Conversation Intellect & Emotional Quotient for Authentic leadership

Have you ever wondered why certain leaders are imprinted in history?

Today let us talk about the quote by Maya Angelou. The quote is “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”

Have you wondered why?

This is where why certain leaders get imprinted in history. There is neuroscience behind this. In today’s article I will be talking about how as leaders, we need to leverage neuroscience to embrace authentic leadership and conversation intelligence to have happier teams and better vision engagement.

The conversation intelligence is terms coined by Judith E. Glaser, an organizational anthropologist. This the ability which is hardwired and learned to connect, engage, and navigate with others.

In Glaser’s words “The key to better health is to better understand our brain. By understanding how the brain functions, communicates, and responds to our environment, we can reach our full potential. The brain does not speak French or English, it speaks neuroscience.”

This intellect is used to enhance or build the power of language and conversation significantly impacting the relationships and healthy productivity.

Ok why is this intellect even needed for Leaders, isn’t emotional intelligence enough? Well, I will get into the relationship of these two in later sections. Getting your attention back to Conversational Intelligence. I believe it is one of the most effective leadership tools to ?build the required psychological safe space your team, which would in turn ?have them contribute with their ideas, act upon them, and make them feel empowered. Being a highly conversational intelligent leader can result into more participative and contended teams.

Talking isn't just about swapping info. It actually changes how our brains work! Good chats can make people feel comfortable and trusting, opening the door for deeper connections. But negative ones can shut us down.

It's all thanks to something called neuroscience. Conversations trigger the release of powerful chemicals in our brains, like hormones and special messengers. These can rev up our bodies and brains, not just for a quick moment, but for a long time.

When our brains pick up on trust during a conversation, it's like flipping a switch in the control center (the prefrontal cortex). This unlocks a whole network for things like creative thinking, bonding, and coming up with new ideas – basically, all the good stuff for strong relationships!

If a conversation feels off or someone seems suspicious, our brains go into high alert mode! That fight-or-flight feeling you get? That's your brain's amygdala and limbic system kicking in. They're basically shouting, "Danger!"

This makes it super hard to concentrate on what the other person is saying. Our brains are too busy trying to figure out if we should stay and fight or just get out of there! We basically shut down our listening mode until the threat seems to pass.

Mastering the art of conversation?

Have you ever seen the person with highest score in class with a brilliant mind struggle because they just couldn't connect with others?

The truth is strong leadership is built on strong conversations.

Think about it: When someone makes you feel valued and heard, doesn't it make you want to open up and contribute more? This is the magic of conversational intelligence (CI). It's the ability to connect with people on a deeper level, build trust, and unlock creativity and innovation.

The good news? We can all learn this!

Here are some tips to boost CI and become a conversation champion:

1. Break the Ice and Build Bridges: Think about those traditions that help us connect, like bringing a gift when visiting someone. We can create similar customs at work! Fun team-building activities or celebrating holidays together can spark openness and trust.

2. The T.R.U.S.T. Model: Your Guide to Building Strong Relationships:

• Transparency: Be open and honest. When your team sees you're genuine, they'll trust you.
• Relationships: Strong bonds are key. Focus on empathy, understanding, and shared goals.
• Understanding: Ditch the interrupting! Listen actively to truly grasp others' perspectives.
• Shared Success: Celebrate wins together! Collaboration is the key to a thriving team.
• Truth: Authenticity builds trust. Be honest and kind, but remember, respect goes both ways.

3. The Art of Listening: Listening isn't just waiting for your turn to talk. Judith E. Glaser identifies 3 levels of listening:

• Level 1: Information exchange. Think daily task updates.
• Level 2: Deeper understanding. See things from their perspective before sharing yours (great for negotiations!).
• Level 3: Building connections. This is where the magic happens! Bonding conversations release oxytocin, the trust hormone, leading to deeper connections and a positive feedback loop.

Become a Conversational Leader:

Mastering CI isn't just about work success. It improves your personal life and well-being too! By understanding how our brains work, we can unlock a world of connection and collaboration.

Untill now we have understood, what is conversation intelligence, how it impacts the people around us.

Now let me take you to brain science behind how in today’s AI world, practicing authentic leadership is necessary and how is conversational intelligence playing role in the same.

As technology leaders, we often rely on our logical brain to navigate complex challenges. Low and behold, as humans, we can be harnessing the power of both our emotional and logical brains. It can lead to more authentic and impactful, conversationally intelligent leadership.

What is Emotional Brain?

Our emotional brain allows us to connect with others on a deeper level, fostering trust, empathy, and collaboration. By tapping into our emotional intelligence, we can inspire and motivate our teams, creating a culture of belonging and mutual respect. For example, expressing genuine appreciation for a team member's hard work or acknowledging their personal challenges can strengthen bonds and boost morale.

What is Logical Brain?

Meanwhile, our logical brain enables us to analyze data, make strategic decisions, and drive results. By leveraging our analytical skills, we can set clear objectives, devise effective strategies, and mitigate risks. For instance, using data-driven insights to identify areas for process optimization or resource allocation can optimize efficiency and drive innovation.

Can they be integrated?

The key to authentic leadership lies in integrating both our emotional and logical brains harmoniously. This means leading with empathy and compassion while also maintaining clarity, focus, and accountability. For example, actively listening to our team members' concerns, validating their perspectives, and offering constructive feedback demonstrates empathy, while setting realistic goals, providing clear direction, and holding ourselves and others accountable fosters accountability and drive towards results.

Top Tips for Practice Conversationally intelligent Authentic Leadership:

Cultivate self-awareness: Understand your own emotions, triggers, and biases to lead authentically.

Practice active listening: Listen attentively, show empathy, and validate others' perspectives to build trust and rapport.

Lead with empathy: Understand and respond to the emotions of your team members, fostering a culture of psychological safety and belonging.

Communicate transparently: Share your vision, goals, and expectations openly, promoting clarity and alignment.

Balance empathy with accountability: Hold yourself and others accountable for results while supporting personal and professional growth.

Let's embrace the power of emotional and logical intelligence to develop the conversational intelligence to practice authentic leadership in our leadership journey. Inspiring authenticity, fostering collaboration, and driving meaningful impact together is my goal and of many more leaders.

#AuthenticLeadership #EmotionalIntelligence #LogicalThinking #TechLeadership #ConverstionalIntelligence