Confident in Yourself: It Begins When You End External Validation
Brad Wiens
Technical Career Coach | Sr. Talent Acquisition I Recruiter NXP- Expertise | Corporate, RPO, Agency | Semiconductor, Information Technology, Cyber Security, Electrification | LinkedIn Sourcing | Writer-Career Coach |
“The moment you stop seeking validation from others is the moment you begin to realize your worth.” – Unknown.
Imagine a life where your confidence isn’t tied to the approval of others, where your decisions are driven by what you believe is right, not by what others think. This is the power of ending external validation—a shift that allows you to step into your full potential. Letting go of the need for approval from others is more than just freeing; it’s a profound step towards becoming your most authentic and empowered self.
Why It Matters
1. You Build Unshakable Self-Trust
Relying on your judgment strengthens the foundation of your confidence. When you stop seeking others’ approval, you begin to trust your inner voice, recognizing your worth without needing constant validation. You know your value comes from within, and this self-trust becomes the bedrock for authentic confidence.
2. You Embrace Your True Self
Seeking validation often leads to conforming to others' expectations. This can mask who you truly are, making it harder to form meaningful relationships or pursue opportunities that resonate with your values. By ending the need for validation, you embrace your uniqueness and, in doing so, attract people and experiences that align with your true self.
3. You Experience Mental Freedom
Constantly worrying about others’ opinions creates unnecessary anxiety and self-doubt. When you let go of the need for external approval, you clear your mind, allowing more mental space for positive, productive thoughts. You become free to focus on what truly matters to you without being weighed down by the fear of judgment.
4. You Take Control of Your Life
Ending the need for validation gives you the confidence to make decisions based on your values, not others. This shift puts you in the driver’s seat of your life, empowering you to steer your path with greater purpose and intention. You no longer rely on external forces to dictate your direction.
Actions to Take
1. Self-Reflection: Know Your Values
To start building your inner confidence, take time to reflect on what matters most to you. Understand your values, beliefs, and desires, and let them guide your actions, not the opinions of others.
? Example: Keep a journal where you write about moments when you felt proud of yourself without relying on external praise. This helps reinforce your inner sense of accomplishment.
2. Practice Daily Affirmations
Replace the need for external validation with affirmations that reinforce your self-worth. Positive self-talk can reshape the way you view yourself and build internal validation.
? Example: Begin each day by saying affirmations like, “I am worthy just as I am” or “I trust myself to make the right decisions.” These simple but powerful phrases can ground you in self-belief.
3. Engage in Mindfulness and Meditation
Mindfulness practices can help center you and foster a sense of inner calm. Meditation allows you to focus on the present moment, reducing the need for approval by cultivating self-acceptance and inner peace.
? Example: Dedicate 10 minutes daily to meditation or deep breathing exercises. As you practice, notice how much lighter you feel without the weight of others’ opinions.
4. Set Clear Boundaries
Protecting your energy is essential for maintaining self-confidence. Learning to say no to situations and people that drain your energy or impose their expectations on you is a powerful step toward reclaiming your autonomy.
? Example: If you’re invited to an event or task that doesn’t align with your values, politely decline. You’ll feel empowered by setting boundaries that prioritize your well-being.
5. Celebrate Your Small Wins
Internal validation grows when you start acknowledging and celebrating your achievements. No matter how small, recognizing your progress helps you rely less on external praise and more on your sense of accomplishment.
? Example: After completing a challenging project or reaching a personal goal, treat yourself to something that brings you joy, like a favorite meal or a fun activity. This reinforces your sense of self-worth without needing others to congratulate you.
Bottom Line:
Confidence begins when you stop seeking validation from others. By building self-trust, embracing your true self, freeing your mind from the burden of approval, and empowering your decisions, you pave the way for a more authentic, confident life. The journey starts by looking inward, recognizing your worth, and acting in alignment with your values. How will you reclaim your power today?
Stay Motivated: 3-Minute Inspiration for Busy People.
Reach out if I can help: https://www.dhirubhai.net/in/bradwiens/
"Action is the foundational principle to all success" - Pablo Picasso