Commitment, and Why it is Good for You

Let's be honest here. I carry a lot of stress. I have super high expectations of myself. I'm doing it all alone (essentially). And I'm trailblazing. I'm joining a bunch of other healers in a vast web of trailblazing through the tangled brambles of US health care and North Americans' concept of wellness.

Yes, I have friends and mentors. Yes, I hire help. But I'm in charge of my own health and fitness, my home, and my business/career, how and whether I date. It's stressful. I often forget to acknowledge how stressful it is. I go and go and go until I can't anymore and then I shut down and collapse for a day or two. 

(Sound familiar? Keep reading.)

To some extent, this is a good way to be, because it's a part of who I am. As I discover more about me, I do my best to embrace that new me and respect her and give her the care and attention she deserves/demands. Also, I end up doing a lot, and that means there's a lot to keep track of or let slip through the cracks.

Sometimes, I let good habits drop. Because a lot of my good habits support each other, this leads to a spiraling domino affect that feels out of control. (Or a broken link in a chain perhaps? Metaphors are hard!) And then I wonder why I feel so crappy. Why I'm terrible at adulting. Why I can't seem to do ENOUGH. Why my life is so haaaarrd! (I know, natural order of things, entropy, chaos, if we don't keep working towards the order and feel goodyness we all say we want.)

Below are the keys though, that when I commit to them, with my heart, my calendar and my wallet, they keep life running pretty smooth. You'll have your own things. (If you don't, you should call me and we'll talk about whether consistent energy work is what you need.)

• Monthly chiropractic appointment. Just your standard quick adjustment. If I need a little more time, he takes it. Any questions or special problems coming up, I can ask and most likely, there's something we can try that is straightforward and effective. If I fall or get in a car accident, I make a special appointment. Maintenance costs less than emergencies. We all know the plan. This is the process that makes it all easier for everybody.

Schedule the next one before I leave.

Payment method on file.

Money set aside just for this purpose.

• Regular Massages. At least monthly, more often if I need more TLC. I have a few folks I like to see regularly and they each have a different feel and approach. But that physical touch and attention is necessary for my well being. If I don't get it, I feel out of sorts at unusual times, and even more out of sorts at the usual times. These just help me feel like I can handle whatever comes my way and nothing is as big a deal as I tend to make it out as. Again:

Scheduled in advance. (for several months if possible)

Money set aside just for this purpose.

• An accountability buddy. This relationship has evolved and it took a bit to find, but I've got a friend who is a fellow entrepreneur in a completely different field (Resume writing - let me know if you need help with this and I'll happily refer you!) We just talk regularly. What's going on with our businesses or our lives that needs sharing, input, whatever. Most often we each then say  something about how much we like each other and feel mutually inspired or energized by the call.

We have it on the calendar regularly, because we're both busy people.

We're flexible, and can always call up or text if something changes or  we have an existential crisis or something. (That's usually me.)

• Often I have some kind of official or unofficial coach or mentor. Right now my mentor is unofficial, meaning I'm not paying her for her guidance. That also means that when something comes up in her life that she needs to focus on, I can't count on regular coaching. It's ok for my needs right now.
• For around 6 months I have had, and hopefully will have for years into the future, an unlimited membership at Wild Orchid Pole and Aerial Dance. So I get to take part in everything from Pole Fitness, Strength and Flexibility, Aerial Yoga, Partner Acro Yoga to Sexy Pole, Twerkouts, and ATS Belly Dance. (And that's just what I have the skills for now.) This is a big investment of both time and money. I had to decide that this was super important to my health, well being, and personal growth. To get the best deal, I had to commit to six months of membership. (Also, I knew I wanted to do it that long, and that it would take at least that long to see progress. ) So again:

Decide.

Trade money for value.

Autopay.

Schedule ahead of time. (With $ penalty for last minute cancellations!)

• There are groups I'm part of where I am committed to showing up every time, with few exceptions. (Told you I was busy!) These don't usually cost me anything but time and skill, and I still get great returns. But I do have to show up.

Most of these habits, that I have decided are for sure important to my quality of life, just don't happen if there aren't a few things in place.

• Money  invested, set aside for nothing else, and on autopay if possible.
• Time scheduled, in advance, with people counting on me and disincentives for not showing up. I will let far too much time go by if I "wait until I need it". I know when I will need it, so I just set it up while it's top of mind, or set it and forget it.
• An ongoing relationship. This is key. This is why commitment is good for you! It makes communication easier. It feels like I've got a solid support network. I have something I can count on. I know what to expect. The healing can easily go deeper, because I feel safe and we both know the history, the context, where I've been and where I want to go. And because of all that, I can count on myself to show up.

So, to sum up. Commitment means Decision, Planning, Investment...all of which support the ACTION that reflects your commitment.  

The decisions require personal honesty and some soul searching so you KNOW the choice you make is what you need.

Planning takes some personal honesty and integrity too. Know how you work and plan accordingly, so it's easy to keep your commitment!

Investment. Have some skin in the game. For real. Money has energy, and spending it tells your brain how important something is to you.  (Volunteer work is different and not what we're talking about here.) If you haven't invested in something, and you want to get great and consistent transformation out of it (like stress relief), you will be disappointed in the long run, unless you are VERY self-motivated in all aspects of your life, in which case, this article is not for you! If you do invest, you have more reason to be engaged in the process and make it really work for you long term.

Oh yeah, and accountability. That is super important for me too. That's why many of the support team folks are paid professionals!

I offer long term coaching and ongoing energy work packages to help you find and cultivate that flame of passion, and retrain your brain to understand success your way, so you feel good about who you are and what you do, for the long term! Call me if you're ready to commit to yourself!

*PS. I know, I didn't mention receiving energy work. Often I do, receive it, that is. Definitely when I'm seeing lots of clients. And I'm working on building a structure that will make it super easy to receive regularly. In the meantime, I'm letting this be one of my sporadic things as needed, because I have so much other support I'm committed to right now. Also, I treat myself with Reiki regularly, daily if I'm really treating myself really well.