Compliment yourself more & see what happens...

80% of professionals I asked said that they criticize themselves more often than they complement themselves.

Think about it for yourself. What do you do more of, criticize yourself or compliment yourself and more importantly what is the impact of that for you on how you live your life, what you step up to or not, what you go for or not, what you accept or not, what you change or not…

For sure, being self-critical is useful at certain moments. If you speak abruptly to your partner, your child, or your colleague, then having that critical voice inside your head about what you just did has a use. It builds awareness, triggers you to apologize, and helps you to communicate in a more correct manner going forward. Or maybe it's that you put on ‘too much’ weight and that critical self talk may propel to do something about it. So being self-critical has benefits and is needed on occasion.

The problem is that there are moments when it kicks in when we actually need the opposite. Maybe you just received tough feedback from your manager, or you didn’t get the role you interviewed for, or your intimate relationship just ended, or you’re just simply having a tough day or week … These are moments when we need to be more aware of what’s great about us and not just focus on what we should improve.

One way you can actively compliment yourself and boost your self-esteem and self-belief is create what I call your Wow list.

Very simple & will have you feeling incredible about who you are. Put yourself into a positive high energy state, which I usually do with participants with the help of energizing music ;-), then write out everything you’re good & great at, as well as all the qualities you like about yourself.

To give you an idea, a few I’ve heard include being a great listener, learn fast, optimistic, creative, disciplined, fun to be with, …

Note to your brain - for this exercise, it is not the time to be humble. It’s a time to be proud of who you are. Do it from the strong & proud version of you.

Note to yourself – this is not about being arrogant (no one likes arrogant people), but rather about being more aware of your qualities & strengths so you can tap into that version of you more easily.

If you’ve done the exercise, you’re now more aware of your qualities & strengths on a conscious level. The problem with that is that you need to think about them consciously going forward. Solution is a few lines below...

If you haven’t done it. Stop reading. Put on some energizing music, jump up & down / dance like crazy / walk … so you physically move in some way, grab a pen & paper and start writing your personal Wow List. It’s for your eyes only so write without any filter.

To help bring this version of you into your auto pilot, which is your subconscious, I have something I recommend you do in bed twice a day for the next week and will make you feel good. No, not that, something else :-)

Just before you fall asleep, and right when you wake up (before reaching for your phone), your subconscious brain is more accessible, as your conscious brain is not fully awake yet. Do this... Read through your list and let all what you are good or great at, as well as your incredible qualities sink in to your self identity. This is who you are. This is uniquely you. Own it and leverage it.

As it goes deeper into your subconscious, you’ll find that you start to act from this stronger, higher version of you more easily & more automatically. You'll quite down that critical self-talk, and more easily step up to challenges in life and go for your goals.

I have one ask. I would love to hear how this impacts you.

Note to reader - I love helping professionals get to the next level, so I'm launching my first public enrollment workshop in January (to date, they’ve only been available for teams or groups of professionals within organizations).

Check it out at Events | Trevor Lynch

To your success,

Trevor

I work with individuals & teams to boost their self belief, confidence, resilience & performance through my philosophy of Yes You Freakin’ Can, which is also the title of my book, workshops and speaker themes.

TREVOR LYNCH | Motivational Speaker, Trainer and Coach, Author