Creating a New Identity: Becoming a New Person Without Being a Fake or Losing Your Authenticity

“Chris has risen!” is what fills my timeline today, as many of my friends, customers and partners in Ukraine celebrate the Orthodox Christmas. Many had to leave their country in the past year, and some starting their life all over again, or their business. This is by no means an easy task, as you often not only have to reinvent your business, but also yourself.

Creating a new identity can seem like a daunting task that may lead to being insincere, but it is possible to create a new identity and become a new person without losing?your?authenticity. Identity is complex and multi-faceted and is formed by various factors like past experiences, feedback from others, and projections of the future from important people in our lives.

The Building Blocks of Identity

The following are the four basic building blocks of our identity:

1. Remembered Identity

Our remembered identity is formed by the intersection of our past experiences with ourselves. Memories shape our identity, and we use them to define who we are.?For example; I am a bad swimmer. Why? Because I tried swimming many times, and I am simply no good at it.

2. Reflected Identity

Our reflected identity is what others have told us about ourselves. Feedback from others can shape our identity, whether positive or negative.?For example; I am a bad listener. Why? Because some people have told me I am.

3. Programmed Identity

Our programmed identity is what important people in our lives have projected onto us for the future. It is the image they have of us and what they believe we will become.?For example; Aged 12, I made it into the Dutch national Under-13s hockey team to play in the World Cup. From the moment I started playing when I was 4 years old, my parents told me I was the best. The best skater. The best defenseman. The best goal scorer. As a child there was never a doubt in my mind I would be selected for the national team. I was programmed for it. But it is not always positive. Sometimes we are being told we are not good at something. You are a bad listener. You are not funny. You can’t dance. You can’t sing. We underestimate the impact this can have on the other person. I know I am guilty of this behavior, and I am ashamed for it.

4. Created Identity

Our created identity is the identity we create for ourselves. It is the identity we choose to adopt, regardless of our past experiences, feedback from others, or projections from important people in our lives. This identity is the most challenging to create but also the most liberating because it allows us to define ourselves on our terms.

Programming and Identity

Programming plays a critical role in shaping our identity. It can be positive or negative and can come from different sources, including family, friends, or society. Programming can limit our potential and prevent us from exploring different facets of our identity. It is essential to identify and challenge the programming that limits us and create new programming that empowers us.

Becoming a New Person

Becoming a new person requires a shift in our mindset and a willingness to explore new facets of our identity. To become a new person without being a hypocrite or a phony, one should:

●??????Challenge your programming: Identify the programming that limits you and challenge it. Ask yourself if it aligns with your values and goals. If it doesn't, create new programming that empowers you.

●??????Embrace your created identity: Define who you are on your terms and create a new identity that aligns with your values and goals.

●??????Explore new experiences: Step outside your comfort zone and explore new experiences that can help you discover new facets of your identity.

●??????Be authentic: Stay true to yourself and be authentic in your journey to becoming a new person.

In conclusion, creating a new identity and becoming a new person may seem like an impossible task that may lead to being insincere. However, by embracing your created identity, exploring new experiences, and challenging your programming, it is possible to become a?real and authentic?new.

Happy Easter everyone!

Morten Kriek is the founder of?Wisselbanck ?? , co-founder of?The Banking 50 , and holds a Masters Degree in Positive Leadership and Strategy from?IE Business School ?in Madrid. He also completed on-campus executive programs at some of the world's leading business schools including?Columbia Business School ,?Yale School of Management ,?The Tuck School of Business at Dartmouth ?and?Cornell Johnson Graduate School of Management . Morten is also a certified Positive Psychology Coach from the?Wholebeing Institute .