Confession Time

I was a top notch, high grade, high functioning people pleaser of the tallest order.

Nothing was ever too much. I morphed into what I thought people needed from me, I delivered on their expectations and not mine. Everyone got a piece of me. It was always on, always available, how high can I jump type behaviour?

And that meant I was always on, always on the edge of a buckeroo moment wondering if what I was doing was enough, whether it was in my professional life running a business or personally too.

And the result: Doris, I burnt out. To a crisp. Crispier than a Walkers Cheese and Onion. (The king of all crisps; especially on a Dairy Lea butty on two slabs of white warbies; if you know, you know.)

I was a bit (lot) shouty and snappy in my family life, I was twitching with what needed to happen and running around serving every single sausage around and not serving myself. And I knew it wasn't JUST the dreaded perimenopause.

So I made a choice.

I invested in myself. In my own recovery, in resetting and refocussing. I reframed my expectations of myself. I set my boundaries and I started serving myself better instead of serving all the others. I set my boundaries and stuck to them and then I told other people what my boundaries were. (Btw, this is the bit most people forget to do.)

I worked on my value system with these values becoming my standard bearer for my integrity, decisions and action. I started showing up for me.

Once we nail our values, and we consistently act on our values, they become our true north of how we show up. It's a game-changer. It's also one of the core frameworks I teach within Rethinking Your Success.

The result: a high performing me, a high performing business and here's the gold; the cascade effect on my personal life has been I choose where to put my energy, time and effort. I have clarity and focus, I have boundaries and it's been refreshing and rewarding.

I'm also still shouty and snappy - turns out that's just who I am when the kids and husband ask 'what my thoughts are for tea' for the seventh billionth time.

Are you a people pleaser? Ever thought what you're saying no to when you're saying yes to everyone else?