Confidence

As a person, do you believe in yourself? Do you have faith in your abilities? Are you sure of your decision-making powers?

If the answer is YES, then you can be labelled as a confident person in life. Do not misunderstand it with over confidence or having an ego as they are very different from the genuine self-confidence.

Confidence is all about feeling comfortable in your true-self while having a knowledge about your worth as a unique human. The people in the society can notice the confidence in yourself. Most of the time, people who are confident about themselves are leaders in their respective communities or at workplaces.

So, this month I will share my ideas about confidence.

What happens when you lack confidence? Ultimately you rely on others for your existence and decision-making process. As a mentor and an education counsellor, I have seen many students with low confidence when making the right choice of career path catering their needs. It is great that you can look up to anybody who can guide/help you to go on your journey. But the final decision of your life should come from yourself. Relying on other parties can be sometimes dangerous as the people you look for advice can influence your decisions and they can manipulate you according to their agenda of life. Remember that you are the captain of your life ship and you are the main/primary decision maker in your life.

If you are confident, then there is a tendency that other people can be drawn into you, more likely to give respect and listen to what you say. Confidence is like an attractive jewel, that promotes relationships by connecting with others. What happens here is that confidence subconsciously alert the people around you hinting that they are in the presence of an individual who is sure about his/herself. This can be achieved by various means like from your appearance, the way you talk, walk, interact, non-verbal gestures, how you dress etc. People who project their confidence are more likely to become successful in life compared to others.

How do you gain confidence?

This is one of the common questions that I am asked over the years.

The fact is that no one is born confident. We become confident due to various reasons as well. We all have the ability to become confident and develop it as we mature irrespective of the way we grew up, where we live, gender, social status, economic status and many more.

As a person, I also have tried and failed many times to get my confidence. Just because I am confident, it does not imply that I am perfect. Actually, there is a room for mistakes too. No matter how many times you fail, confidence is all about how you build your trust repetitively. The fact is that confidence comes from years of trials. The mistakes you make will lead you to proficiency which is in hand in hand with eventual success.

Here are few things that I do to maintain my confidence to a satisfactory level.

• Have a positive and a happy mindset
• Accept who you are by respecting and loving yourself
• Get out from your comfort zone
• Be goal oriented
• Do things that you can enjoy and you are good at
• Do self-suggestions that you are in control
• Believe that you have the power to change your life
• Never procrastinate anything
• Take responsibility for your decisions even you are not 100% perfect
• Empower, encourage and motivate the people around yourself
• View problems as challenges and try to find ways to achieve success

By the end of the day, confidence shapes your real version as it helps you to be more like you. This transformation journey of yourself can be a tedious one but every step of it is worth enough to evolve into a better version.

(This article originally appeared in June 2023 issue of Probe)