Conflict Resolution, Emotional Intelligence, and the Power of Calling In; Building Inclusive Workplaces

As workplaces evolve and seek to become more diverse, so do the challenges of managing conflicts and fostering true inclusion. This means moving beyond surface-level box-ticking and creating a culture of inclusion where the workforce thrives, not just turns up and survives. Whether it's differences in cultural backgrounds, working styles, or personal values, conflicts can be inevitable. But how we navigate these moments is what truly defines an inclusive environment.

This article is born out of my personal reflections during my Level 3 ILM Leadership and Management course with TRS, where I've been exploring the vital role of emotional intelligence and conflict resolution in leadership. One thing has become clear: how we choose to handle difficult situations speaks volumes about the kind of culture we create.

At the heart of it all is emotional intelligence and the subtle but powerful distinction between calling people in and calling them out.

Emotional Intelligence: Leading with Empathy

Emotional intelligence (EI) is central to conflict resolution and inclusivity. It's about understanding not just your emotions but also those of others. When you’re in a leadership role, you must be aware of the emotions swirling in your team—spoken or unspoken. People may not always voice their frustrations, but they show them in their behaviour, performance, or disengagement.

Emotionally intelligent leaders recognise these signals early on. They don’t shy away from difficult conversations but approach them with empathy, patience, and a deep understanding of the dynamics at play. Emotional intelligence allows us to navigate workplace tensions with tact, helping everyone involved feel heard and valued. By building an environment where emotional awareness is the norm, you cultivate trust, essential for fostering inclusivity. I often say it's important to read the room. Look for cues, non-verbal communication, and the vibes and energy you can feel. Read the room.

When conflicts arise, emotionally intelligent leaders can ask: What’s really happening here? What are the emotions driving this tension? This awareness allows us to focus on the problem rather than attacking the person, which leads to more effective resolutions.

The Power of Calling In, Not Calling Out

We’ve all experienced situations where someone says or does something inappropriate or offensive, and the immediate response might be to call them out—publicly correcting their behaviour. While this approach may seem necessary, it often leaves the other person feeling defensive, embarrassed, or humiliated. The issue might be addressed in the moment, but the relationship is left fractured.

Calling in, however, is a more empathetic approach. It’s about having that difficult conversation in a private, respectful manner. You invite the person to reflect on their behaviour, providing them with the opportunity to learn and grow without fear of being publicly criticised. This not only preserves the relationship but also encourages a culture of learning, where mistakes are viewed as opportunities for personal and professional development.

For example, I once facilitated a session on sensitive topics like political values. Afterwards, a colleague privately raised a concern about how my words might be perceived by others with different political views. This was a classic case of calling in rather than calling out—had they raised this issue in front of everyone, it could have led to defensiveness or even embarrassment. Instead, we had a constructive conversation that helped me understand their perspective while realising that some concerns may not have been as valid as initially perceived. The key was the approach—they sought clarification before jumping to conclusions.

In an inclusive workplace, calling in fosters a space where people feel safe to speak their minds and make mistakes, knowing they will be guided, not shamed, for their growth.

Creating an Inclusive Culture Through Conflict Resolution

Conflict doesn’t have to be a barrier to progress—it can be a pathway to deeper understanding, improved relationships, and stronger team cohesion. By embedding emotionally intelligent conflict resolution strategies, leaders can transform moments of tension into opportunities for learning and inclusivity.

Here’s a Conflict Resolution Toolkit I have put together to help you reflect on how to integrate these practices into your workplace:

Conflict Resolution Toolkit: Practical Steps

• Pause Before Reacting: When a conflict arises, resist the urge to respond immediately. Take a moment to reflect on your emotions and the situation. Ask yourself: How can I approach this to resolve the issue without escalating it?
• Call In, Not Out: If you notice an issue, address it privately with the person involved. Ask clarifying questions to understand their intentions before assuming the worst. Focus on education and growth rather than blame.
• Active Listening: Truly listen to what the other person is saying rather than preparing your response. This shows respect and lets you fully understand their perspective, which can help de-escalate the situation.
• Separate the Person from the Problem: When resolving conflict, focus on the issue, not the individual. Criticising a person’s character rather than their behaviour only leads to defensiveness. Instead, frame the conversation around solving the problem together.
• Use “I” Statements: When discussing the conflict, talk about how you feel and its impact on you or the team rather than pointing fingers. For example, “I felt concerned when this happened,” rather than, “You made a mistake.”
• Set Clear Expectations: After resolving the conflict, ensure everyone understands the agreed-upon solutions and what’s expected moving forward. Clarity reduces the chances of future misunderstandings.
• Follow Through: Once a resolution is reached, take immediate action to implement it. Consistent follow-through is crucial to building trust and demonstrating that conflict can be resolved constructively.

Reflective Thinking Points:

How do you currently respond to conflicts in the workplace? Could emotional intelligence help you manage these situations more effectively?

Have you ever called someone in rather than calling them out? How did that change the outcome?

Does your workplace encourage open dialogue when tensions arise, or do people shy away from speaking up?

What steps could you take to create a culture where everyone feels safe to express themselves without fear of public criticism?

Building High-Performing, Inclusive Teams

A high-performing team is one where every member feels valued and heard and can contribute their best work. Conflict resolution, when done right, strengthens these teams rather than weakens them. And emotional intelligence is the glue that holds it all together.

Understanding your team's diverse learning styles, strengths, and areas for development is essential for nurturing an inclusive culture. When you know your team’s unique needs, you can tailor your leadership approach to maximise their potential. Whether working with a kinesthetic learner who thrives on hands-on tasks or an auditory learner who processes information best through discussions, acknowledging and embracing these differences allows you to harness each person’s strengths.

As I’ve explored in my ILM course, leadership isn’t about dictating from above. It’s about empowering your team to collaborate, share ideas, and take ownership of their growth. This inclusive mindset fosters innovation and allows your team to reach new heights of performance.

Final Thoughts

Creating an inclusive workplace doesn’t happen by chance. It requires intentionality, emotional intelligence, and a commitment to resolving conflicts that bring people together rather than tearing them apart. By adopting a mindset of calling in, using conflict as a tool for growth, and leading with empathy, we can build workplaces where everyone feels empowered to bring their full selves to the table.

I’ve personally found these principles to be invaluable, both in my leadership journey and in the teams I’ve worked with. As I continue my Level 3 ILM Leadership and Management course, I reflect on how we can lead in ways that prioritise performance and inclusivity.

If your organisation is ready to embrace these approaches, I can offer consultancy services as a Transformative Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion (TEDI) Consultant. Feel free to send a message or connection request and explore how to build more inclusive, emotionally intelligent workplaces.

Ifza Shakoor Transformative Equity, Diversity, and Inclusion (TEDI) Consultant

*images sourced from freepik.com