Is Courtesy no longer Common?
PHOTO: TRANSLINK

Is Courtesy no longer Common?

I am going to try to discuss a subject without coming off pretentious.

As someone who has spent my whole career working with Rare Earth, I would like to discuss something that has also become Rare.

Has anyone else noticed a change in etiquette, compassion, and courtesy. You can laugh because it is ironic to hear a Canadian talk about politeness however, I think this lesson is very important for anyone in service, sales, or leadership.

I was on my way home from the office downtown riding the 6pm Subway and as usual the train was very full. Multiple times I noticed someone push me from the back to get by… just forcing their way through. It did not hurt me but there is a phrase in English for this situation; Excuse me goes a long way and is now a rare turn of phrase. Please and thank you are not wasted words… If you ask for something in the right way the response will always be yes.

It got me thinking about how people treat each other in every situation, not just professional.

This world is a much more beautiful place when we show kindness to one another. Don’t be afraid to admit when you have done wrong or come up short, it is actually a sign of a confident mature individual. Take criticism in the best possible way, allow it to help you find growth rather than resentment. Do not speak negatively about another, it only makes you look small and do not allow negative talk to be around you.

Downtown Vancouver there are many people in need, in danger of overdose, in unstable conditions and the professionals seem to pass right by. There are people struggling with a task and an extra hand would make all the difference. Keep your eyes open, keep your heart open but keep yourself safe. We can help people without endangering ourselves.

I had a saying, “Everyone should be a janitor at one time in their life, so everyone understood that someone must clean up after you”. Imagine a world where we all delt with our own mess.

Please refresh the lessons of old: Hold the door open, kind words go a long way and compliments are free, Smiles are also free and saying hello to a stranger is not being creepy, generosity is the highest evolution of gratitude. Words are important, speak positively or hold your tongue. Listen twice as much as you speak.

As a professional, politeness starts with how you present yourself. Tact, Fairness, Equity are worth defending. Modesty is like a fine perfume especially when worn on an accomplished person. Negotiating for mutual benefit ensures long-term business relationships. Patience and Perseverance is the key to obtaining anything.

Empathy was my personal word for 2023, as a human trait it is the highest level of enlightenment. But as a salesperson it is your superpower. If you can discover someone’s need and then supply it, you will never be outsold. Empathy starts with listening but finishes in the heart.

I would also like to make one last statement without the risk of being canceled, I would ask modern society not to take away my right to be a gentleman. Please do not take offence when I offer you my chair or hold the door, offer my jacket, or check to make sure you got home safely. There are people who still genuinely care and want to help.

Evelyn Adrian

Analyst, Problem Solver and Active Listener

7 个月

I'm from US. I live in the middle of the country. It seems to me that courtesy and kindness have gone right out the window on either coast here. It's everyone for themselves, with no time to think of others. In the Midwest, we still consider them virtues, but we are increasingly less likely to employ them. I was brought up to be very polite and considerate. Customer service training has emphasized that in my work life. Perhaps that means that my standards are high. Certainly, if someone pushes me out of their way, I consider myself honor bound to at least give them the pointed, "Excuse me!" they didn't give to me. I hope this is a swing of the pendulum, and someday we will see it swing back. Until then, I will continue to set the best example I can.

Majid Dashti, MBA

Manager at Ben Moss Jewellers (CJ limited)

8 个月

Well written Tyson Roset. I like your perspective on what’s happening these days in Vancouver and Canada for that matter. “Modesty is like a fine perfume especially when worn on an accomplished person” Loved it very very well said??. I’ll be using it and qoute you.

Arjun Rajagopalan

Healthcare | Wellness | Productivity - Writer, Mentor, Coach

8 个月

"Random acts of kindness; senseless acts of beauty" - courtesy and politeness are key determinants of the human self.

David Reid

Owner, D.M. Reid Jewellers Ltd.

9 个月

What you've stated here Tyson is so very true. These qualities are becoming more rare in this day and age. Perhaps it is the trickle down effect from the state of our politics here and beyond our borders. Certainly the pandemic also seemed to amplify the 'me' attitude with many people. There seems to be less to bring everyone together and more to push us part now in so many facets of life. Thank you for bringing this forward! We all need to hold more doors open and give up our seats more often in order to change things.

Tyson, you are one of the preeminent gentlemen of our industry and always have been. Thank-you for these gentle reminders. You are holding open doors of empathy and we are all better for it. ??

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