The Controversial Truth About Being a ‘Good’ Taker in a World of Givers

In the span of 12 years, I’ve had the privilege of conducting over 600 free webinars on a myriad of money topics, opening the doors of financial wisdom to the public. The journey has been nothing short of enlightening, not just for the attendees but for me as well, as each session unraveled new insights into the complex world of personal finance.?

However, it was the day after one such webinar that I encountered a request that would add a new layer to my understanding of human interaction. An attendee sent me an email, not with feedback or a question, but with a request for proof of attendance. The purpose? To claim CPD hours. This simple email, at first glance an administrative task, became a window into the delicate dance between giving and taking, sparking a reflection on generosity and entitlement.

When Free Isn’t Enough…

First and foremost, the request caught me by surprise. The notion that someone could claim CPD hours from a webinar that was offered freely had never crossed my mind. After all, the essence of these webinars was to disseminate knowledge and training without any cost.?

The concept of “asking for more” seemed to stretch beyond the bounds of what was already a generous offering. It was akin to extending a hand filled with gifts, only to find the other hand reaching back, hoping for something extra. This moment was a gentle nudge, prompting me to reflect on the nature of value exchange and the expectations that come with free resources.

The Sambal Principle — The Human Nature of Wanting More

Let’s ponder the logic for a moment. Imagine a scenario where a nasi lemak hawker, in an act of pure generosity, hands you a pack of rice for free. You’ve enjoyed the meal, savoring each bite, and as you finish, a thought crosses your mind. You turn to the hawker and say, “Can you pack some more free sambal for me, please?”?

This request, though small, encapsulates the essence of our interaction: the transition from receiving a gift to the expectation of more. It’s a moment that mirrors the attendee’s request, highlighting a fascinating aspect of human nature and our perceptions of value, generosity, and entitlement.

Givers vs. Takers in Our Lives

This thing reminded me of the idea that some people take from others and some give. We see this all the time in life.?

When you find yourself in the company of givers, every aspect of life seems to flow more smoothly. Tasks are accomplished with ease, mentorship and guidance are readily available, good advice flows freely, and mistakes are fewer and far between. Givers enrich our lives.

However, it’s the takers who often stand in stark contrast, always on the lookout to borrow, to ask, to take more than they give—if they give at all. Their presence challenges us, bringing with it lessons of patience, boundaries, and the true meaning of generosity. This dynamic, seen through the lens of my webinar and the request that followed, serves as a reminder of the balance we strive to maintain between giving and receiving.

How Givers Sustain Financial Education

In my line of business — providing financial education — I’m lucky to have the best supporters. They’re not just buying my courses, but they’re also sharing their knowledge in my webinars, hooking me up with cool people, and spreading the word about what I do.?

They’re my cheerleaders, spreading the word like wildfire and showering me with praise that keeps me going. And among these awesome people, there are a few who are extra special. I’m talking about the clients who send me money every month, no questions asked.

These super amazing people are the backbone of what I’m trying to do. Their kindness and generosity are off the charts! They make me believe that people can be really good and that the world isn’t such a bad place after all. They remind me that kindness is the norm, not the exception.

How the Takers Try to Take You Down

But it’s not all sunshine and rainbows because there are plenty of takers too. They’re everywhere:?folks who dive into the free stuff, never missing a webinar or a chance to grab some advice without thinking of giving something back.?

And then there are those who really push the limits—buying a course, only to ask for a refund just as the return period is about to close. Ouch, that hits my pocket hard with those credit card fees. Some even make a sport of it, repeating this cycle over and over.?

But what really gets to me are the ones who, after taking all they can, start bad-mouthing the work I do. They say my material is useless and mock anyone who actually buys into it, throwing around words like “idiot” or “water-fish” as if it’s all a big joke. Yeah, navigating through a sea of takers can get pretty tricky.

Givers Supporting Takers

I’ve come to terms with the reality of the situation: there are givers out there who actually end up helping the takers, too. Take this one customer of mine, for example—he’s already making millions a year, and definitely doesn’t need my course to pad his bank account. But he signs up anyway, telling me he just wants to support the mission to spread financial wisdom far and wide. It’s his way of throwing a lifeline to those who are just starting out and might be taking more than they’re giving right now.?

So, I asked this guy, “What’s the point of paying for my financial courses? Why not just give the money to those who need it?”

And he’s like, “Just giving them money, it won’t fix anything. But if I sign up and you actually do well, then you’ll be able to teach them what they need to know.”

Pretty cool, right? It’s a reminder that sometimes, the line between giving and taking isn’t as clear-cut as we think.

Takers Turn Givers

Starting off as a taker is pretty common. It’s like the first step on a longer journey. But here’s the thing—being a giver isn’t all about opening your wallet. We’ve all got something awesome to share. Maybe you can’t donate cash, but what about the stuff that’s just as precious? Your time, what you know, or just being there to guide someone can be gold.?

These are the kinds of gifts that really matter, touching lives in ways money can’t. It’s about realizing that, hey, we can all make an impact, no matter what we have in our bank accounts.

Looping back to that whole email thing, it would’ve been cool if he threw in a little effort from his side, you know? Like, a quick heads-up on how my webinar fits into the whole CPD scheme, or maybe a simple template for that attendance proof. Just something to make the giving part easier for me. It’s all about showing a bit of respect for each other’s time.

And hey, I’m not just venting here. I’m sharing some wisdom on how to be a taker that everyone loves. Drop a comment, leave a nice review, tell your friends about us, or just help get the word out about the good stuff we’re doing. It’s about giving a little back in your own way, making the world a bit brighter for all of us. And everybody can be a generous giver!

You are a GIVER!

Ready to tip the scales? Join the conversation below and share your thoughts on this delicate dance between giving and taking in the realm of financial wisdom. Then, spread the word by sharing this post with friends and colleagues. Let’s ignite a movement of generosity and insight, together. Your voice matters—let it be heard!

Originally posted here.