Conversation Starter Cards

Getting proficient in compassionate communication techniques takes practice. One of the most important techniques to practice: The RIR Protocol?.

#1: Face a trigger?

• Think about a statement that triggers you.
• Pick something someone said that really upset you, and write it down.

#2: Recognize it

• Look at what you wrote down.
• Then, write down your answers to the following questions:
• What is the initial feeling that comes up for you when you hear the statement?
• Where do you feel it in your body?
• Without riding your emotional wave, what would your normal reaction be?
• Would that reaction yield your desired outcome?

#3: Interrupt it

• Choose one of the following sample stems:
• What does that mean to you?
• I’ve had a different experience with _________.
• Tell me more about that.
• Practice using the stem to interrupt the statement you picked as a trigger.

#4: Repair it?

• Think about the statement you chose and the interruption you used.
• Which strategy for repair might be best to re-engage with the person who made the statement?

Keep on practicing, by writing down different statements that really impacted you. That way, when you get triggered, you’ll be ready. And will be able to successfully recognize, interrupt, and repair.

Epoch Education, Inc Conversation Starter cards make it really easy to practice the RIR protocol. You can order them here .