Costume Confrontation

It's mid October and I've begun my quest for something fun to wear for Halloween. I work in student engagement and one must be 'hip' and 'with it' to relate to the students and I need all the help I can get.

Today I was in a popular drug store lazily perusing the Halloween section when I came across a wig that made my shoulders slump in disappointment. The white model on the front of the package wore blonde dreadlocks, with black streaks on her face clumsily representing some idea of war paint, and what looked to be a low cut dress with an approximation of an Indigenous design on its sleeves. The name of this costume...Women's Savage Beauty Wig.

Sigh.

I didn't know what the right thing was to do so I hid it behind a humidifier that looked like it had been there for ages and wasn't going to be sold soon. I took a picture of the costume and made a promise to write a letter to the store and to the manufacturer.

20 minutes later I'm at my local catch-all store that I frequent at least once a week for various knick knacks or stuff we need around the house. I go over to the Halloween section. Two packages. White models. Black Afro Wigs. Mother trucker. I grab them and place them behind a stack of posters that probably won't get moved.

I start to leave and round the corner to see two huge walls of Halloween costumes. I scan the section and at the very top there are 8-9 packages of the ... Sheik Accessory Kit. UGGGHHHH! I bring them down in full view of the teller. Now what? She knows I have them. We've made eye contact. I can't hide 8 packages and then walk out the door. It's a small shop and that confrontation could lead to problems.

So what do I do? I pace the aisles with my shitty Sheik costumes fretting over what is and isn't appropriate for this white girl to do. What are my responsibilities as an ally? What am I not considering? What are the impacts of doing nothing? What are the impacts of doing something?

My thoughts:

If I hide them, I can be reasonably sure that no one will be able to buy them in time for Halloween...or perhaps ever.

But then store never knows it's not okay to sell cultures as costumes and I am once again, actively complicit in white supremacy.

or

If I hide them, the store sees the items missing, assumes they're sold out and orders more - thinking these things are great and that the people want them. Supply and demand - and I am once again, actively complicit in white supremacy.

or

I hide them and am reducing profit from a store owned and operated by people of colour, thereby resulting in me being.........actively complicit in white supremacy!

or

I hide them, they're found, and need to be put back or packed up or whatever and I've now created more work for people of colour probably not getting paid too much to begin with who may or may not have any say at what gets sold in the store. Annnnnnd actively com....you get it.

This is a lot for a Saturday afternoon in the screw aisle.

I have to speak to the manager. I hate confrontation. It's a risk. I call the woman over and ask her if she would consider not selling these specific costumes. I explain that selling a culture as a costume is not appropriate, especially when this "costume" is representative of a group of people who can't wear actually wear this exact clothing in many parts of the world without being labelled a terrorist.

The manager stared at the costume dumbfounded. Three or four full round awkward seconds of silence stretched out before she reacted.

"It's just a costume"

"I'm ***, am I supposed to be offended when people wear *** from my culture or come up and greet me with ***?

"This is too much."

"I moved to Canada for a reason."

"It's just a joke."

"People don't mean any harm."

I try to explain better and I ask her again to consider not selling the costumes.

"Well if you care so much, you can buy them and then throw them away."

"No, I'm sorry, I won't be supporting this with money."

"Well, we've already paid for them so they're going back up."

"That's disappointing, I don't think I can shop at your store again."

.....

Guys. I didn't do this super well. I didn't explain to the best of my ability. I'm not great on the spot. But I was polite and calm...I swear.

I was aware of my tall stature next to her petite frame, and so I angled my body to be less intimidating. I was aware of my tone of voice and the words I used. I was aware of my whiteness and how this all must look as I tried to explain cultural appropriation to the manager who was a person of colour.

The nuances of intercultural work have no end and this story ended with a stalemate.

So that was my day today.

Your thoughts? Criticisms? Should I have done what I did? Did I make things worse? Were there alternatives I didn't think of? Aspects I haven't considered?

....

If you're wondering what cultural appropriation is and why I'm making such a big deal about it, please see below some very informative article by people who've said it much better than I can.

This one is fantastic too.

Thanks,

Erin