A CONVERSATION A DAY SAVES A LIFE

How long has it been since you heard from your high school best friend? What about the call you have been putting off since graduation? Social interaction is hard coded into our very being such that the slightest shift from it causes a myriad of emotions including?loneliness, boredom, and self-doubt. Rabbi Ben Zoma once asked “who is wise” and answered his own question “The person who learns from every human being.” Google does not have all the answers thus, "ask people, not google."

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Research by Professor John Cacioppo on connected minds: Social brains and the need for community brought to light the very basic source of our inherent socially dependent nature. His research indicates that, unlike humans, the offsprings of some animals such as sardines, sea turtles, and snakes are independent at birth. Humans on the other hand have the longest periods of attachment to their parents. Loneliness and other negative behavioral perceptions are more prevalent in humans as we age.

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Studies have shown that it takes only one conversation a day with a friend to feel better. We have not paid enough attention to the fact that humans are social beings who tend to live happily in good social settings. We all need some level of social interaction to live a good life, if not a great one. We hear about the need for financial stability, but what about social stability? What about the need for social relations and interactions? Lack of social stability tilts the scale in a very negative direction for introverted individuals. Rebuilding our social communities, and developing trust among each other is necessary for our long-term survival. We can achieve this through free-flowing conversations. Conversations in which we let down our walls and freely voice out our concerns. Until we start to have that conversation we mostly regard as unnecessary, we can never know what the other person is going through or equally share what we are going through in order to get the help we need.

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At some stage in our lifetime, we come to a point where we feel we can no longer continue. Descriptors like early adulthood crises, midlife crises, and others have described these periods. Unfortunately, the number of people who call it quits far exceeds those who keep moving. The differences in the response can be attributed to our social support systems.

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Social support is the perception and actuality that one is cared for has assured assistance from other individuals and is part of a supportive social network. This network tends to provide emotional support, a sense of belonging, and financial assistance. In today’s socially disconnected society, mostly due to technological advances in communication, a lot of people have unintentionally distanced themselves. There used to be more face-to-face conversations and phone calls, but now, these modes of communication are almost non-existent.?We rather text than call. Social networks and online interactions give individuals a false sense of connectedness. Human connection used to be an amazing phenomenon, but now it is a cycle. From strangers to friends, to close friends, to status and update viewers then back to strangers. Everyone is interested in displaying the highs of their lives and shielding their lows.

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Why do we need social interaction?

As stated earlier, social interactions define our very being. Through these interactions, we build new relationships, strengthen old ones, and we tend to live more happily. Families must raise children who can easily interact with people and have community living skills such as listening, being polite, kind and generous, rather than growing up with mobile phones. Families, businesses, social groups, and even schools should pay particular attention to the well-being of their members. We can achieve this by mimicking the model of?Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) meetings where people can easily utter their deepest worries and challenges without fear of criticism. Social interactions have benefits that extend through every aspect of life. It could be financial, emotional, or informational. These everyday interactions guarantee better mental health and promote a sense of belonging which help individuals develop mutual trust and live good lives.

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Call to action.

Let us be each other's therapists. Start the small talk, keep it going, voice it out, and let the people close to you hear your concerns.?We often hear the statement, "don't tell people your problems because they will only mock you and not help you." This is where our communities come in to find the right people to voice our needs to and know they will listen and help us. In everything we do, we should always know we are social beings before anything else. As such, interactions with each other are very vital for our well-being. So go ahead, pick up the phone, and call that friend. Remember, it takes just a call a day to feel good!