Criticism or Cynicism

Ok so I missed last week and I thought ‘no one would notice’, until one of my three readers sent me a snarky message asking ‘what happened to the latest post?’? I must admit I was surprised to get such an email and flattered as well.? But then I pondered, were they being critical or cynical?? I am not sure why my thoughts went there, maybe it was guilt, not because I let my loyal three reader fanbase down, but perhaps that I let myself down. Sure I can pat myself on the back and brag about the number of Newsletters I have posted since starting this thought experiment or because I had close to 500 views of my last article and 6 responses ;-).?

What it came down to was the story I wrote in my head, the story that starts with ‘a lot criticism comes from a place of cynicism'.? To be fair, I have heard it and experienced skepticism from colleagues regarding my lofty goals and ambitions, but I know I must keep an open mind to all critiques and not react, show my best poker face and absorb the input, digest it, let it swirl around in my gut and contemplate the possibilities. Other times it is rocket fuel for the fire.? At times I have found myself avoiding response from people and at the same time embrace it from others.? Which as I am writing this reminds me of a thought turned quote I jotted down years ago while in a difficult relationship; where the other person would use my honesty and my stories against me. In comparison, in the excellent film ‘Whiplash’, much in the way Fletcher uses Neiman’s family story against him. Anyway to cut to the chase: that quote I jotted down is as follows:

“Honesty is sacred, accept it with an open heart and mind” ?

Do with it what you will, but that concept was a game changer for me and set me on a path of brutal honesty in relationships and as best I could in business. Turns out it is more challenging in business than relationships, that’s where the inside voice comes in handy ‘if you have nothing good to say, say nothing’.? I am still practicing this, relative to caffeine intake so bear with me.? At the same time, I am A-Okay with being called out on it.? Like, Dude! That was harsh!

So where was I… I wrote the title to this piece well over a week ago in regards to sharing both my screenwriting - Yay, I had one request for a read, special thanks to Scott D for reading and giving me some solid notes.? I was also getting feedback on the ‘head’ and with each bit of feedback, my initial response was, and I kid you not, to read it out of the corner of my eye, then scoff. Yes I actually did that, insert rolling eyes here.? Then I waited a bit, maybe even a day and read through the responses again.? I know why I went through this process, but boy to be aware of it, was curious to experience. I assume I am not alone, hence my sharing.? So more importantly it turns out I initially misread the text on the first reading. It sounded much more harsh and almost cynical, maybe I need therapy,? what I discovered upon the second reading and digesting the info, was, WOW! That’s it?! This is a simple answer, response, fix, what have you.? The good news is some of the honesty was spot on and extremely helpful, other notes are and have been, okay… moving on. ?

Perhaps others out there in LinkedIn Land can relate and perhaps collectively we can internally rise above that initial response and move more fluidly into the zen-like peaceful zone, where we accept criticism with an open heart and mind and embrace the honesty of others, when, I reckon, their goal was to be helpful not cynical.

Whew. I got through that one unscathed.? Thanks for reading, if you have any thoughts please share: critical, complimentary and yes even cynical if you must. ?