Conversational Intelligence: The Missing X Factor In Your Team?

Hi friends,

Let me tell you a story of two teams.

While neither of these is a real team, both of them are based on my many years of experience workshopping with groups of leaders.?

Team A’s Story

One morning, Team A gathered for a strategic planning session. They wanted to come up with a plan of action for next year. And in everyone’s eyes, the session went wonderfully.?

Each leader listened actively to the others' perspectives and built on ideas collaboratively. They asked thought-provoking questions that sparked innovative thinking, and the workshop felt like a safe, trusting, open, and honest space for constructive feedback.?

Decisions were made efficiently, problems were solved with healthy conflict.?

At the end of it all, Team A walked away with an aligned vision, comprehensive plan of action, and the motivation to execute it all seamlessly.?

Team B’s Story

We don’t have to dive too deep into the second team’s experience—as you’ve probably already guessed, it didn’t go anywhere near as smoothly.?

The leaders talked over one another, failing to really listen, and misunderstandings verged on escalating out of control.?

If I hadn’t been there to facilitate, I’m pretty sure the hostile atmosphere of Team B’s workshop would have led to more blame, defensiveness, and communication breakdowns. They were well en route to delaying their decisions (yet again), and missing valuable strategic opportunities.

So…what did the members of Team A do right that the leaders in Team B did not?

What skills or X factor did each teammate have?

The answer is Conversational Intelligence.?

It describes how well individuals in a team can engage in meaningful, effective conversations that foster trust, collaboration, and innovation.?

What Does It Look Like?

Leaders with high conversational intelligence recognize that verbal interactions aren’t just about transmitting information. They’re just as much about:?

• Building trust
• Fostering collaboration, and?
• Generating innovative ideas.?

Leaders in these teams, like Team A, recognize how conversations can shape culture, influence decision-making, and drive organizational performance.

They know how to listen actively, empathize, and ask powerful questions that stimulate more insights.?

What Can We Learn From Team A’s Leaders?

Conversational intelligence is actually a blend of several skills, with the main two being EQ and communication.?

Practically, it requires:

1. An appreciation of psychological safety: In other words, they understand how to foster an environment where everyone feels safe sharing their ideas, thoughts, and opinions. “Positive sharing” in a leadership team is like fertilizer that leads to stronger decisions, out-of-the-box thinking, and ultimately, more innovative solutions.
2. Active listening: When team members feel truly heard by their colleagues, it’s a real trust-builder. This is especially important in leadership teams because it feeds back into the psychological safety factor, develops mutual understanding, and fosters alignment.
3. Insight into individual communication patterns: The more leaders understand their own conversational strengths, the more they can play to them for the team’s sake. The opposite also applies - the more each leader knows about the others’ influencing styles, the more they can leverage those for collective results.

Now based on this—do you think it’s important for your executive team?

Over To You

My questions for you this week are, of course, all about conversational intelligence.?

• How can you contribute to creating a team environment where all leaders feel psychologically safe?
• What steps can you take to encourage active listening so that you and your fellow executives feel heard?
• How well does each leader in your team know their own influencing strengths and weaknesses, and how much do they know about those of their teammates?

If you’d like to learn more about this topic, TTGG is currently testing the first iteration of our in-person Conversational Intelligence workshops.?

→ We’re offering a free one-day Conversational Intelligence training program for Dubai-based leaders and professionals as this week’s 20th Anniversary giveaway. This prototype workshop is face-to-face, and it takes place in Dubai at the end of August - beginning of September.?

If you, as a leader, are interested in helping us prototype this training program during the abovementioned period, all you need to do is send me a DM here on LinkedIn.

Look forward to hearing from you,

Govert