A thought on 'unemployment'

This is me. And my Dad. Some 28 years ago.

A few years after this photo was taken – he took his own life, and in fact, today is that moment in time’s anniversary. Every few years on this day, or his birthday, there is a reason I feel compelled to share a picture, a memory or a moment and talk about this. And him.

Often, it’s been about reducing the awful stigma that’s still associated with mental health, or about making sure his legacy isn’t lost to time, itself. Because I am incredibly proud of who my Dad was, what he achieved and the impact he had on who I am, today.

This morning, I came across this photo of he and I in my emails as I sat in a café, preparing an application for a new role that I’m really excited and energised by.

And it got me thinking about employment, or more relevant, – unemployment.

When my Dad passed away, he was unemployed despite his brilliant mind and talent – and he found it really, really tough. The stigma associated with this and the challenge it created when applying for roles at all levels of the employee pyramid – too qualified, a little under qualified, only partially the right fit, or you’ve been out of work too long, they’d say.? This, alongside the self-undulating pressure of providing for your family (thankfully now the gendered lens of roles in the family is waning).

The notion of rejection was a lot to handle, I can only imagine. Let alone being at a family function, a social gathering, or anywhere really – only to be asked what you do.? “I’m unemployed” or “Not working” was a lot to say then, and seemingly, it still is, for those experiencing it, and those hearing it as well. And it shouldn’t be this way.

In late 2022, I jumped at the opportunity to be Deputy CEO at a wonderful international aid and justice organisation for a year – while the incumbent was on maternity leave. To learn, grow and be challenged, it was a role not to be missed. From the outset, I decided I would take a small amount of time off when my time there came to an end late last year – planned, budgeted for and much-needed, while I figured out what was next.

It’s a moment I’m grateful for and one I don’t take for granted, as I know not everyone is in a position to have this time. Interestingly though, I’ve found the commentary hasn’t changed in some 25+ years – and in some cases, the reactions of others hasn’t too. It’s been suggested to me I shouldn’t tell people I’m “unemployed”, or say “I’m in between work/roles” for fear of what this might represent – well intentioned advice, but perhaps misguided. Or, the knowing look given unconsciously too, when you mention you are on a “break, a sabbatical” or simply, “not working” is one I’ve found equally peculiar.

For me, saying any or all of these statements only represents good things – I’m rested, my wellbeing is good and I’m focused on the future, ready to do good work with people and places I care about as my career journey continues – a journey I’m very proud of, so far.

That won’t be where everyone is at, I know, and much of what I say comes from a place of privilege – so what must it be like to be without employment without intention and in need of work but suffer this same reaction? It’s certainly not shameful, or deserving of stigma and judgement – its often the card that one’s been dealt, and a situation many people find themselves in.

Everyone on their employment journey is deserving of dignity and respect, an open-mind, a hand up, and opportunity, should they seek it.? It’s the very fabric of a good, and prosperous society.

I’ve thought about my Dad a lot recently, and what it must have been like to live through this, and the all-consuming challenges of mental health. Unrelenting, perhaps. I’ll never be not proud of him – but for a second or two, I wonder what might have been of the moments in time missed for us both, milestones big and small.

For someone to say “hold tight, you're slowly coming back to life, I'll be keeping your head up,” when “I’m unemployed” was the response would have been incredibly powerful for him, back then.

I’m really proud of having built a career that’s based around partnering with and lifting up others so everyone gets the chance to get ahead and live a good life. I would have wanted that for my Dad, and I want it for anyone who’s fallen on rough times, too.

So, I can’t wait for what’s next.

Alan

(Currently unemployed and between roles)