Connect First, Lead Second: Building Trust Through Warmth and Competence

It’s a chilly February evening in upstate New York, the year is 1934. A cruel winter and America’s Great Depression are biting hard. Unemployment is rife, business is uncertain, the economy has collapsed and families are struggling to make ends meet. Amidst these hardships, one unifying ceremony keeps society together. Huddled in their living rooms, gathered in company break rooms, and assembled in their offices, families, office workers and management teams are anxiously waiting for for Franklin D. Roosevelt's weekly Fireside Chat. The soft glow of the radio casts a warm light as they lean in, eager for reassurance and guidance.

“Ladies and Gentlemen… the President of the United States,......” crackles the voice of the presenter over the radio. A few seconds later, the man himself speaks….. “My fellow Americans… I’d like to talk to you about banking…” Roosevelt's voice comes to life, calm and steady, bridging the distance between the leader and his people. His words are a lifeline, bringing hope and trust in a time of uncertainty.

This scene shows the exceptional ability of a great leader educating and building bonds during challenging times. Roosevelt is influencing and inspiring. Great leaders draw not only on their competence through knowledge but also on their power to build trust and forge meaningful connections.

Roosevelt's success lay not only in his policies and vision but equally in his ability to connect with the American people through these intimate broadcasts. The concept of "Connect, Then Lead," is a timeless leadership strategy, reminding us that true leadership starts with connection.

We judge eachother in two ways

At the core of effective leadership lies the duality of warmth and competence. We instinctively ask ourselves two critical questions when interacting with others:

Can I trust this person? - This question relates to the person's warmth, their ability to connect and empathise.

Can I respect this person? - This refers to their competence, their ability to deliver results and demonstrate expertise.

For leaders, balancing these two dimensions is essential. Focusing solely on competence without demonstrating warmth will create an environment of fear and disengagement. On the other hand, displaying warmth without the backbone of competence might undermine a leader's credibility and effectiveness.

Warmth is a primal instinct.

To influence others effectively, You must start with warmth. Warmth facilitates trust, it enhances communication, and encourages the absorption of ideas. “Can I trust this person? Can I trust their ideas?“?

When leaders project warmth, they create a foundation of trust that paves the way for their competence to be recognized and valued.

Building your foundation of trust

Trust is the bedrock of any meaningful relationship, and it is especially critical in leadership. Before people decide what they think of your message, they decide what they think of you. Establishing warmth first ensures that when leaders exhibit their strength and competence, it is seen as a welcome reassurance rather than a threat.

Practical steps to make meaningful connections

Listen Actively: Show genuine interest in others' perspectives. Listening actively not only builds trust but also provides valuable insights.

Show Empathy: Understand and acknowledge the feelings and concerns of others. Empathy bridges the gap between leaders and their teams.

Be Authentic: Authenticity fosters trust. Be yourself and let others see your genuine self. People are smart. Remember that.

Communicate Clearly: Clear and open communication establishes transparency and trust. Say what you mean, mean what you say.

Build Relationships: Invest time in building and nurturing relationships. Trust is built over time through consistent and positive interactions.?

Leadership as a gift, not a threat

Once warmth is established, a leader's strength and competence become a source of reassurance and inspiration. The adage "connect first" transforms leadership from being a potential threat to a powerful gift. It allows leaders to guide their teams with a blend of empathy and expertise, fostering an environment where everyone can thrive.

True leadership balances warmth and competence. By connecting first, leaders build trust and inspire confidence, turning their strength into a gift that guides and reassures, fostering a thriving environment.

Be like Roosevelt. Uncertainty is all around us. Connect first, trust your team and lead. Remove as much uncertainty as you can. Build those bridges of trust and help people walk across them.