The Core Values of (any) Community

Note: the contents of this article were published in chapter 5 of Hacking Communities, here edited for brevity.

Why Abundance, Humility, and Authenticity are deeply intertwined in any community - and how to apply these.

What makes a community??

When building communities, we often highlight "what" brings us together: food, fire, and shelter. But what connects us doesn't matter as much as why we stay together.?

Hugh Mason, co-founder and CEO of JFDI Asia, says, "community building is like the turkey in the Thanksgiving dinner: people get together to eat the turkey, but what matters are the conversations around the table." A renowned community builder and a good friend, Hugh co-founded JFDI as one of the first startup accelerators in Singapore. It played a vital role as a lighthouse and cohesion point for the Southeast Asian startup community. Hugh and his co-founder did not play a centralizing role in it but created a space for people to get together.

In this chapter, we will talk about the three core values that make a community. From the Latin cor, the word "core" refers both to heart and (more recently) to seed. Without core values, a gathering could become a crowd or, worse, a Cool Kids Club. People share space, ideas, and other things like food at every meeting. But as we have discussed, anything not based on belonging is not a community. Community implies continuous encounters within safe spaces, which build the trust to grow.?

Let's dive deeper.

The Core Values of Communities

In the long term, the "why" we gather matters more than "what" brings us together. Another critical factor is "how" we stay together.?

Communities are people about sharing (anything). The why means walking in the same direction, setting the tone for the path we walk towards: the how. Sharing values is like defining how we interact. Our modus operandi is defined by our core.

Hugh Mason told me that if you had asked him, "Who are you?" ten years ago, he would have said, "a storyteller." Today, he calls himself a community builder. As discussed in Chapter 3, building communities is about creating stories that connect people. In ancient times, tribal chiefs or village elders were storytellers at large. A community implies a shared story. According to Yuval Noah Harari, "as long as everybody believes in the same fiction, everybody obeys and follows the same rules, the same norms, the same values." We tell stories to align behaviors.

We tell stories to align behaviors.

From ancient times, we have told stories that translate our core values into metaphors. Today, we tell stories in the shape of company manifestos or paintings on the walls featuring a mission and vision. But creating a beautiful company manifesto isn't enough. You need to reinforce it through daily action that demonstrates you are what you say - authentically.?

I spent a long time studying communities, from nonprofits to companies, activists to entrepreneurial communities. I read their manifestos and listened to their leaders talk about what made their business work. I researched and interviewed community builders from the fastest-growing startup ecosystems in the world: Singapore, Stockholm, S?o Paulo, and Silicon Valley. I tried to decode their value systems, drilling to the core. I went back to ancient wisdom. I read stories, from Clarissa Pinkola Estés to John Cacioppo.

I had my aha! moment while writing Hacking Communities. After drawing a bunch of cause-and-effect mind maps, drafting correlations, and playing with Post-it notes, it became clear. The core values of (any) community are the AHA: Authenticity, Humility, and Abundance. Let's dive in.

Why Authenticity? Being Effortless by Being Yourself

"Authenticity is a collection of choices that we have to make every day. It's about the choice to show up and be real. The choice to be honest. The choice to let our true selves be seen." —The Gifts of Imperfection, Brené Brown

There is no community if we deceive ourselves and others into fitting in. How many of us start projects, go places, attend parties, buy things and become more like someone else until we no longer recognize ourselves? And how many of us feel threatened to reveal our true selves and be seen? The threat may not be real, but the perception of it is. According to somatic psychotherapist Nora Alwah, "Anyone with a marginalized background knows the pain of not being able to share your whole truth." True belonging can only find its way through authenticity.?

Authenticity builds relationships, not transactions. One of Startup Grind's core values reads: "make friends, not contacts." Authenticity is what makes us feel at home. Authenticity is the gateway to true belonging.

In Braving the Wilderness, Brené Brown says, "Fitting in is about assessing a situation and becoming who you need to be accepted. Belonging, however, doesn't require us to change who we are; it requires us to be who we are."

Our first step is to recognize and cultivate a sense of home.

Being yourself—or, better put, becoming yourself—is a journey, not a destination. It is the way home that builds the characters we love. Like Dorothy getting caught in a tornado, Alice falling down the rabbit hole, and Bilbo trekking to the Lonely Mountain. It is a journey "there and back again."

From a practical perspective, authenticity is about energy efficiency. When you're authentic, you pump fuel straight from the heart. You're less sensitive to people's thinking and more connected to what drives you. Authenticity = efficiency. When you build a brand from an authentic place, everything you say and does resembles you.

Authenticity = efficiency. When you build a brand from an authentic place, everything you say and does resembles you.

Reinforcing authenticity helps others to resonate with you. It increases your power to attract and connect with others who share the same beliefs and could walk further with you. Acting from your core saves money and time. It also generates more energy that you can spend doing more of what you're good at.?

Why Humility? Standing Out by Spotlighting Others

"Always remember that you are unique. Just like everyone else."―Margaret Mead

The concept of humility blends well with the very idea of belonging: to feel part of (something more significant).?

Humility emerges from self-love. It comes from feeling at home, from feeling seen. Recalling what we discussed in Chapter 4, self-love is pure power, and love drives acceptance. It brings quiet confidence. It means knowing you are enough. You do not need to prove yourself, make a point, compete, or show off when you belong.?

Humility is like saying, "I'm glad to be a part of this. I am humbled to belong. I care about the collective, as I am part of it. I care that our mission is accomplished, regardless of whether it carries my name. I care about the results over recognition. I don't need to validate myself here. I am enough. I am seen, so I need no spotlight. No competition. I am part of the whole."?Humility yields confidence.?

Humility yields confidence.?

Our society overestimates the value of standing out in the crowd. Yes, standing out can be good: a revolutionary act is sometimes necessary and paves new ways for others to be different. But some of us might have gotten addicted to the idea of being special and unique.?We normalized competition amongst peers. When "you are not like other girls/guys" becomes a compliment, it implies that you must compare yourself to others to qualify. Competition can be a good thing—it inspires us to look outside ourselves, get inspired, learn from others, or level up. But you lose authenticity when it is the core driver for your actions.?

As a company leader, why should you care about humility? What is the practical benefit of thinking as a collective rather than an individual?

Patrick Lencioni, a renowned author on corporate leadership, created a framework demonstrating that high-performance teams have their members focusing on the common good. They feel responsible for collective goals and vision. This sense of ownership comes from truly buying into each decision, communicating authentically, and sharing a safe space. He presents this model for team management in his book The Five Dysfunctions of a Team. Lencioni explains that feeling safe to express yourself authentically gives you a sense that you are part of something. The more you belong, the more you care. When you belong, you feel part of something larger than yourself and are likelier to be humble.?

Think of snowflakes: each has a unique design, but a single snowflake makes no snow. Humility tells us to find peace in belonging to something bigger. It means that you are unique—just like everyone else. Being humble allows you to let the community grow, knowing it is more significant than you.?

Why Abundance? Enabling Growth by Giving First

"You are not your job, you're not how much money you have in the bank. You are not the car you drive. You're not the contents of your wallet. You are not your fucking khakis. You are all-singing, all-dancing crap of the world." ―Fight Club, Chuck Palahniuk

Being abundance-minded correlates to being authentic and humble, at the same time.

Abundance is a state of mind where you believe that the rising tide lifts all boats. It implies trusting that someone else's success benefits everyone, including yourself. It means trusting amazing things are about to happen and rejoicing in other people's joy. Knowing that we thrive by being part of a collective and rise by lifting others. It means recognizing that we don't need to fight for the last slice of pizza but - instead - can make more pizza together.?

Does this sound too idealistic? Let's get down to earth.

Creating abundance facilitates sharing, meaning it favors the flow of knowledge and resources. Above all, it means optimization.

Creating abundance facilitates sharing, meaning it favors the flow of knowledge and resources. Above all, it means optimization. We gain more when we share. But more often than not, we are raised with the idea that by sharing, by giving first, we might be tricked, fall behind, and ultimately lose.?

The best example of why abundance matters are fast-growing startup ecosystems, especially during their early days (when culture is getting shaped by the first generations of founders).

Let's take a look.

The Economic Impact of Abundance

In 2012, I joined NXTP Labs, an Argentinian organization that was one of Latin America's first startup accelerator programs.

My only experience with startup culture at that time was while living in Santiago de Chile. I remember walking into Startup Chile's headquarters in a converted colonial building and meeting a diverse group of people sitting with their laptops under a skylight dome. It communicated openness and creativity. People roamed around, sharing ideas and getting inspired by each other. It felt like stepping through the wardrobe into Narnia.

When I moved to Argentina, I searched for a similar work environment. A friend of mine (who I'd later recognize as one of the best community builders I've ever met) introduced me to Marta Cruz, one of the co-founders of NXTP Labs, and she hired me. While at NXTP Labs, I hosted more than fifty events, each welcoming between fifty and three hundred guests. I managed the visitors' agendas and prepared and facilitated introductions. At times, I even hosted them at my place. Most visitors came from Silicon Valley. Some were investors; others were researching the Buenos Aires startup ecosystem. When preparing agendas or considering who to connect with whom, I was often guided by Ariel Arrieta; besides being one of the co-founders of NXTP Labs, he was also one of the earliest startup founders in Argentina, having launched his first company in the 1990s.I was unaware then, but through his mentorship, I was going through a practical Ecosystem Building MBA.

Inc. reports Argentina as one of the toughest business climates in the world, with one of the highest corruption rates. Yet it is home to one of the first Latin American startups to trade in NASDAQ—MercadoLibre raised a US$289 million IPO in 2007. And it is not alone. In a 2016 article, the Financial Times described Argentina as home to most of Latin America's tech unicorns. The article mentions companies like Globant, OLX, and Despegar.com. I had the luck to learn directly from the founders of some of these tech companies while hosting them at Startup Grind Buenos Aires fireside chats.

The Argentinean batch of founders from the 1990s would become the leading investors in their startup ecosystem. They would inspire, mentor, and support future founders (often former employees at their companies), creating what Endeavor calls a "multiplier effect." One of Latin America's most prominent venture capital firms to this day, Kaszek Ventures, was founded by two early employees from MercadoLibre. There is a tight correlation between past and future unicorns in Argentina.?

The economic value of an abundance mindset has been studied widely, most notably in the case of Silicon Valley. Why did the region become the epicenter of fast technological development in the 20th and 21st centuries? Annalee Saxenian is known for her work on technology clusters and social networks in Silicon Valley. In Regional Advantage: Culture and Competition in Silicon Valley and Route 128, she explains that the success of Silicon Valley is related to a culture of openness and sharing.

Research conducted by Startup Genome validates that economic growth is accelerated by local connectedness. That is, the amount of peer-to-peer support offered between founders. Local connectedness also includes support from experts and investors, who often have no shares or specific interests in the company they are helping.?

Engineering Abundance-Minded Spaces

To engineer an abundance-minded space, you must start by giving first, regardless of the perceived risks. Abundance emerges from feeling grateful for what you have while knowing it to be impermanent. It is about creating confidence that what you truly need to feel completely happy is within yourself.?

Abundance is a state of mind that emerges from feeling safe enough to be your most authentic self, from feeling at peace to be part of something. When you feel at home, you trust good things will happen. Coding an abundance mindset into communities within a scarcity context means creating a safe place. It means creating a sense of home, and family, and being the first to trust.

Coding an abundance mindset into communities within a scarcity context means creating a safe place. It means creating a sense of home, and family, and being the first to trust.

Start by giving, and let the virtuous circle begin.

Note: if someone is trying to "steal" or act unethically within your community, you must take action. Burning bridges with scarcity-minded behavior at times is fundamental to keeping an abundant space.

Prerequisites to Manifest the AHA Core Values

"You are only free when you realize you belong no place—you belong every place—no place at all. The price is high. The reward is great."?—Maya Angelou

A safe space is sine qua non for people to express themselves freely. A safe space is where people feel at home because they find something familiar. We will dive deeper into it in the next chapter. You can always find generous people in a scarce context. Generosity is a beautiful act that can inspire further generosity in others, who will repeat the action towards someone else in a continuous pay-it-forward fashion.?

Yet, under average circumstances, abundance thrives best if it goes in all directions. Creating safe spaces is the best way to get started in every case. When people feel safe, they feel like they can trust whoever is within that space, and consequently, they are more willing to contribute. To give first means to belong.?

Actions speak louder than words. Leading by example is fundamental to implementing any value you expect your community to follow. It can lead to changing behavior through role modeling as long as it is repeated relentlessly amongst the same group of people.

There is no chronological order between these core values. You can embed them into your community from every corner. Start anywhere and everywhere:

1) By demonstrating authenticity. It builds up trust and makes people feel that they can give first.?

2) By acting humble. It shows that there is no need for power struggles or competition and that standing out isn't what matters.?

3) By practicing abundance. It inspires others to give, enhancing trust and making people feel they can relax, open up, and share.

That's how you create a virtuous circle: from one to many.

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