahoo). If any personal information or photo comes up which may be used by cyberbullies to target you, take action to have it removed before it becomes a problem.

Dont be a cyberbully yourself

Treat others how you would want to be treated. By being a jerk to others online, you are reinforcing the idea that the behavior is acceptable. Preventing Cyberbullying Top Ten

Don't respond.

1. Don't respond. If someone bullies you, remember that your reaction is usually exactly what the bully wants. ...
2. Don't retaliate. ...
3. Save the evidence. ...
4. Talk to a trusted adult. ...
5. Block the bully. ...
6. Be civil. ...
7. Don't be a bully. ...
8. Be a friend, not a bystander.

HOW PARENTS CAN PREVENT CYBER BULLYING

• Promote self-esteem and confidence. Encourage them to find activities they enjoy and develop skills to be proud of. Confident kids are less likely to be picked on, and they're also better able to shrug off bullying if it does happen
• Let them know it's okay to confide in you. Kids need to know that they can tell you anything – good or bad – and you won't over react.  
• Practice parental monitoring. Know where and when kids are going online, so you can avoid potential trouble.
• Limit screen time. Maximize your child's time with real-life friends and family members instead.
• Watch their friends list. Know who is on your child's social networking buddy list and how they know each person. Are they really friends with each of these people?
• Know what's going on at school. Cyberbullying rarely happens in a vacuum. It usually happens in combination with in-person bullying at school. Establish rapport with your child's teachers, principals, and guidance counselor.
• Teach kids never to give out their passwords. Unauthorized people who can access your child's accounts can do major damage.
• Share personal information in person, not online. Teach kids never to post personal information that can be used to identify them or tell bullies how to contact them in other ways (i.e: phone numbers, email addresses, etc.) Texts or posts can be forwarded to others without your permission.
• Teach kids how to block and report cyberbullies. Familiarize yourself (and your children) with the “block” feature on the various social networks they use, and learn how to report someone who harasses them online.
• Teach them to ignore cyberbullying. Kids should never, ever respond to a cyberbully, especially trying to retaliate by doing something

What can schools do to prevent cyberbullying?

Schools can't prevent cyberbullying any more than they can prevent regular bullying. Kids who want to bully will find a way. But schools can encourage tolerance, respect, and conflict resolution. Many schools have programs to give students a code of conduct, a safe environment in which to discuss their feelings, and a shared vocabulary that fosters empathy.

Beyond that, many schools are working to promote digital citizenship, online respect and responsibility, and consequences for misuse that involve education and re-direction rather than simple punitive actions. The ideal model is a school that incorporates digital citizenship lessons into the school day.

A few other things schools can do to help prevent cyberbullying:

• Start from the ground up. Build a community that rewards kindness and compassion, not only academic or athletic achievement.
• Use the Internet in lesson plans. Schools can use social networks and other digital tools within the context of the curriculum (for example, an online tool on which all students must collaborate) to teach students how to use the Internet respectfully and productively.
• Teach digital citizenship. Schools can implement digital citizenship programs that encourage students to work together to understand the importance and power of online tools -- and the responsibility that comes with using them.

  Cyberbullying Effects. Like all forms of bullying, cyberbullying causes psychological, emotional and physical stress. Each person's response to being bullied is unique, but research has shown some general tendencies. StopBullying.gov reports that youth who are bullied have a higher risk of depression and anxiety.When it comes to cyberbullying, they are often motivated by anger, revenge or frustration. Sometimes they do it for entertainment or because they are bored and have too much time on their hands and too many tech toys available to them. Many do it for laughs or to get a reaction.

• If you or someone you know is being cyberbullied, there things you can do to address the problem.Talk to a trusted person to figure out the best ways to deal with the problem. Help can come from a family member, friend or another adult, such as a teacher. Sometimes, talking to a counselor or health professional, at school or elsewhere, can help you get through the emotional effects of bullying.
• Do not respond to cyberbullying or try to retaliate. Sometimes people post or text teasing or name-calling to get a reaction.
• Don’t pass it on. If someone has posted or sent a message that could be hurtful to others, refuse to pass it along. Speak up against bullying. It’s as simple as saying “Stop.”
• Keep evidence of cyberbullying. Record the dates, times and descriptions. Save and print screenshots, emails, and text messages.
• Block the person who is cyberbullying you. Many websites and phone companies let you block people. Also, cyberbullying may violate the “Terms and Conditions” of these services. Consider contacting the service provider to file a complaint.
• Report the incident to your school. *They may be able to help you resolve the cyberbullying or be watchful for face-to-face bullying.

StopBullying.gov offers these reminders:

• You are not alone. Talk to someone you trust. Getting an adult’s help is a good way to stop bullying.
• It is not your fault. Nobody should be bullied!
• Do not hurt yourself.
• Do not bully back. Do not bully anyone else.
• Do not let the bully win. Keep doing what you love to do.

Always think carefully about what you are going to post or say online. Don’t share secrets, photos or anything that might be embarrassing to you or others if it fell into the wrong hands. Remember: You don’t have complete control over what others forward or post.

Set privacy settings on your accounts. Make sure that you’re only sharing information with people you know and trust. Pay attention to notices from social networks, because sometimes privacy settings change.

Do a search of your name. Profiles you created in the past may be sharing your personal information. Any information you posted about yourself on a Web page (blogs, forums, free services, groups, etc.), may be publicly available if privacy settings were overlooked at the time, or changed later without your knowledge.

To do a search for yourself, use quotes around your name, like “Johnny Appleseed.” Also search for your email address, nicknames, blog names or other information. By doing this, you can see what’s publicly available about you and fix it if necessary. Note: Try these same searches in “Images” to see what’s readily available there as well.