Cup of Coffee: Save that Frog!

Anita: “You have changed a lot; I am no longer a priority for you.”

Akash: “Can you say something new; I am hearing this same statement over the last 6 months. Do you even have the slightest idea how much stressed I am everyday due to work pressure and on top of that you and your stupid comments.”

Anita: Listen Akash, Even I work and I work more than you! I work in office in the similar environment and then at home taking care of the whole household including your irritating parents whose demands never end. I am tired and sick of this; I wish I could have taken some time to think before marrying you. I so regret this.

Akash: Stop dragging my parents in this one, even I am regretting this decision, I was independent enough before and could do whatever I wanted to

Most of my clients come up with a similar situation where they are just fed up being in that relation and over a period of time the relation has turned completely sour

I am sure that you have heard the story of the frog and the boiling water, it’s used in the context for change management; let’s look at the same story with a different angle

If you put the frog in a vessel with water and start to heat the water, the frog starts adjusting with the water temperature as it keeps rising, it keeps on adjusting to the rising water temperature till comes a stage when it can no longer adjust and tries jumping out of the water and fails and eventually dies

The same is with our relations as well, we are all like the frog and the water, sometimes the husband is the frog and sometimes the wife is. We are all born different but what happens is we start adjusting to the other person’s nature and habits and similar to the frog situation we adjust till we can’t adjust anymore and eventually the relation dies.

Think about this for a moment, when we get in a relation, we accept the person the way they are and everything is fine, because the frog is ok in the cold water and the water cannot boil on its own, its slowly and gradually due to external factors the water starts heating and then boiling leading to the death of the frog which is relation in this case.

Over a period of time, technology has put us a little behind in our relationship values. Needless to say that we are more busier working than our previous generation putting everything at stake including our relations and health

External factors work like the heat which is boiling the water, but the water doesn’t boil all of a sudden, the temperature slowly rises and eventually it starts boiling and if the frog doesn’t come out before the water boils it will die!

I want to highlight the small scene inspired from the recent movie Jai Gangajal, where Priyanka Chopra makes her junior understand that these politicians and the goons are only using him for their benefit and the moment they don’t find him useful they will kick him out, his loyalty towards the politicians is of no use.  Today most of them are behaving like this puppet at the hands of someone trying to prove their loyalty, which is either manipulating or making them slog like a donkey

People will forget you the moment you leave the firm, the one who won’t forget you are your family and your friends that always support you and stand by your side.  

Save those relations before they remain just on social media as a reminder that they exist!

If you see yourself in the similar situation, there is one great solution that I have applied with many clients and it works with 100% guarantee. The frog is a metaphor for the relation and the frog has the capability to jump out of the water and out the heat off. So how does the water calm down allowing the frog to survive again and let it float in cold water again

The solution is:

A cup of coffee!

When was the last time you actually sat with your loved one over a cup of coffee in some coffee shop!

While a great element for a successful relation is Loyalty towards each other, I have a different version of loyalty.

Loyalty means one thing! To be there when the other needs you the most!  The number one element essential to be loyal to each other is to be able to listen to each other without any prejudices.

When was the last time you both were in a coffee shop listening to each other?

We are all stressed out in today’s life, we don’t have time, we are too overworked, we are chasing deadlines, we are saving our job, the reasons could be many but I want to ask you one question! What matters more? Work or relations!

If you want to save that frog, time to jump is now, call that one person, set up the time and meet them over a coffee and see the results for yourself! Those 30 minutes will not hamper your work and remember one thing every great relation starts with you. Add some sugar to the bitterness and see miracles happening now!

How to have great Relationship!

Do this periodic check for yourself and plan that coffee now!