Controlling / Self control

-       Controlling/ Self control

Control yourself is a little bit hard to do and keep practicing, so in order to fulfill your desire of controlling, if you can't control yourself all the time or sometimes, you start controlling others !!!

It gives you the pleasure of fake power, you think that you are better, you know more, you are stronger, you are in control !! 

Stop for a minute, listen to this words again, Think and analyze them. Apply these words on any situation you have been in or any story you know.

You will find that weak people only do this kind of control, weak souls not weak bodies.

Not enough education, not enough understanding, not enough flexibility, not enough willingness to change or accept others specially if they are different. (sometimes well educated people do the same by the way),Which can leads to discrimination.

Discrimination in everything, gender, ethnicity, color and religion. 

Yes religion discrimination is kind of control, I am better than you are; I know more than you do.

These are some examples of controlling in the power game.it is levels as well, it goes higher and higher with humans, as it is part of human nature.

 To get rid of it you need to work on yourself. Educate and teach yourself more, more in everything, and in every venue you are.

All the time and every time, until you discover your inner strength that will satisfy the eagerness of power and controlling.

 Which is controlling yourself in almost everything you do or say. This is the optimum result we are looking forward or towards it to accomplish and succeed and this is what we are going to be judged for or about in the Day of Judgment.

• Mind your own business; Self control:

Is good thing to practice, but it has been deviated from the main purpose of it, the aim was not to control others, just mind yourself, but again it has been used in the wrong way.

Imagine this scenario, you are standing in front of me and we can see each other but we are not talking, none of us started or initiated any kind of movement or talk. What do you call this or how do you describe it??

 You are ignoring me and I am ignoring you. Right?

Imagine now that each one of us is standing inside a circle. Which is his boundary and each of us start moving towards the other person to start talking or knowing him.

So the circles are getting closer and closer as we became friends now or getting to know each other more and more, then the circles got interfered or intersection, so we have common section now together , the similarities , the things we can do or enjoy together, but each one of us still has the rest of his circle standing there. That he can go to in the other side any time and do other things on his own or maybe interact with another circle (person).

 If each one of us kept this image in his back mind. This could be the solution and this is what it means mind your own business. Know your boundaries, stay within only the intersection that we have together, leave me room to move in the rest of my circle, you can tell me what you think, what you see that I cannot see from where I am standing.

 Explain things your way according to your experiences, but leave me the decision to decide what to do after all. This is what the creator did with us, explained, educated, and left us the decision to make.

The problem comes when we forgot about the rest of the circle and keep concentrating on only tiny intersection thinking it is the whole, this is how marriages were ruined, parenting damaged, relations cracked, etc.

Know your boundaries while you are interacting with everyone is the key. Not ignoring or staying away claiming that you are minding your own business.

Humans; were created the same but with different knowledge so they can interact and know each other, discover what you have that I do not, the target is to interact, interchange to complete what is missing. Imagine if you have everything, all what you need or want? What would be the reason or motive or the purpose of talking or dealing with others? Why should you do it? What for?

However, you interact or deal with others because you are seeking or looking for one missing part or one thing you do not have, cannot do, but they can do, or they have.

This is to be applied; in business, friendship, parenting, marriage, and all human relations in general.

Interaction is required, but knowing your boundaries, maintains healthy good lasting intersections/ interactions.

Noran Zahran