Cultivating Trust for Effective Purposeful Partnerships

The word Trust has been coming up a lot recently.

For example, this 40-second commercial from IBM popped up: "Before you use AI to transform business, accelerate growth, predict trends, you need to begin with trust." The commercial goes on to show software to help scale AI responsibly and ends by saying "Let’s create AI that begins with trust." While I agreed with the message, ironically also felt a lack of trust for the commercial as it seemed too polished, not quite authentic, and made me wonder if watsonx.governance as a software could really help people scale responsibly.

In thinking about purposeful partnerships, cultivating trust is an essential element for creating effective, long-term relationships for amplifying positive impact. In this article, I'll explore what trust means, why trust matters for purposeful partnerships, and how to cultivate trust.

What is Trust?

In going through the Positive Intelligence? & Relationships Coaching program by Shirzad Chamine , he mentions that "Trust is an emotion" and also describes how when you have a "Pleaser" saboteur, you are constantly trying to please others and it actually causes them to trust you less because you are not saying the tough, honest truths that may not be so pleasing to them but will show that you are being real. How much trust do you feel for someone who is always putting on a happy face, even under terrible circumstances or when you know they're not feeling happy?

Academic leaders and authors Aneil Mishra and Dr. Karen Mishra most recent book, Intentional Leadership: Becoming a Trustworthy Leaders* published in 2022, follows years of research and other books on trust, including Restoring Trust In Higher Education: Making the Investment Worthwhile Again* and Trust is Everything: Become The Leader Others Will Follow*. They describe examples and methods to build the "ROCC of Trust (be reliable, open and honest, competent, and compassionate)" and offer a framework for leaders to grow individually, empower their teams, and develop more effective organizations.

Being reliable means doing what you say you will do (it's better to under-promise and over-deliver than it is to over-promise and under-deliver). Saying what is true, demonstrating skill, and caring for others are all part of becoming trustworthy.

Given these definitions of trust (as an emotion, as well as a set of behaviors -- I feel trust for you, and I'm showing up in a way that is trustworthy), I'd like to dive into why trust is important for purposeful partnerships.

Why Does Trust Matter?

A partnership cannot be a partnership, much less a purposeful partnership, without a foundation of trust. When you break trust, your partnerships will break. When you cultivate trust, your partnerships will thrive. If you do not feel trust for a potential partner, then you will not move forward with that partnership (and they will not move forward with you if they do not trust you).

When you trust you partners, and they act in ways that continue to maintain and grow your trust, then you will give them more latitude and be more transparent with them, which in turn will allow them to be more effective. If you do not trust your partners, you might keep a short leash and try to micro-manage them, which limits their potential and often leads to push back and unhealthy conflict, or they simply walk away from the relationship because they recognize the lack of trust.

Trust matters because it allows you to have open dialogue with your partners and be able to solve problems more quickly and achieve your goals together. Furthermore, if you're aiming to make positive impact, yet you do not trust other people to help you get there, then it is likely that your journey will be long, lonely, and detrimental to yourself and others rather than purposeful.

Instead, build a foundation based on positive elements (such as trust, authenticity, kindness, generosity, accountability, inclusion, empathy, a growth mindset and more), which will allow for purposeful partnerships to come together in a better, more sustainable way. The analogy of building a house on sand comes to mind; negative elements shift your relationships like sand, while positive elements create the rock solid base that allows a castle (your mission-driven initiative) to last for centuries to come.

People will congregate around initiatives and organizations that have developed enduring trust, and they will crumble when trust dissolves.

How Do You Cultivate Trust?

Trust takes time and repeated signals. Like a layered cake, it requires patience and consistency -- and the recipe may improve over time as you practice creating it, nurturing it, tasting it and sharing it.

The first time you meet a potential partner, there may not be any trust or even a level of mistrust. I personally tend to give trust early on (assuming positive intent), until the trust is broken. I've also learned that it's helpful to surround myself with people who do not give trust easily, as they can help me be more discerning and move away more quickly from people who do not behave in a trustworthy manner.

Furthermore, I've learned that sometimes I have not always acted in a trustworthy manner. It takes time, energy, an improving mindset, and adjusted actions to repair mistrust, create initial trust, as well as build upon growing trust. A few thoughts on how to cultivate trust when you're growing purposeful partnerships:

1. Ask for forgiveness (if you've done something wrong, acknowledge it) AND don't do it again.
2. Ask for help not to do it again (sometimes it's hard to break bad habits, and accepting others' feedback and adjusting your behavior may require multiple attempts and corrections).
3. Get to know the people in you current and prospective partnerships, what matters to them and who they really are, before jumping to conclusions and judgements. Spend time being curious about learning about their needs and motivations; if you rush too quickly into sales mode or only push your own agenda, then you'll have difficulty gaining trust.
4. Be giving and forgiving, while also keeping each other accountable. We all make mistakes and can grow from them. At the same time, let's stop fooling others and getting fooled. Figure out when it's time to say enough is enough, and either help each other break old patterns or leave the playing field.
5. Become better with your follow-through, keep your promises, excel in your delivery, demonstrate empathy, and do it over and over again. Keep working your trust muscle, so that you can give more of it and get more of it in your pursuit of purposeful partnerships.

Think about what trust means to you, why it matters, and how you are cultivating trust in the partnerships that you're building. When has a partner broken your trust, and how did you handle it?

How might you handle similar situations differently in the future, to repair mistrust and develop a stronger foundation so that you can better achieve your purpose together?

Please share your thoughts about trust in the comments below!

As a Founder, Head of Strategic Partnerships and Marketing, Janice Dru-Bennett helps customers and partners improve employee experience, disseminate knowledge, promote health & wellbeing, drive effective leadership and stimulate team growth. She thrives on developing marketing channels, creating and nurturing a global ecosystem of alliances that drive value for companies, organizations, and their people.

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Photo Credits from above: Image from IBM: Let's create AI that begins with trust video [screenshot at 0:11], Vinicius "amnx" Amano on Unsplash [Smiling woman with yellow phone], Book covers from Amazon links, Afif Ramdhasuma on Unsplash [Man and woman pointing fingers and yelling at each other], Mark Huigen on Unsplash [Empty path to mountains and cloudy sky], hoch3media on Unsplash [Buckingham Palace Changing of the Guard with many people surrounding it], Patryk Sikora on Unsplash [Frosted layered cake with fruit and other toppings], Boxed Water Is Better on Unsplash [Two people in workout gear with "Boxed Water is Better" containers]

*Affiliate link from Amazon