Creating Irresistible First Impressions

"You shouldn't judge a book by its cover"

It's a platonic old school saying, and many are big believers of it. But when it comes to meeting new people: you still do it, even I do it, and for that matter, every one of us judges a book by its cover.

First Impressions Matter.

The reason is that we humans are fear-based creatures. We're constantly scanning our environment and those around us, and make snap decisions on how we perceive them. Our reptilian brain had to evolve like this for discerning the obvious potential benefits/threats in our caveman times.

Let's say you are meeting a prospective client, a potential recruiter, or pitching an idea in a meeting or a networking event. The quality of engagement you get on what you're about to say next depends on how well you were perceived. And the interaction is just a chain sequence from there.

In real life, it takes only a few seconds to create a first impression. We can't say any amount of strategically chosen words that would make sense in that little time, to be perceived just the right way. Besides even if we had all the time, we wouldn't be able to do it with just words.

Now picture someone you know in your life who is influential, say an expert in their field. Experts have a certain way of talking the literally commands respect. Some people have an energizing presence.

So how can 'You' do it?

Enter Sub-communication

Call it the language of thy emotional self, thy higher self. Your body language, voice, and your facial expressions have an untapped vocabulary of their own, that speaks directly to people's subconscious. And this language of sub-communication is way more powerful than your spoken words.

Here are 3 rules of initial engagement that will create irresistible and lasting first impressions:

1. Find your body and your space: Back straight, chin up, and shoulders relaxed. A naturally confident person knows where they're 'going'. And this shows in their body. Often times in high-pressure situations, our self-doubt creeps in and our body starts to cave in. By finding your being in your body, reinforcing it with positive body language, you also start to affect the way you think and it becomes good positive feedback to your thoughts.
2. Project Your Voice: Do you think you are worth listening to? Do you think you deserve to be heard? Well, if yes, then make yourself heard. If you're somebody who had been asked sometimes to repeat the very first sentence you spoke, then this is a definite 'must-fix'. If people have to put in an effort to just hear you, then you are losing out big time on rapport, and worse, it creates 'micro-resentment' sometimes. Besides, being loud and clear projects that you're sure of yourself, and that what you say had weight to it.
3. Language of the Eyes: This language is so powerful, that it is beyond comprehension. For the sake of the case that we are making here: Do make it a habit to look people in the eye when you talk to them. Not their foreheads, not their shoulder, not the wall, not the phone, and definitely not the floor, BUT IN THEIR EYES. Give them your total undivided attention, make them feel important that way.

As simple as these might sound, if you are not applying these, you are losing out on how you are being perceived. Now, these are fundamentals that you can implement starting now, and see results for yourself. Spoiler alert: If done right, you'll surprise yourself.

And these work just as well for your zoom calls (We have tested that too), in case you were wondering what you could do if you're working from home.

If you are looking to go deeper and learn the art of influence and charisma, learn the vocabulary of sub-communication, and use it to power your career success, send me a DM on LinkedIn. We can see if and how I help you.

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