Communication and Networking Tips for Introverts

Overcoming Challenges and Maximizing Impact

Public speaking consistently lists amongst the top fears of people in the US, with consistently 75 to 80% of individuals admitting that they are afraid of public speaking. Stats on introversion, meanwhile, are all over the place. But, most seem to show that a significant portion of the population is introverted (or at least considers themselves to be). What does this mean? Well, the need for building networks for personal advancement doesn’t vanish just because a person has social anxiety. If anything, that need increases.?

This blog takes a look at networking from the perspective of an introvert and tries to give people that may have struggles talking–in public or private–a little extra boost to their networking possibilities. If you feel a little flutter of unease every time you have to speak up in a meeting–or if the prospect downright terrifies you–read on.?

Active Preparation for Networking

Over ten years ago, Forbes published an article predicting a “Quiet Revolution ” was coming for introverts. It never arrived. The world still rewards those who speak up and speak out, the extroverts, because–let’s face it–nobody can read your mind. The world is not going to change and reward introverts for being introverted. Therefore, it’s best to prepare yourself for being an active and vocal participant in your employment and social life.?

Let’s start with an all-too-common occurrence in the workplace. The daily meeting. Pick a meeting. Take a sheet of paper. Write down one question you want answered and how you would ask that question. Bring it to the meeting. Ask the question. If this seems easy, excellent. You’re probably not nearly as introverted as you think. If it’s terrifying, also great. You’re the real target for this tactic.?

Now, extend this out. Have a short script about yourself in your head you can trot out anytime you’re introduced to someone new. Why? Because lack of preparation is the number one anxiety trigger that makes people fear interacting with people in public. Now, go a step further. Memorize a simple joke or two you like to tell, keep up with current events and be willing to share your opinions on them. You may not be the life of the party (or the convention, meeting, reception, etc.), but these tactics can get you out of the corner and networking with those around you.

Passive Preparation for Networking

In truth, the way you get comfortable networking, speaking in public, or being assertive in meetings is the same way you get comfortable with anything else: through practice. Learning how to speak in public, learning how to pick up on social cues, and learning what to say when and where is no different than learning to play an instrument. It takes time, effort, and practice.

One of the best ways to get that practice in, however, takes little effort at all. Just say “Hi” to… anyone and everyone. Maybe throw in a “good morning,” chat about the weather. Just because it is practice doesn’t mean it has to be hard. Why does this help? Just like toning a muscle, it gets you used to speaking even if it feels a little awkward.?

Speak to as many people as possible as frequently as possible and you might find that the habit delivers benefits far beyond preparing you for more consequential communications further down the line. You can, with little effort, cultivate a reputation for being friendly and outgoing which can only help you in networking down the line.?

Top Networking Tools for Introverts

One undeniable advantage the introverts of today have over those of the past is the benefit of distance and time provided by technology. It’s comparatively rare, today, that you have to be face to face for an interaction. And, while face-to-face interaction is still the gold standard for networking, tools like email, LinkedIn, and other social media platforms can give you a space to consider communications for a while instead of having to craft them on the fly.?

Putting Yourself in the Right Communications Headspace

For many people, introversion can emerge from a lack of personal confidence in their contributions and abilities. For what it’s worth, your contributions are valid and valuable. No one is without value. Staying in this mindset can be difficult, though, so here’s another way to think about it. By staying silent when you have a point, question, or contribution, you can actually be depriving your team or network of an important way to look at a challenge or opportunity. You can actually hinder others' understanding of an issue by not speaking up.?

Simultaneously, by not taking the opportunity to speak with a person at a conference and expand your network, you are actually depriving another individual of a helpful connection they could add to their network: you.?

Thinking of communications in this way can help the introvert reframe the issue from undervaluing their own contribution to emphasizing the value that others can derive from greater communication. Flip the calculus in your head from the cost of speaking up to the cost of not speaking up and you may find yourself more willing to let your voice be heard.

Social anxiety, introversion, fear… whatever you call it, the way people feel in groups is legitimate. Addressing this inner struggle with these few simple tips can help you grow your network and–just as importantly–help your skills and thoughts reach your networks more clearly and consistently. Try them, and if you see me out there, don’t be afraid to say hi.?