THE COST OF FAILING TO NEGOTIATE AT WORK

Now you probably know, at least in theory, that you should be negotiating your salary packet when you land a job. But negotiation isn’t just about salary. I want to talk about negotiation across every aspect of your career, and indeed life, as a tool to help you drive a smoother path to who you want to be and staying there.

Because I see so many of us not negotiating enough.

And I'm not really surprised. Society has conditioned us to keep everyone happy, encourage smiles and gather our gold stars. And saying, “Hey, I want this.” feels like the opposite of that.

And it's why, although I'm disappointed when I read comments by women in tech communities such as one I saw just last week which read, “'Well, if you're earning enough and you're comfortable, there's no need to negotiate”, I'm not surprised. Although, I am disappointed. 

Because yes sure, if we all earned enough and that was the general consensus then great. But the reality is, not negotiating has much broader consequences than simply not taking home more money.

I, actually, encourage all of my clients to negotiate even if they don't “need” the pay rise because it provides an unconscious message of leadership material. A message to take you seriously. Because after all, if you aren't willing to negotiate, what does that say about how you'll show up as a leader? What will you do when another team and you are in conflict over time, resources, or something else? Will you fail to negotiate to backfill your work instead of working all the hours and burning out, or failing to deliver because there is simply too much?

The real cost of failing to negotiate is actually complex and far beyond the salary piece which contributes to the gender pay gap we hear so much about. It is not being seen as a leader. It is not being taken seriously. It is about having to justify yourself more of the time because you didn't negotiate at other times so they see someone who isn't sure and therefore they need to check-up on.

Obviously, it does start with your salary or total compensation package. And even if you are comfortable with the initial offer, I always always suggest making a counteroffer. Firstly, remember that it is basically expected. And the thing is if you don't counter, it says unconsciously that you don't back yourself.

One of the best things I did was knowing my red lines for my first C-Suite. When the offer was first made they wanted me to move to Spain — and well, I have a two-body problem and didn't want to leave Scotland, as much as the job was exciting. So I turned it down. Several months later, having spoken to a couple of other people, they came back to me and offered me that job anyway. I knew my red line, didn't cross it, and was comfortable with the potential consequence of not getting the job. But in hindsight, it worked out. Another thing I did with that job was spend a lot of time negotiating the terms of the contract, largely because I was in a different country. I'll never forget on my first day my new CEO telling me that, that reassured him I'd be able to negotiate on behalf of the business.

My negotiation provided him with a level of trust in me that we'd otherwise have had to build in a different way. 

I've also had clients push back on an initial offer, although they eventually take it, because it says, “take me seriously.” I've seen time and time again that when we do this, that we have more innate authority when we then step into the role, than when we just grab the offer in apparent desperation. 

You see, everything from your first informational interview with a potential employer sets the tone for everything that comes afterward. And negotiation is a big part of that.

As a leader, you will also need to negotiate on your team's behalf. This may be workload, priorities, resources, or something else. 

Now many of us find negotiating a little easier when it isn't about us. But you apply the same skills and tactics, so you need to be practicing them all the time. Not to mention, that if you've negotiated before, you'll get more respect from those you are negotiating with. 

This brings me to my final point. Negotiation doesn't need to be a pitted battle, nasty or being all out for what you can get. 

That is an outdated and unhelpful view that I think taints a lot of our perceptions of what to expect in a negotiation. Because at the end of the day, negotiation is about getting to a place of mutual agreement that works for all parties involved.

This is why it's worth knowing your BATNA (as the negotiation researchers call it), which is an acronym for the Best Alternative to Non-Agreement. You need to know both your BATNA - what happens if you don't agree (e.g. walk away from a job offer, take on extra hours for your team), as well as, the other side’s BATNA (e.g. they take a backup candidate, or don't get some work done).

When you know your BATNA, and the other side’s BATNA you'll have a better idea of how much you can expect from the negotiation.

And of course, if this is something you struggle with, whether from an experience point of view, how to prepare for negotiation, or it is something you want to do in an upcoming job hunt, I'd be delighted to help. Remember to check out my coaching program at tonicollis.com/workwithtoni or my VIP leaders package at tonicollis.com/vip

And to hear more about The Cost of Failing to Negotiate at Work then don’t miss episode 44 of the Leading Women in Tech Podcast: https://tonicollis.com/episode44