Compersion at Work

Compersion is “an empathetic state of happiness and joy experienced when another individual experiences happiness and joy.” Compersion comes up a lot in discussions about personal relationships, but it applies equally well to our careers.

And LinkedIn is the perfect container to practice compersion.

Every day, we receive messages in our feed that bring tidings of joy:

"Your connection Matt was just promoted!"

"Rachael got a new job, congratulate her!"

It's exciting, thrilling... but it can also be maddening for those of us who just went through the opposite.

Last Friday I was laid off from my position at RealWear. The company has a phenomenal product, and as they look for ways to streamline in 2020 and beyond they were forced to make some tough choices. Great companies are marked by their ability to weather these types of storms, and I have no doubt RealWear will thrive.

Before last Friday, compersion came relatively easy to me on LinkedIn. Yet I always felt a twinge of envy... "Wow, that's amazing they got a new job, but what's wrong with me? Why aren't I further along?"

Since last Friday, you might think compersion would be even more difficult. After all, now the gap between my current situation and everyone else's is much wider, right? How could I possibly feel happiness for their success when I'm staring lack-of-success right in the face?

But this is a false narrative.

We've all heard that comparison is the thief of joy, and it's true. All of us have skills and talents independent of others' success. All of us have value before we ever lift a finger. And if comparison is the thief of joy, that means compersion is the seed of joy.

It's exciting when someone you know gets a promotion or a new job, because it's a fantastic opportunity to learn:

• How did they first learn about their new opportunity?
• What steps did they take to get there?
• What are they excited about?
• "Wow, that's an entirely new position / industry for you! How do you see yourself evolving in this new role?"

Every change in someone's career or personal life is a chance for compersion. It's usually the big changes that get all the attention, but why stop there? Compersion is a skill like any other: we can all get better with practice.

And so I keep practicing, because it lightens my heart, it feels good, and it gives me hope. Do I wish it was me announcing something new and awesome? Of course. But I know I can't wait for that to happen. I have to create my success one day at a time. A big part of that is gratitude for everything I've learned so far, and gratitude for everyone in my network who has helped me get to where I am today.

And the other part of my plan?

Compersion.

Joy in others' success reminds me to keep everything in perspective.

They made it happen, and so can I.