Core Truths: Three things you'll hear from me in Coaching

In my coaching sessions, there are three fundamental truths that you’ll hear from me over and over again. These are not just catch phrases, but principles designed to empower you, to help you take control of your life, and to encourage you to CREATE meaning and purpose.?

1. Even When It’s Not About You, It’s Still About You

Life happens around us, often outside of our control. AND, even when situations seem to have nothing to do with us, our reaction and our role in those situations are crucial. So, what's good about this? How did you contribute? How can you contribute to a solution or things going right? When the tough stuff hits, the second you blame it on or make it about somebody else — they didn’t do it right, they didn’t do enough, they didn’t give me what I wanted, they said the wrong thing - you are GIVING YOUR POWER AWAY!

No matter what’s happening, ask yourself: What is this for ME? Why is this showing up for me in this moment? Learn from it. Radical ownership means reclaiming your power and using every experience as an opportunity to grow your capacity.

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2. You Are Who You Choose to Be

Every day, you make choices about how you show up in the world. Your energy, your attitude, and your actions are all within your control. Have you ever found yourself excusing someone’s behavior because that’s just how they are? “Oh, that’s just Paul,” or “John is always like that, don’t take it personally.”?

In reality, this is just a person choosing to be a jerk, choosing to move through the world in a way that’s upsetting to everyone around them. And what do we do? We give them license to be that way because, well, “That’s just Paul being Paul.” Sure, you can choose to be a Paul. That has always been up to you.

But let's dig deeper. When we excuse someone's negative behavior, we are not only enabling them but also diminishing our own standards and boundaries. We start accepting less than we deserve, tolerating disrespect or unkindness because we've labeled it as 'normal' for them. This mindset can creep into our own self-perception, subtly teaching us to lower our expectations for our own behavior as well.

Remember, you are who you choose to be, and that choice is made every. single. day.

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3. None of This Matters

When everything feels overwhelming and it’s too much to handle, remember - NONE OF THIS MATTERS. We are specks of dust, floating through space at a speed we cannot comprehend, being kept alive by an invisible force. In that grand scheme, how big is this really?

If it feels like you’re carrying the weight of the world, stop and remember this for a second. It’s easy to get sucked into the chaos of day-to-day life and the smallness of it all (however big it may feel). By putting things in perspective, you can alleviate some of that pressure and refocus on what truly matters. Breathe, you’re doing the work. Whatever is showing up for you, sit in it for a minute, an hour, a month. Whatever you need to learn, get the goods, and keep moving forward. You can camp out in this space, but don’t let yourself live there.?

Think about the times you've been stressed about a deadline, a disagreement, or an unexpected challenge. In the moment, these issues can consume you. But take a step back and ask yourself: Will this matter in five years? Will this define who I am or what I stand for? Chances are, the answer is no.

The universe is vast and infinite, and our time here is fleeting. When you zoom out and see the bigger picture, the daily dramas and pressures start to shrink in significance. This doesn’t mean your feelings aren’t valid or that your struggles aren’t real. It simply means they don’t have to define you.

These principles are not just ideas but calls to action. They remind you to take control of your life, to make empowering choices, and to stay grounded. Remember, nothing changes on the outside. Real growth and strength come from doing your work first. By embracing these truths, you can not only transform your own life but also inspire those around you to do the same.