Communicating the Right Way

One of the things we can't take away from humans is communication. It is said that no man is an island, he is a social animal, and this comes into play every day in a man's life.

The feeling of connectedness, belonging, and connection is one that every human being on earth wants each day of his life. And when those things are not there, they feel left out, they feel out of place, they see themselves as not worthy of loving belonging.

Hence, at the center of it all is communication.

So, how do we communicate the right way?

There are different kinds of communication. Or, let me say, communication is in different ways. Trying to communicate and be communicated with.

Now, we will look at these two in part!

Let's first look at trying to communicate.

We have a lot of things we wish to communicate across. These include:

• Our thoughts
• Our feelings
• Our intentions
• Our answers
• Our observations
• A whole lot of other things

Based on the fact that man is a social being, he can't do without trying to always communicate with his fellow humans.

Now is there a right way and wrong way of trying to communicate? 

Sure, there are.

When you're trying to communicate, you don't want to come through as rude, controversial, dumb, and definitely not bold. Hence, what are the right ways to communicate with others?

Communicating physically

There are principles we ought to observe when in physical communication with people.

Maintain eye contact with the person:

Studies have shown that when we hold eye contact with people we're talking with, there is a higher possibility of most of our points being understood than when we don't.

People feel this connectedness when you maintain eye contact with them. They get drawn into your world and into your words. They can't help but try to get what you're trying to communicate across.

Don't look at the ceiling, nor look at an inexisting picture behind the person you're talking with. Even if you're admiring your shoes or theirs, don't look down. Try as much as possible to hold their eyes with yours every few minutes in the conversation.

 Clarify your thoughts in your head first 

Have you ever had a situation where someone was trying to tell you something but you can't seem to understand?

Not like your understanding is poor but the presentation itself is too poor to be understood.

To avoid scenarios like this, always try to understand your thoughts first. If you can't understand them, you can't communicate them across. How can you explain something you don't even have a grip on?

Therefore, before communicating your thoughts, feelings, advice, answers, etc. Try as much as possible to understand before you say it. This takes us to the principle of "think before you speak." 

Be confident

This is a very important aspect of physical communication. No one can make you feel inferior without your consent. – Eleanor Roosevelt

You're awesome, you're good at what you do. You can do whatever you set your mind to do. Just be confident of yourself. Your confidence will make your listener even more interested in you and what you have to say. Do you know that, even when you're not making much sense confidently, you have more opportunity of being listened to than one who is making sense without confidence. Confidence makes people think you've got something cool to give them and they can't wait to hear you out.

So, do not be shy. Be confident. Keep your head high and your shoulders up.

Don't be overconfident though.

Be Natural And Authentic

The world of today has made it almost impossible for us to be real. To be ourselves. But then, one thing we fail to realize is that people relate more to our real selves than a fake one.

Try as much as you can to be the original you. Keep the lies, keep the fake feelings. In fact, unless you're a good actor or actress, you can't perfectly hold your listener's attention. They'll always feel that there is something off about you. They can't relate to you wholly. Be real!

On your networking meetings, be yourself. 

Let others know who you are and not the picture you want to paint for them.

Make it a discussion!

Make it a discussion. Do not monopolize the discussion. The attention span of your listener will run out when you keep rambling on. Allow them to key in. You can use statements like: what do you think about this?; Do you get what I'm saying?; Am I making any sense to you?

Let them follow the discussion. That way, they can comfortably listen to you knowing that you care about their thoughts. Remember, no one really cares about you until they know how much you care.

If you don't care about them following the discussion and actually being a part of it, they may not care to give you their full attention.

Lastly, try to be there. In the present. Don't be talking to someone while your mind is somewhere else. Be both bodily and mentally present. Mindfulness is also recommended for physical communications. Put your focus on it and you will do just great.

These are a few tips of mine for communicating with others physically. Feel free to add yours in the comment section.

Meanwhile, what do you think about my points? 

Do you agree with them?