Wondering "WHO AM I?"

Have you ever wanted to write a book, start a business or invent a product, but thought, "Who am I to do this? I'm not an expert. What do I know? What if it's no good?"

If so, you're not alone. You're in the Creator's Conundrum. We believe (hope?) we have something of value to offer, but aren't sure. Our doubts hold us back.

As Executive Director of the Maui Writers Conference for 17 years, I walked the beach every morning to rehearse that day's introductions. One day, I saw a woman sitting on the beach by herself, crying. I went over and asked, "Are you okay?"

She said, "No, I'm not okay. I don't belong here."

"Why do you feel that way?"

“Who am I to write a book? I don’t have a Ph.D. I'm not perfect. It’s like I'm putting myself up on a pedestal and saying I'm an expert when I'm not. That feels so arrogant. I just don't know if I can do it.”

“Hmmm. What do you want to write about?”

“My husband and I adopted a child, and it’s been more challenging than we anticipated. I went to the library to try to find a book that could help, but they al had these ‘Pollyanna’ messages about what a blessing and joy it is. They made me feel worse. I want to write the book I need I can’t find.”

“Got it. What’s an example of what you want to write about?”

“I want to write about the things most adoptive parents are too embarrassed to admit. Like the time Ari was three years old and I fixed spaghetti for dinner. He reached across the table, picked up a handful and threw it in my face. My first thought was, ‘MY son would never have done that.' I was so ashamed that thought would even occur to me.”

“What else?”

“I want to write share that, even though it's been challenging, when it’s time to send pictures of Ari to his birth mother, I still edit out the cute ones because I'm so afaid she’s going to change her mind and want him back.”

I said, “Jana, the question to ask isn't "Who am I to do this?" .... the question to ask is "Will someone reading my book benefit?" 

If your stories, insights and lessons-learned might inspire, educate or enlighten others – then not only do you have a right to right, you have a responsibiity to write."

Have you ever thought about it that way?

Ideas in your head help no one.

If your work might resonate with even one person ... it's time to get it out of your head and into the world.

Jana Wolff did turn her writing dreams into reality. You can go to Amazon right now and check out her book Secret Thoughts of an Adoptive Mother. It is still making a difference for people twenty years after it was first published. In fact, not a week goes by that Jana doesn’t hear from someone who gets in touch to say, “I thought I was the only one.”

Do you have art you want to share?

A business you want to start?

A creative project you want to launch?

Are you going back and forth wondering "Who am I?" to do this?

 Please remind yourself, your contributions can't do anyone any good in your head. 

If your offering might help someone be a little happier, a little healthier, a little wiser, a little less alone - do it.

Pablo Picasso said, "The meaning of life is to find your gift, the purpose is to give it away."

Gifting your gifts isn't arrogant, it's an offering. It's not hubris; it's human.

You will never be sorry you got what you care about out of your head and into the world, you will only be sorry you didn't do it ... sooner. 

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Sam Horn, CEO of the Intrigue Agency is on a mission to help people create quality projects that add value for all involved. Her 3 TEDx talks and books - including POP!, Tongue Fu!, IDEApreneur and Washington Post bestseller Got Your Attention? - have been featured in New York Times, and presented to NASA, Accenture, Intel. Cisco, Capital One, YPO.  This is excerpted from SOMEDAY is Not a Day in the Week - her newest book