CONFLICTED CAREER DIRECTION & IT'S IMPACT ON A MARRIAGE

One challenging thing for most people is the clarity about what they want in life.

Many people suffer from what I call the 'shining object syndrome', a situation where every idea appeals to an individual and it becomes difficult for them to stay on one thing until it has succeed.

They keep switching and having one big awesome idea per week. The biggest issue challenging the world and in particular the world of work and business is not the absence of information but like the absence of clarity.

When an individual isn't clear about what they want and with that conflicted situation now enter into a marriage relationship, there is likely going to be a serious problem along the line. The day it is going to happen depends on many factors including how long they can keep the charade before the bubble will burst.

This issue was brought to the fore again for me when I watch the 2019 movie by Scarlet Ingrid Johansson, the American Actress titled - Marriage Story. She met her husband Charlie when she left LA for New York and fell in love almost immediately and they eventually got married. It's a @netflix movie, you should see if you have not.

Here are the lessons I picked up from watching the movie:

1. Never make a permanent life decision like getting married when you are not certain what career, job, purpose or calling you want to pursue: because we are still in the process of finding who we are and what we are supposed to do with our lives and therefore this will impact who we should be with or not.
2. Some people fall in love with the idea of being married and not necessarily in love with a particular person, its just the concept of being married or not been alone: so many people who are married are in it because of family, peers and societal expectation and pressure, therefore when the chips are down, they would take the easy way out.
3. Open communication is critical to the success of any marriage, couples must find a way to discuss their issues and develop the skill to comfortable with having difficult conversation. Couples must try not to play the 'avoidance' game. What you don't deal with in the short term, might be cemetery of your marriage.

Communication is the basis of life - Edwin Louis Cole

Therefore, I usually would recommend a clarity session before we agree on what a client wants to do, that way they become a lot more clearer about which direction they want to head with their marriage. Because we are pro marriage in our divorce coaching business, which is why we also provide services in counseling, therapy and mediation, so we clients can explore all available option before heading for divorce.

Towards the end of the movie, after they have had an almost messy divorce, it was clear that they still have a thing or two for each other, you could see the disappointment in their faces of 'we could have tried harder to save our marriage'

Let us help you gain clarity so that your transition can be a transformational experience for you.