Connecting with Beth Bengtson

How have relationships influenced your professional development and leadership style??

I can honestly say that Working for Women would not exist without the relationships I have built along the way in my career.?

I remember being at a conference of business women years ago, and the speaker asked how many people in the room made time for others when they reached out and asked for help; the majority of hands went up. And then she asked, “How many of you reach out and ask for the help you need?” Far fewer hands appeared.

The first thing I had to do when developing Working for Women was reach out to my network and ask for their time and feedback on the concept. It was quite uncomfortable for me, but the connections from each of those conversations got us to where we are now – working for women. More importantly, those connections have opened doors to opportunities for women we serve across our network.?

Something else that was very powerful came back from these conversations,? I had a clear vision of the organization I wanted to create, and why it was needed?— and I was busy looking for someone else to lead it. The feedback that came back to me, over and over again, was, “But Beth, YOU should lead it.” At that time, my definition of a leader was someone who was extroverted, dynamic, and charismatic — and I am none of those things. It was only through relationships with people who saw in me what I couldn’t see in myself that I realized, taking the role of president was the right thing to do. Since those early days, those relationships have been critical to the success and growth of Working for Women. For one thing, a number of former colleagues and clients have supported the organization, whether by signing on as corporate partners or making individual donations. The relationships I’ve formed with our nonprofit partners are also essential; listening deeply to what they tell me about their front line experiences, and to the stories they share from the women they serve, help me make sure that we are continuing to meet the needs of marginalized women in the most impactful ways possible. I’d like to add one more thought about how relationships have strengthened me as a leader – my style is very oriented towards working in partnership, so learning to go beyond my comfort, and being supported by existing relationships, has allowed me to add and build upon new relationships to pursue the mission of Working for Women.

You can see this in the projects we’re part of,?with corporate and nonprofit partners, and with other organizations that work to grow women’s economic independence.? For example, I’ve been engaged with The Case for Childcare with NationSwell , Pivotal Ventures , and others; and have sparked conversations aimed at changing the conversation about women and their economic power.?

Do you have any tips for maintaining and building strong relationships??

One of my biggest life learnings came early in my career when I was head of client services for an agency and realized that business relationships required the same things as personal relationships to thrive. Too often we think of business relationships in purely transactional terms, but in fact, all relationships are like plants: Just as healthy plants require attention, water, soil and light to thrive, strong relationships require shared commitment, attention, and healthy communication.?

For me, communication is the key element; to be in a healthy relationship requires a willingness to listen, be vulnerable, and be honest in every interaction. For example, I recently felt uncomfortable when it seemed like one of our partners had made a choice that might negatively impact our future funding. I fretted and stewed over it, and started writing an email, before reminding myself to lean into the relationship we’d built over so many years. Instead of sending the email filled with my concerns, I emailed to ask for a few minutes to talk. Those few minutes of talking turned everything around.? What felt like an uncomfortable situation became an opportunity to expand our funding, while deepening our relationship and connection.?

As Susan states in her book, The Lost of Art of Connecting, “A relationship is a relationship - whether it’s built through business conducted across the boardroom table or over a meal shared at my kitchen table.” I couldn't agree more.

How have you intentionally built inclusiveness into your circles??

You hit the nail on the head here by using the word “intentionally” in this question. You have to make an intentional effort if you want to include people with diverse identities and perspectives in your life and business.? Inclusiveness requires curiosity, and it takes time, commitment and a willingness to really listen when you hear things that don’t line up 100% with your own way of thinking.??

I think the work that we do at Working for Women does exactly this by bringing together people from all walks of life and economic levels to have a common experience. One of the greatest gifts from our programming is to connect people from different backgrounds and help them see that they are not all that different.

What community or communities are you proud to be a part of??

I am very proud to be a part of the community we have built here at Working for Women. Our relationships span the business world and the nonprofit world, all with the shared purpose of removing the barriers that keep women from marginalized communities from entering and staying in the workforce —?in other words, from achieving financial independence. There is something about connecting with people who have a shared purpose that immediately allows for deeper connections to develop quickly. When we bring the business community together with the women we serve it allows us to see that we all want the same thing: to feel financially secure while supporting ourselves, our families, and our communities.

Who’s a Connector that's made a difference in your life?

As I mentioned earlier, this organization would not be possible without the connections I have to so many people in my life —?people like Hensley Evans, Anjana Pursnani, Michelle Mirchandani, and Debbie Botwick. I worked with all of them during other parts of my career journey and they took a leap of faith with me in creating Working for Women.

The truth is, I think being a connector is a gift we can all give each other. I am grateful for each and every one of the people in my life who has made a connection that got us where we are today —?working for women, together.

It's an honor to feature inspiring change-makers across industries who share their stories and words of wisdom about how to build meaningful relationships. Catch up on #CONNECTED with our previous guests, including Michelle Gadsden-Williams , Ebony Beckwith , Diana Verde Nieto , and more!

Susan McPherson is a serial connector, seasoned communicator and founder and CEO of McPherson Strategies, a communications consultancy focused on the intersection of brands and social impact. She is the author of The Lost Art of Connecting: The Gather, Ask, Do Method for Building Meaningful Relationships.

Follow Susan on LinkedIn, Twitter and Instagram and order her new book, The Lost Art of Connecting, also available on Kindle and Audiobook.