Communication Perspectives - Surrounded by Idiots

"Surrounded by Idiots" by Thomas Erikson was a good companion during my trip to the United States last month. The book offers a new way to understand the people around you that will change the way you interact with everyone. A framework that breaks down human behavior and argues that learning about our fellow human beings allows us?not only to understand them but also to build better relationships.

This book shows that what is important in any communication is not what you say, but what the person hears and interprets according to his/ her own thoughts, prejudices, and conventions of usage. To interact better, the authors say, you need to understand (i) your own preferences, (ii) other people's needs/likes, and (iii) how others perceive your behavior, so you can adjust your approach accordingly.

Here're a few key excerpts from the book.

“Everything you say to a person is filtered through his/her frames of reference, biases, and preconceived ideas.”

“It’s all about the mask you wear to fit into a given situation. We all have several different masks. Having one at work and one at home isn’t that unusual.”

“The stronger your self-understanding is, the greater your probability of adapting to the people around you.”

“Flexibility and the ability to interpret other people's needs is what characterizes a good communicator.”