The curse of the middle-manager: How to handle being pulled in every direction and everyone wanting something from you

I work with a lot of managers – from first-time managers to experienced senior executives. I’ve also had several management and leadership roles myself. And there is no doubt in my mind that the toughest gig is that of the middle manager.

Not quite at the top of the tree in management terms, and not one of the troops – middle management can be a bit of a no-man’s land (or no-woman’s land  ).

When they’re working at their best, middle managers can be the oil that greases the wheel of organisational performance. At their worst, they can be a permafrost – causing or exacerbating friction between staff and board-level leadership.

When I develop managers – whether through coaching, mentoring or training – the biggest thing I find is that they feel overwhelmed. Primarily because they’re getting pressure from so many different directions. Whether it's a last-minute request from the chief executive, or a team member needing urgent help, or an angry customer wanting to "speak to the manager" etc. etc. etc.

But the more we get pulled in every direction and the less time we have not only to do our own work but to look after ourselves, the less helpful and compassionate we're likely to be to those around us, particularly our teams. And this can spill over into our personal lives as well, with conflict between work life and family life putting pressure on relationships.

So, how can you stop the deluge of requests and pulls on your time? These tips will hopefully help:

Know your priorities

Too many managers I work with are at the mercy of other people’s priorities and emergencies. Add to this a tendency to allow vacuums of time to become filled with any old thing and you're well on the way to stress and overwhelm.

One approach that I used when I was a middle manager was having three themes – ‘People’, ‘Strategy’ and ‘Operations’. I then brain dumped every single thing I needed to do and put them under the relevant headings. Then it was a case of assigning priority levels to these. See a previous post to help you do this.

Then, on a weekly basis, I’d identify the top priorities for the coming week and schedule in the work to do in my diary. This made it far less likely that my diary would be dominated by meetings, which are a huge drain on manager time. For example, a joint project between the London School of Economics, Columbia and Harvard Universities examined how CEOs spend their time. In one of the studies, researchers found that 60% of CEOs' working hours and 56% of corporate leaders' working hours were spent in meetings, and these figures didn't include conference calls! The impact of unnecessary and badly run meetings on manager productivity and well-being can be terrible.

The other important thing here is to allocate enough time to do whatever the task is - not too little time and not too much time. Research by Judith Bryan and Edwin Locke looked at what happened when people were given too much time to complete a task. College students were asked to complete a fixed set of very simple math problems. Some participants were assigned to the 'excess time' condition and others were put in a condition where they had just the 'right' amount of time for the problems.Those in the excess condition took significantly longer to complete the problems. The findings suggest that those who had more time than they needed put in less effort and felt less urgency to complete their tasks quickly.

Know yourself

I really don’t think you can be a successful manager in today’s world without having a good level of self-awareness and a support team. That means:

1) 360-degree feedback to assess how other people see you

Researchers from Alabama State University looked at patterns in leadership emergence and leadership effectiveness of people with psychopathic tendencies. They suggested, as well as screening effectively at interview, that 360-degree feedback was another valuable approach. Talking with a person’s peers, subordinates, and supervisors offers greater insight about a person’s leadership style and personality, rather than basing promotions and management decisions on quarterly reports and numbers.

Speak to your HR team or manager to see if your organisation has 360 in place. If not, you can do it yourself in conjunction with your manager by asking ‘What do I do well?’, ‘What do I do less well?’ and ‘What do I need to start doing differently?’If you have a coach or mentor then you could do the 360 with them, which is an approach I’ve taken with some management clients.

2) Get a coach and/or a mentor

I’ve said this so many times in other posts but you know what? I’m going to say it again. A coach or mentor can be invaluable for middle managers in particular. They can help you identify and work through blind spots and behaviour that see you getting in your own way. More than anything it can be akin to an oxygen tank – a place where you can breathe, think and come out re-energised and re-focused.

A recent study, published in the International Coaching Psychology Review, looked at how coaches can better support managers and leaders experiencing stress. The researchers identified indicators that can help coaches detect and interpret stress in executives, despite possible self-deception and impression management by the coachee. The researchers identified five indicators which suggest senior executive stress:

• Appearance (e.g. sleep patterns, eating habits/weight control, exercise, energy levels, hypertension)
• Performance (e.g. ability to take decisions, concentration and memory, innovation capability, generating new ideas)
• Growth and self-development (e.g. satisfaction with opportunities for personal growth and learning - too much? not enough?)
• Affect management (e.g. ability to feel, understand, control and show emotions appropriately)
• Relationships (e.g. perceived quantity and quality of relationships with life partner, family, friends and with professional peers and superior).

I know that some middle managers find it difficult to convince their boss to find the money for a coach. This is particularly the case with some of my public sector clients. This report by Jack Phillips and Patricia Phillips is a really useful look at return on investment of coaching and how to calculate it.

3) Join an action learning set

Think of this as a form of coaching, albeit with a group of six or so other managers. Reg Revans, who developed the action learning set approach in the 1940s, said that those in the sets were "comrades in adversity". And without a doubt, feeling less alone is the number one factor to come out each time I evaluate the impact of action learning sets.

Most action learning sets are facilitated (or at least start off with a facilitator). One action learning set I’m working with are now ready to go it alone. They’ve learned the action learning process and can continue to work together, jointly solving management problems in a safe, non-judgemental environment.

Know your staff

It never fails to surprise me when I come across some managers who really know very little, if anything, about their staff. Yet, in order to know who to push back on and how to push back, you need to understand what motivates and demotivates each individual.

For example, you might have a member of staff who needs to check absolutely everything with you before taking action. This will be adding to your already pressurised diary and time. To push back and change their behaviour, you need to take the the time to understand more about them. What is important to them? What worries them most at work? What kind of work do they like? Not like? etc. Only by taking the time to understand this, can you hope to help them break some of the unhelpful ways of working.

There is also a link between this and your own behaviour. You might, just might, be exhibiting micromanagement behaviours which is having a knock-on effect on your team. For example, researchers from the University of Melbourne conducted a meta-analysis of more than 30,000 employees worldwide and found the following practices were the most effective for managers:

• Providing opportunities for employees to make their own choices and have inputs into decisions.
• Encouraging self-initiated behaviors within structured guidance and boundaries.
• Showing an interest in the perspective of employees, demonstrating empathic concern.
• Encouraging ownership over goals, and interest and value in work tasks by clearly articulating a rationale about why those tasks are important.
• Avoiding the use of controls that restrain autonomy, like overtly controlling behavior (e.g. micro-management), or tangible sanctions or rewards to prompt desired job behaviors.

As well as individuals, developing an understanding of the team as a whole is also important. Things like team building can be a great way to develop helpful ways of working. It’s an opportunity to share what’s important to you and how you like to work, as well as hear from your team about how to get the best out of them. But remember, not all team-building interventions are made equal.

Researchers from the University of British Columbia examined 51 studies involving almost 8,500 participants exploring impact of interventions on improving teamwork and team performance. They categorised interventions into four distinct areas:

1) Education in a classroom-type setting

2) Interactive workshop style format

3) Simulation training

4) Reviews in-situ.

While the researchers found all four methods to be effective, classroom education was not found to be an effective way to improve teamwork as it was seen as too passive. Those interventions which included experiential, more active ways of learning, were found to have a positive impact on teamwork. Additionally, the study found that interventions were more effective when the focus was on more than one dimension of teamwork. For example, if a team was exploring how they communicated with each other, a facilitator could include activities around goal-setting, giving feedback, developing learning strategies etc.

Know your boss

Not managing upwards is another big issue that can impact middle managers.

The same rules apply as for knowing your staff. Find out what’s important to your boss, how they like things done, what quality means to them.

I’ve seen some managers move from one boss to another but not change their approach. They continue to work in the way their previous boss liked, not realising that their new boss likes to work in a completely different way.

If you’ve got a new boss, or even if you’ve worked with yours for a while, it can be really helpful to have a discussion about how you each like to work. Getting clarity on ‘the rules’ is important if you’re to manage your time and workload effectively.

If your boss is a micromanager, which is one of the things causing your excessive workload and stress, then check out this Harvard Business Review article offers some great tips. And you might find this post helpful, which looks at what you can do when your boss says everything is a priority

Amplify understanding and ask questions

Failure to communicate clearly can impact a middle manager’s time and workload. By assuming understanding (your own, your staff) you may end up going down the wrong path. This can lead to re-work, duplication of effort, late delivery etc.

Asking questions is essential.

As is playing back what has been heard. Whether that’s you playing back to the requester (e.g. your boss) what you’ve understood they’re asking for; or whether you ask a member of staff to play back to you what they’ve understood you’ve asked them to do.

Spending a bit of time upfront clarifying understanding can save you time down the road. I've created a helpful checklist to help you clarify expectations. Download it for free here.

I hope you found this article helpful. What are your top tips for managing overwhelm?

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You may also be interested in my previous LinkedIn article Practice what you preach because as a leader you are always being watched. Always.

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