Communication Breakdown: How to Be a More Responsive You

Our society is saturated and constantly bombarded with information to the point we cannot even take the time to respond to personal correspondence we receive. We go through an internal evaluation process as a way of performing checks and balances to determine and decipher in a split second if we should archive or delete a message versus responding. A social experiment was performed as a way to test various theories about what circumstances and situations will elicit a response based on correspondence sent. The results were not what was originally expected:

1: Individuals responded +100% more to a longer, yet more personalized messages than to one that was short and generic

The theory was there would be a greater likelihood of receiving a response from a message like, "Haven't talked to you in a while, wanted to catch up and hear what you're up to," instead of something more lengthy and detailed due to the time commitment to read and respond to a longer correspondence. However, individuals responded 100% more to the longer message despite the perception that people wouldn't take the time to read and respond to a lengthy message due to being inundated with information.

2: Individuals were 50% more likely to respond to a complete stranger than to someone they knew

The theory was that by contacting someone you knew, and had a previous relationship with, you'd be more likely to get a reply back than by reaching out to someone completely new. However, there were 50% more responses from complete strangers than from those that a relationship had been built prior to the message sent.

3. The total percentage of responses that were received equaled the same percentage of individuals that viewed the message, viewed the profile and then chose not to respond

Probably the most disappointing statistic discovered was the number of responses, which was only 25%, was the same percentage of individuals that received and read the message, browsed the LinkedIn profile and then chose not to respond. The even more alarming part was all of the individuals that chose to read, browse and not respond were all individuals that a previous relationship had been established prior to the correspondence.

Our society is saturated and constantly bombarded with information to the point we cannot even take the time to respond to personal correspondence we receive.

Aside from the sheer disappointment of the results, the real challenge became trying to decipher the results and determine the motives behind the actions taken. Ultimately, two key reasons were determined as to why we choose not to respond:

1: What's In It For Us?

Depending on the request, we may or may not deem a response to be in our best interest or a productive use of our time. What, if any, relationship we have with this individual could cause us to respond, because of the unknown, or blow them off, because we know they're understand. We tabulate our personal criteria and determine, "Will responding be beneficial to me?" Sadly, whether a response is beneficial to a signal individual, mutually beneficial or deemed a selfless act by responding may be the deciding factor in how quickly, if at all, you'll hear back from that individual.

2: We're All Saturated With Information

Today, nearly everyone has some sort of filtering system whether it's the Gmail Priority Inbox or a personal assistant. As a result, sometimes we don't receive the message or it just gets buried in our message box. If it's buried, we only have so much time in a day to get through everything and if we actually get to it, it's possible we simply forget to physically respond.

We go through an internal evaluation process as a way of performing checks and balances to determine and decipher in a split second if we should archive or delete a message versus responding.

There's a few outside opinions on what we could do to be better communicators which include:

• 6 Ways to Become a Better Communicator by Refinery29
• 5 simple habits that will make you a better communicator by Caren Merrick
• 5 Super Effective Ways to Become a Great Communicator by Peter Economy

Here's three easy steps to take towards being a more responsive and effective communicator with all of the correspondence you receive:

1: Set Boundaries / Expectations

Some of the busiest individuals in the world have either clear expectations outlined on their website or through an autoresponder message that outlines what to expect in regards receiving a response back. Lines like, "We read everything, but often cannot respond to each e-mail," or, "I am no longer taking requests for speaking engagements," clearly showcase the guidelines and expectations.

If boundaries aren't necessary, then make a personal rule for responding. For example, personally, I respond within 24 hours, somehow, some way, even if I have to say, "I got it, I’m swamped, talk to you in a few days or next week."

2: Don't Spread Yourself Too Thin

We all want to be superman or superwoman, but by setting realistic expectations about ourselves and our time we won't ignore or disappoint the people that are most important to us.

3: Treat Others As You Want To Be Treated

To learn more about being a responsive communicator you can visit Pause. Think. Consider. and download or listen to today's episode on communication breakdown.

About The Author

Jesse Liebman is the creator of the podcast project Pause. Think. Consider. You can connect with him on Facebook, LinkedIn, YouTube and Instagram.