Compare and Despair | The Power of Envy

It's hard to determine who's really happy about your recent victory. Everybody is smiling, but behind those curves, an envious heart would attack you.

Even those who are close to you are not spared from this how much more people who barely know us?

Material possession is not the only thing why these feelings arise, Accomplishments, Recognition, Project completion even personal characteristics like charisma, connections, and self-discipline.

One red flag of this is overly competitive. My friend called me up, 'twas just random, and we've had a little chat, catching up. Then, suddenly this friend was already asking about personal stuff about how much I'm receiving as compensation. Of course, I was uncomfortable saying (who does, right?), that is a confidential matter and somehow, I didn't expect it from that friend 'coz as far as I can remember, that's quite a revelation from my friend's perspective (little late, eh) as we've discussed that as a group already. Anyway, before I mentioned a made-up number, my friend justified the question like, any number is nothing to me anyways 'coz I know I still earn higher. I was reminded of this scenario from what I've read before about low self-worth, that it's often masked as bravado or condescension.

Well, can't blame the person though. It's as if every possession material or accomplishment was just given, and not really earned. Even jobs, I for one referred a job for that friend and somewhat twisted the story that I was the one who received the job.

I can feel the resentment most of the time. It's like there's more time for that friend to diminish me rather than address personal self-esteem.?

From that scenario, I made some adjustments to the details I would tell my friends. I purposely withheld information that could attack my egos and let them feel that they were way ahead of me. Recently, when they're hearing new things about me, it's thru published features of me. With all that I've built and am building in the next phase of my career and business, I have no time for resentment.

Be careful of what you say or give updates to other people. Sometimes, a generic "not much" for the sake of their egos would be enough for you to be spared hate. Additionally, consider this from Robert Greene's book below to easily spot,

Law 46 page 400

Never Appear too Perfect.

Appearing better than others is always dangerous, but the most dangerous of all is to appear to have no faults or weaknesses. Envy creates silent enemies. It is smart to occasionally display defects, and admit to harmless vices, in order to deflect envy and appear more human and approachable. Only gods and the dead can seem perfect with impunity.

As per Robert Greene's book chapter, you may not see it but you will feel it someday -- unless, that is, you learn the strategies of deflection, little sacrificed to the gods of success. Either dampen your brilliance occasionally, purposefully reveal a defect, weakness, or anxiety, attribute your success to luck, or simply find yourself new friends. Never underestimate the power of Envy.

Author:

Carlos Payumo Garcia?|?Land Lord?|?Investment Banker?|?Capital Markets Professional?|?Real Estate Salesperson?| Lead Guitarist | Husband | Baptist

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