Cultivate the Character You Crave: A Guide to Ditching What Drags You Down

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As the saying goes, "You are what you eat." But what if we go a step farther with that? Your physical and mental development molds who you become. This holds true for the habits and qualities we cultivate in addition to making healthful decisions. Like weeds, our undesirable tendencies have the ability to spread and supplant the desirable qualities of ourselves.

Even from my old smoking buddies, the one question I get asked the most as a recovered addict is "how did you quit weed?" My initial reaction is usually that Jesus fixed me. However, it's a straightforward response, and it's always evident that they require more than just the direct answer, "Jesus" since they are not born again. Next, I quickly draw their attention to the three dimensions of deliverance. In 1 Thessalonians 5:23, it is written that "May God himself, the God of peace, sanctify you through and through. May your whole spirit, soul and body be kept blameless at the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ."

Take note of the three essential terms in Spirit, Body, and Soul. Each of those crucial regions needs to be sanctified, or set apart or better still cleansed. The spiritual side of things is around prayer and reading the Bible. The physical side of things is your body, which you should not contaminate by ingesting anything unhealthy. And lastly, your mind, which is your soul. It's critical that we take control of our thought process. Negative thoughts should not be entertained as they may lead you to give in to your body's desire for drugs or anything that is unhealthy. The apostle Paul exhorts believers to take command of their minds in Philippians 4:8. "Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."

That's good news, right? Like a garden, we can nurture the kind of character we want. Here's how to develop a thriving personality and starve your bad habits:

• Recognize Your Weeds: Identifying the behaviors and characteristics you wish to alter is the first step. Do you get angry easily? Do you put things off? Regarding the things, you wish to get better at, be sincere with yourself.
• Recognize the Triggers: What circumstances or feelings drive your negative behaviors? Breaking the automatic pattern can be facilitated by identifying the triggers. Stress may be the cause of unhealthy snacking. Determine what causes your stress and be prepared with a healthy coping strategy, such as going for a walk or deep breathing exercises.
• Feed the Positive, Starve the Negative: Often, quitting a negative habit is insufficient. It leaves a gap that is readily filled once more. Instead, swap out the bad action for a constructive one that satisfies a comparable need. Are you having restless feelings? Instead of biting your nails, use a stress ball or fidget toy. Do you yearn for social interaction? Participate in volunteer work or join a club as an alternative to binge-watching social media.
• The Key Is Self-Compassion: Setbacks are unavoidable and change requires time. If you find yourself reverting to old habits, don't be hard on yourself. Recognize your error, draw lessons from it, and recommit to your objectives. No matter how little your progress is, acknowledge it.
• Locate Your Support System: Be in the company of positive and uplifting individuals. A supportive person at your side can really make all the difference. If you need direction and inspiration, think about finding a mentor or joining a support group.

Recall that personal development is a process rather than a destination. You may develop the kind of character you really want by continuously focusing on your strengths and letting go of your weaknesses. Thus, begin "starving" your poor habits right now and see how your best self-destructs!