Conspiracy Theories of Toxic Employees

When drama is running low, vulnerable narcissists in a work setting seemingly always find new and imaginative ways to seek attention by creating conspiracies out of thin air.

As mentioned in the previous post on electronic calendar monitoring, physical surveillance is another tactic of monitoring and tracking my colleague deployed at times. In this anecdote, her target was a former manager for whom she had multiple grievances.

Over six years, she had significant issues with each and every manager. As a central figure in her inner circle over six years, I heard a litany of issues (50/50 on what was real) about this particular manager that ranged from his gender-biased comments, his weak management style to personal family stories of his challenging sibling relationship. The feelings were mutual, as I described in this column on manipulating the truth.

When it came to gossip about someone (and I mean anyone - family, co-worker, leaders), she viewed all the personal secrets as if it was currency and took pleasure to overshare other people's problems. In hindsight, these were all signs of serial bully in the workplace.

Gossip Feeds Into Conspiracy Development

Along with the gossip, conspiracies were not far behind in leveling up for my colleague against a target. Conspiracies with a vulnerable narcissist was like a moth attracted to light - they are very drawn to a point of harming themselves and their target.

Conspiracies were part of her every day activity and she excelled at taking a couple of "data" points and conjuring a conspiracy out of thin air to the point where she believed 100% into her personal ideation.

From the research I have read, this comes from a place of paranoia, control and a vulnerability mentality. My co-worker had multiple conspiracies running through her mind simultaneously while seeking out more information to build her case against someone. I know I was a victim in this spiraling up rumination.

The Tale of Surveillance & Conspiracy Development

It was probably for a two-week stretch (or more), where my colleague "noticed" a pattern of her former manager being gone for extensive periods of time away from his office.

To be honest, we worked at a very large campus and meetings at a multinational giant could take a few hours, especially for senior leaders. Furthermore, a meeting could be located in a variety of locations far away from his office in the large footprint of office space, but somehow she had a bead on his pattern.

I do not know how long she was monitoring him to notice that he was not in his office or the entire building for periods of time before she surmised that he was off campus, as she was tracking his car movements from the parking lot.

Is this normal office behavior? Here is more to the tale ...

"Where is going? What is he doing? This is so weird!"

Once my colleague picked up the pattern of the senior manager leaving the campus, she would peer from a second floor building window to watch the parking lot from building to track his whereabouts. (Again, no binoculars were involved)

It really bothered my colleague not knowing where her former manager was doing out of the office.? It was unreal watching her monitor his big red pickup truck of the senior manager. She got carried away in the spying while spreading the news of his movements.?

She was energized by her sleuth activity and creating a stir along the way in speculation with operation colleagues - including me. She would note his whereabouts to others.

So, Where's Mikey?

With the buildup of gossip and conspiracy that was bantered about where Mikey was going, all the rumors came to a screeching halt when it was discovered he was spending afternoons volunteering at nearby non-profit where he was a board member - an organization whose mission is "to motivate and mobilize the church and the community to care for orphans and vulnerable children." With that lackluster conspiracy concluding, it would just mean a new one was going to be developed by my colleague. It was a cycle.

Moral Of the Story For Me, Colleagues and Workplace Investigators

The drama that energized my colleague was unsettling. By most corporate policies (tracking/monitoring other employees/managers), this would be a clear violation but something she put into practice with others - including me. I will detail this in another article.

Needless to say, this is a very unhealthy condition that gripped my colleague, and I hated to see her fall victim to her own condition while harming others unjustly. Thus, I share these stories to help others to understand the patterns that I failed to recognize far too late.

I played devil's advocate to her clouded views of co-workers and leaders, but she was a bloodhound to concoct anything to build up her case over time when it came to her make-believe foes.

Non-confirming facts would be disregarded with three or more half-truths to negate the one fact that I would try to establish. Unfortunately, she would become more passionate with gossip and conspiracy by searching for more "evidence". It was a loser's game to get her to move off the narrative that she created, as she would expound upon her case to her inner circle to believe and adopt against a target. I do not believe many of her inner circle ever challenged her enough in my case, as I may have been the only person who tried to talk her down from her "pseudo-enemies."

How Someone 'Feels' Does Not Make It Factual

Just because someone "feels" a certain way does not make it factual and right. My colleague was in a constant state of being uncomfortable for six years. I would know. As such, to find some level of comfort, I believe vulnerable narcissists create multiple narratives about others to feel a level of control, to quell paranoia and to mitigate their own emotional dysregulation.

Unfortunately, like in my case, if all their passive aggressive and escalated tactics do not push down all those unwanted feelings, there is hell to be paid for their target. Reconciliation and mediation are no longer on the table.

When emotions of a vulnerable narcissist become so overwhelming, being simply cordial (image below asking to be cordial) is not an option. The only option is going nuclear with the help of accomplices and the weaponization of HR. She handles matters that are very well scripted and predictable by all academic research about such toxic individuals.

Colleagues, managers and especially HR investigators need to to review this lesson. Bullies are very adept at manipulating accomplices and HR to support their conspiracies and covert tactics. If you do not adequately address them, they will continue to wreak havoc even in the latter stages of their career if unchecked.

JNJ's HR specialists Clarke and Sisto and all workplace investigators need to understand that there are employees who make claims against others that are the true troublemakers. HR professionals need to realize that these serial work arsonists do exist and it is up to them to recognize and take action appropriately and not to simply rely on a very one-sided story. We need less workplace investigators like Clarke and Sisto.

Tiya LaCroix Susan Smith Pamela Koelbel RN MSN(FNP/CNS) MPHA????????????????????? Kimberly Smith, LPC, NCC Maureen Kyne Trevor Leahy (Lee Hee)???? Rasul Foolad Jonathan Wilson LLB(Hons) BA(Hons) Matthew West Linen Sanyal Tom Renk Chris Edward Jensen Lisa Johnson FAIA, LEED AP, Associate DBIA Stewart Leckie, PFP Buddy Kassoum Lisa G. Judy Carmody MA, CPA Amy Chapple Georgina Jones Veronica M Satyendra (Satya) Jillian Evanoff Chelsey Brooke Cole, LPC-MHSP, CPTT, RPT Joan R. Janice Mah (馬秀瑜), MBA Peter Myerscough Caroline Mrozla-Toscano, PhD Stephen Sagar MD Jennifer Toettcher Linda Crockett - Psychological Safety Specialist MSW, RSW, Consultant, Trainer, Coach, Therapist Peter Callister Jen Fraser, PhD Jacquie Abram Nanette (Nan) A. Cowardin-Lee, PhD Dr Jason Price Catching_Bees Lauri M. L., M.S. Workplace Psychological Safety Act Workplace Bullying Institute National Workplace Bullying Coalition Stop Hurt at Work

#GreaterGood #MentalHealth #LotsOfEmpathy #Knowledge #Understanding #Learning #Feelings #Emotions #Body #Identity #endbullying #bullyprevention #nomore bullies #standuptobullying #bullyingawareness #bullyingstopshere #bekindnotcruel #zerotoleranceforbullying #stopbullying