Consumed by Work

We all need to be gainfully employed. But how much work is too much work? There is so much written about the value of work, workplace culture, work-life-balance and to do one's best at work to succeed. So I don't want to lecture you about all these as I have a life at stake to talk about here.

I have a close friend who is highly qualified and is in the Engineering sector. He also happens to be a migrant who is fully committed to doing his best at work. He is recognized by his bosses as the best worker and has been given a highly-paid and senior position. He loves his job and his passion for quality is par excellence. But at what cost?

I rarely see him at home because work is his life and is part of the Asian work ethic. He goes to work early and comes home late in the evening. He is so tired that he goes to bed as soon as he gets home, often skipping meals. Visually there are bags under his eyes that soon may reach his feet. Bloodshot eyes hide what lies within. He just looks knackered. What would you do as a friend?

I had spoken to him about this before but his dedication to work knows no bounds. So I was compelled to write to him this email.

"Dear xxxxxx

I am writing because I am concerned about you sir. What does this verse below from the Bible mean to you?

What good will it be for someone to gain the whole world, yet forfeit their soul? Or what can anyone give in exchange for their soul? – The Bible

From what I know and have observed, you are a smart, well-qualified, compassionate and hard worker. You have been blessed with a great job and recognized for your talents. But you are working too hard and burning the candle at both ends. Long hours at work, lack of sleep while the bosses and workers leave work at 5.00pm. You hardly have any time to have a life outside work.

In my 30 years' career as a manager in NZ, I have seen many of my colleagues who worked like you. They became very successful and wealthy. The world recognized and adored them. They lived lavish lives, had fancy cars, lived in elite suburbs etc. But they suffered poor health, heart problems, broken marriages, family problems, mental illness and even one of my colleagues was found dead at his desk at work the next morning.

Is your job worth your life? Do you live to work or work to live? The law DOES NOT REQUIRE you to work like you are doing. I don’t want you to be found dead at work or at home either sir. I don’t want you to die before me sir? Please do not invite me to your funeral.

What options do you have?

1. Re-evaluate you priorities.
2. Review your work-life-balance.
3. Talk to your boss and tell him that you cannot continue to work long hours or meet their expectations.
4. Find another company where you will have a better work-life balance.
5. Change your career and do something else.

If I can help you in any way, do call me and talk to me. As a brother, I wanted to take this time to write to you before something bad happens to you.

You have a choice and if you don’t make a choice, that in itself is a choice".

Was my letter appropriate? What would you have done differently? Has this prompted you to do something about your work-life-balance or are you going to write to your friend?