Coronavirus China: Adjusting to a new normal: Fear.

As the whole world is aware, coronavirus became a large issue in China in mid-January. I have been living in China for over four years and have been here throughout the entire outbreak. It’s been an incredibly difficult time for everyone: the health, societal and economics tolls have been huge. But now, as the weeks roll on and the infection rate in China has dropped dramatically just as it’s picking up across the rest of the world.

The world needs to look to China and to see what ‘post-Coronavirus’ looks like. Sadly, nothing is like it was before and it’s making me realise we need to adjust to a new normal.

Fear is something that is hard to live with through for an extended period. I was a child when foot and mouth swept through the UK in 2001. That is the closest I have ever come to living through an epidemic. Luckily this didn’t infect humans, only animals, but my family are farmers and we were directly impacted. It was more economic fear, loss of livelihood and a drastic change to way of life, but it was a fear I now recognise. We used to drive to school and see piles of burning animals in fields. As a child I didn’t fully understand the impact and whilst I was upset, I was never afraid.

Many people living in China remember the SARS outbreak in 2002/2003, so was in living memory for locals, but for me this feeling entirely new.

For the first few weeks of the outbreak I checked my phone religiously, frantically searching for any information I could find. It was a mess, no one really knew anything, the British consulate were unbelievably slow with the news and there were so many rumours being passed around. One reliable source of news was the Chinese webpage that gave regular data updates on infections, suspected infections, recovered people and deaths.

I had people from home calling me daily to check on me. My friends and myself in China checked in with each other daily and tensions were incredibly high. For the first time in my life I was living with fear of dying at age 27.

It doesn’t feel like a *shock* moment. It’s not like when you’re driving and you skid on ice and lose control for a moment. It’s not such a sharp fear. It’s more like how you feel when you pull over after the skid and catch your breath for a moment and you can feel your heart pounding in your ears. Imagine living with that feeling from the moment you wake up to the moment you go to sleep. I’m sorry to say it, but it seems like a feeling that Europe is going to have to get used too.

You fear contact with people, even friends. Offices are shut, cafes, bars and restaurants are shut. Gatherings of more than 3 people are discouraged. You need to carry hand sanitizer and wear a mask... But… people need to work, people need to leave their houses. Masks were sold out almost overnight and a black market quickly sprang up.

You need to remember not to touch your face. Do you know how hard it is to not touch your face? Walk from your office to your car and count how many times you nearly touch your face. It’s been estimated that people touch their faces 27 times per hour.

For me the worst moment was about a month ago. Someone on my street died. They did not die from the virus but that was everyone’s first thought. When someone dies in China, their family draws a chalk circle on the ground, put their favourite possessions, clothes and even bedding in the circle and burn it. Imagine living in constant fear and coming home at night to see a pile of burning possession on the street next door to your home.

Things are now getting better in Shanghai and the fear is becoming more manageable. I feel like one of the main reasons for this is that Western media is turning its gaze and sensationalist headlines away from China and is fixing them on other countries that are struggling with the virus. But also because it’s just not possible to live in a constant state of fear. Fear becomes your new normal. You adjust to it and begin to accept it.

My office building is now open, but you need to go through two temperature tests, log into an app that shows which cities you’ve visited in the last two weeks and then you’re allowed into the building. The air circulation systems (which are also the heating systems) are shut off. We all sit in coats and freeze while we type, or work from home. Remote working has become part of the new normal, with meetings, seminars and conferences all going online.

You plan your activities based on how many masks you have. A mask is only good for about 4 hours. If you only have 3 masks left for the week, you need to careful plan your time out of the house so you don’t go over your time limit.

Whilst the fear of dying, or being ill has faded and has become ‘normal’ there is a new fear. Businesses that shut due to the outbreak are not reopening. I have friends who have lost their jobs. For Example one of China’s biggest English language media outlets went bankrupt a few weeks ago. Many people are only receiving 50% of the salary or even less.

Our fear has changed to an economic one: how can I pay my rent next month? What happens when I can’t buy groceries? Will my company pay me? Will my company survive?

I believe there is a strong chance I am sitting typing this at the centre of the world’s next big economic crash. One that will rival the 2008 crash that began in America. The only difference is this one will affect China, that was barely impacted in 2008.

I was 15 years old in 2008 and I don’t remember being impacted at all. Yes, I read about it in the news, my parents talked about it. We had a family friend who lost his job at a bank, but they had savings and were smart, agile and survived it.

I’m not an economist. But I work in a co-working space with 30 other companies, right now of the 120 people who should be sat here, there are under 10 in the office, and I just don’t know when anyone is coming back or if they will. 

That’s the hardest thing to accept the fear. Maybe this fear is my new normal. Maybe it’s just being adult enough to understand the ringing fear of the economy… maybe it’s just a hard time in a hard place. Whatever it is, I’m wishing the whole world a speedy recovery.