CRIES OF JOY AND HORROR AS FACEBOOK CHANGES ITS FRIENDING POLICY TO “OPEN BORDERS”: all “Friends” requests from anyone must be accepted.

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Report:  Facebook Introduces New Policy for Friending Announcement by Zuckerberg that all “Friends” requests from anyone be accepted.  

Today, Facebook told reporters that, in order to make sure that the social media giant was a safe place for it to maximize its earnings, it vowed to act decisively to make it the “very safest space on the planet.

There is no place in our new world for walls, “said Zuckerberg, after emerging  from behind his security. “To not allow someone into your Facebook page, which is your home, is just building a wall, isn’t it”  Facebook is a leader and not a follower in creating this wonderful new world order,”  he added”

“This great social media space was built by generations” of people “friending” others,  Zuckerberg told reporters, “ and we cannot forget that tradition” upon which today’s great institution of “like-ing” of today was founded” 

The new policy will demand that anyone who request to friend a person will have to automatically be granted that request regardless of  someone knowing them prior to any such request or of what might appear in their profile.  “That would clearly be ‘profiling”, said a Facebook spokesman, “and we can’t have that, can we?”

As part of the new policy, those apparently listing as being from the nations associated with Terrorism in different parts of the world will automatically be given full scope to post whatever they wished on any friends’ page once that friending has been achieved.

Facebook users will be monitored, according to Facebook spokesperson, and be required to click “like” when any such person posted on their Page. “There is no room for hate in our world,” he said.

When asked about the possibility that a Facebook member might receive various obscene sexual or other posts and messages, the spokesperson explained that in order not to encourage further such obscene posts of photos being sent to members, “the best policy is just to “like” them, and they encourage all members to click “like” whenever a nasty, pornographic or otherwise abusive post or comment is made on their page or messaged to them.

As to those who sought to block or otherwise “report” having people in their page whom they did not know or of who they did not approve, Zuckerberg, while he wiped away some drool from his lips, stated that  the Facebook policy will that the digital media giant could not allow members who acted in such a bigoted fashion to spread their hate. 

As reporters questioned him further as to the consequences, he stared off into space following a mosquito in its flight. “They would have to bee silenced by either being suspended or banned from Facebook”,  he said just before his quickly grabbed one of the flying bugs and swallowed it.”  

A spokesman then terminated the press conference, saying there could be no more words from Mr. Zuckerberg