Content is king-sized

Hey Jimmy, can you give me a hand over here? I’ve got this giant freakin’ box and I need to fill it with stuff. You got any stuff?

You kiddin’? I’ve got a ton of useless junk lying around. But why are you trying to fill the box?

Because it’s here. And it’s huge. And all those other folks with huge boxes are filling theirs, so you know, when in Rome, amirite?

We’re in Toledo, Phil.

Yeah, yeah, can you just help me dump every imaginable piece of garbage into this oversized receptacle already? 

Alright, alright. Hand me a shovel.

Here ya go. Whoa, you weren’t kidding, you do have a ton of stuff with no redeemable value whatsoever. 

Told ya. We’ll cram the crap out of this colossal container in no time. 

Now you’re getting it, Jim-bo.

Yeah, it’s kinda fun.

Sure is! Oh hey, would you look at that, an old IBM Selectric typewriter, haven’t seen one of those in a while.

Dude, that’s just the tip of the irrelevant iceberg. I’ve got a steaming pile of pointless product ready to jam up in that giant crate. A bagful of old duvet covers, a few bushels of baked beans, 12 years of Popular Mechanics from the 70s and 80s, and ooh, check this out!

Whoa!

Right? When’s the last time you saw this many sporks in one place?

Taco Bell in Akron, 1997?

Ha, they wish. Load ‘em in, Phil. 

Sure thing. Hey, you better run and grab more stuff.

What? This box is bursting at the seams already.

Yeah, yeah. But I’ve got 100 more of ‘em coming in. And that’s just today. 

I think we’re gonna need more people. With a lot more stuff. 

I love stuff.

Who doesn’t?

Don’t know, don’t care. 

Preach, brother.