Courageous Communication

One of my favorite questions that I ask my clients is,?“What conversation is it time to have?”?I learned this powerful question during?my training?as a coach and it has stayed with me ever since. I find myself having to ask this question often because it is common for my clients to find themselves faced with challenges in their personal or professional relationships that they are not sure how to approach. They don’t want to cause harm, but they also want relief from their suffering.

There are several proven approaches to effective communication with others, but I’ve found that a powerful way to strengthen these skills starts with examining the conversations and communication that we have with ourselves.

Here are some strategies to support you as you go inward to prepare for what you want to convey externally.

Know Your Nuances.?This week I’m reading?The Four Tendencies: The Indispensable Personality Profiles that Reveal How to Make Your Life Better (and Other People’s Lives Better, Too)?by Gretchen Rubin. Not only has it been helping me to get to know myself better, but I’m learning how to further support my clients, friends, and loved ones. The more you learn about yourself, the more you understand how and why certain people and environments impact you the way that they do.

What are your?tendencies? How might you use what you’ve learned about yourself and others to enhance your communication skills?

Personal Promises.?How might our desired outcomes shift if we reframed our goals or resolutions as promises to ourselves? Many of us honor the commitments that we make to others because we value integrity. Do we hold the promises and commitments that we make to ourselves in the same high regard? Show up on time, fully present, actively listening and engaged, for meetings and activities with yourself, just as you would with a client, leader, or potential partner you would want to impress. You are worth it, and you deserve it.

What promise do you need to keep with yourself?

Face Forward.?During my senior year in high school?I was so excited about the mock elections. That excitement turned into shame when I saw that I was nominated for class gossip. Thankfully I didn’t win. Now, when I find myself feeling the urge to talk about someone behind their back, I take it as a clear indicator that it is time for me to have a conversation with that person directly.?One of the areas of personal growth that I am most proud of is the massive reduction of time spent discussing other people in unproductive ways. I now use that time that I’ve freed up to do my own inner work so that I feel brave and equipped to have those hard conversations.

What conversation is it time for you to have?

This week I challenge you to reflect on your relationship with yourself and others. Use what you learn to support you as you engage in courageous communication from the inside out.

Manifestation Affirmations

I am investing my time in learning and growing in my relationship with myself.

I am keeping my promises to myself.

I am having courageous conversations with myself and others.