These Are Confusing Times for Our Kids.
Every April, I sit down to reflect on the importance of Child Abuse Prevention Month -- what that means to the children of our Valley, what that means to the victims of child abuse that we see in our emergency room -- and how every month should really be Child Abuse Prevention Month.
But this April, we find ourselves consumed by a pandemic, the likes of which few of us have ever experienced in our lifetimes. To say that the impact of COVID-19 -- on our organizations, on our personal lives, on our own families, on our fundamental ways of life, and on our communities as we deal with the impacts of this invisible enemy -- has been profound and swift is an understatement.
There is a convergence between these two important challenges.
Many children are confused by the current events of COVID-19. Their schools are closed, their instruction is now online, their meals are available for pick up and their friends are far from them. The pandemic has caused tremendous stress on our families as they deal with these disruptions -- and, for many Valley residents, one or more parent or guardian has lost their job and is worried about how to pay for shelter, food and utilities. It will be hard for kids to complete online studies if their family ends up living in their car.
Experts warn of the likelihood of increased incidences of child abuse as we fight COVID-19, particularly during these shelter-in-place orders. The very recommendations useful to control the spread of COVID-19 -- isolation and social distancing -- will make it harder for child abuse victims to seek help or to be noticed -- by a teacher, a neighbor, a pastor. For more kids than we would like to count, “home” is not a safe place for them to be. We know that situations of increasing family stress are hard for our children under the best of circumstances and, in the most extreme cases, they can lead to increased incidence of child abuse.
COVID-19 and child abuse converge certainly around increased stress on children and families. But might they converge in other ways?
As a community, in very short order, we have adjusted our own personal behaviors in response to COVID-19. It is no longer acceptable to stand close to someone in the grocery checkout line. We no longer gather in large groups, we greet each other with other signs besides a handshake or a hug, and we wash our hands more times during the day than ever before.
If we can change our behaviors to protect ourselves and our neighbors from COVID-19, then we can make the same commitment to change our behaviors to protect our kids. What if we took the commitment to “stop the spread” of COVID-19 and applied that to stopping child abuse?
Ending child abuse is not someone else’s responsibility. It is my responsibility. And yours. And every neighbor, teacher, faith leader, police officer, store owner, parent’s responsibility.
So what can we do?
Learn the signs. Child abuse occurs everywhere. It doesn’t know limits of zip codes, how much someone earns or what kind of house they live in.
If you see something, say something. If you suspect a child is being neglected or abused, report your concerns to authorities. It is better to be wrong than sorry.
If you need help as a parent or caregiver, seek it. There is no shame in asking for help. There is far more harm to your children if you do not.
Support the families around you. Offer parents the resources they need. Talk about child abuse prevention in your family, your schools, workplaces and places of worship. Volunteer your time to organizations working to help kids who are victims of child abuse. Advocate for kids at the local, state and federal levels of government.
Above all, be a voice for those smallest, most precious members of our community who often have no voice at all.
From our vantage point, it is difficult to witness a child going through an illness or injury, but it’s particularly devastating when we see a child who has been deliberately harmed.
At Valley Children’s, we know that every child has a future worth fighting for -- whether it is against child abuse or a pandemic. We will get there together. Our kids are counting on us.
This op-ed originally appeared in the Fresno Bee on Sunday, April 26, 2020.